Never An Absolution
by Dulcedecorumest
Summary: Post The Long Con, the nature and depth of James and Kate's emotional connection is explored further, revealing some startling truths about each other. Character and plot development galore! Story's much better than summary. Rated M for later chapters
1. Chapter 1

Hey y'all this is my first ever fanfic, it's a Sawyer/Kate POV and story, however whenever it's Sawyer's point of view I will use the name James. I want it to be angsty and deep so it will take me some time and it is set, post The Long Con.

As you know the characters and the show do not belong to me, etc, etc. I am just trying to use my creative writing skills to tell what I think would be a great story.

Please, please review and comment and feel free to email meon what I have written so far!

**Chapter 1**

James stared out to the sea, and asked himself for the hundred thousandth time why he even cared what she thought of him. His life had been a series of misfortunate events but he was well aware that even when there seemed to be no choice, there was one. He had made his peace with the fact that he was weak, that he couldn't fight the demon inside him that made him do and say the majority of the things he did. Hell he was even considering exorcising that particular demon once and for all. The one thing he could never get over though, was her.

She was in his dreams, his every other waking thought, and when he got her out of his head, she was there in person, drawing him to her like a moth to a flame. And just like that moth the closer he got the more it hurt and burned.

He'd seen the disgust and pity in her eyes, her face, her very demeanor, and yet he'd also seen the undeniable truth. She was drawn to him too, it was glaringly obvious she did not want to be, and for some reason that made it hurt even more.

And this Wayne she'd talked to in the hatch while he was regaining consciousness… he was the crux of the matter. James figured he must have been her stepfather or her mother's boyfriend, yet it didn't make sense that she believed that he was a part of her. Unless there was a Jerry Springer archetype explanation, and this Wayne was her biological father? Highly unlikely, he must have gotten it mixed up, or had he? And more importantly did it even matter? He himself hated the fact that she could affect him the way she could. He hated the fact that she was his weakness, his ever growing weakness in this mad world he'dcrash landed into.

"Sawyer, I need to talk to you." Son of a bitch, that fucking name! James regretted ever telling people on the island that was his name. Who was he kidding, that persona he'd adopted had died the second the world thought they were all dead. Which was probably around the same time they crashed, hell, maybe even earlier when the plane first disappeared off the radar.

"Hey Sawyer!" Kate yelled in his face. "Damn it Freckles I heard you the goddamn first time you hollered my damn name! What the hell do you want so bad?" James finished off the sentence with his trademark once over, damn she never had an ugly day in her life did she?

"I need to talk to you!" Kate repeated agitatedly. "Well speak, Freckles you got my undivided attention."

"I gotta go into the jungle and find Jack, do you think you could take my shift in the hatch?" Well, well, she wanted him to babysit the dinosaur computer in that creepy contraption so she could go and get her mack on with Captain Jackass did she?

"You could be belligerent as usual or you could just say yes without dragging this entire conversation out, your choice Tex, but I don't have time for this so a simple yes or no will do." Kate snapped.

"Okay Sassafras, I'll Bubbles that stupid computer, when does your shift start?"

Kate inwardly flinched in surprise at his easy answer, was he feeling okay? Maybe the infection in his shoulder had started again? "It starts in about thirty minutes, come on I'll walk to the hatch with you." She responded.

"Fine by me, lead the way." James started to follow her and wondered what he'd just gotten himself into. He hated that concrete monstrosity with a passion and being in it made him want to crawl out of his skin and run. But he had to admit it had almost been worth it to see the look in her eyes when he'd said he would do it, no questions asked.

As they walked through the jungle Kate couldn't help but puzzle over Sawyer's easy response. And the urge to ask what had brought on this change in personality was overwhelming. After the episode with the guns she'd pretty much stayed well away from him. Not because he'd become persona non grata once again, but because he'd hurt her real bad by playing with her emotions like that. She didn't have a moral high ground to stand on seeing as she'd done many reprehensible things in her past and even on Craphole Island itself. However, this was different, she'd genuinely started to let herself feel for him and he'd conned her like he'd conned dozens of women before her. And the realization that whatever this thing between them was had taken such a hold that she hadn't seen it coming scared the hell out of her. "My my aren't we sociable today, a little conversation wouldn't kill ya Freckles." He quipped.

"Sorry, I'm still recovering from your very uncharacteristic acquiescence Tex." Kate imparted truthfully. "My acquiescence, huh?" Without turning to look, Kate could hear the smirk in his voice as he said that. "Well considering you conned me and the entire island just a week ago, yeah Sawyer! Is this another con? You got something up your sleeve?" James couldn't help but wince, he'd screwed this up bad. But what was there to regret it wasn't like she would ever make a move towards him anyway.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

They made the rest of the trek to the hatch without exchanging any words. Kate was lost deep in thought thinking about the real reason she was taking him to the hatch. She couldn't help but feel slightly apprehensive and was more than a little thrown by Sawyer's unusual response to her request.

Upon entering the hatch, Locke met them at the door, "Hello Kate, James, can't say I am not glad to get out of here, I've been on shift on my own for the last 8 hours and I have to admit I am starting to get a little stir-crazy."

Kate smiled tentatively at Locke, "Well lucky for you Sawyer's gonna take over now, give you a chance to stretch your legs and get some fresh air."

"Yeah lucky me too, huh, I get to stay in here and press a goddamn button like some lab monkey." James said mockingly. Kate rolled her eyes and Locke nodded in silent agreement with her reaction as he walked around them to leave the hatch. Sawyer turned to Kate and muttered, "Self-righteous Mr. Clean."

Kate couldn't help but smile at this, "Do you have to give everyone and everything a nickname?"

"No, as a matter of fact I don't Freckles, but I never heard anyone complain, so why the hell not?" James replied. He swaggered towards the computer, and struggled to suppress a shiver of disgust with more than a tinge of fear as he approached the machine. Kate watched him closely, as she tried to gage exactly what kind of mood he was in. Although it didn't really matter as his temper always seemed to flare up at the slightest provocation.

James felt her eyes watching him as he sat down at the computer and he turned in surprise to see her sit down on the couch. "Whatcha doin' Sweetcheeks dontcha have a date with Our Doctor the Hero in the Jungle of Mystery somewhere?"

Kate rolled her eyes at Sawyer's new nickname for Jack, the man was incorrigible! "Well actually, Tex, I am right where I am supposed to be." She replied, casually.

James' pulse did a small jump as he allowed himself to think for a second that she was actually going to be truthful about her attraction to him or something along those lines. 'Don't be a fool James, she's not here for anything like that, ever known her not to have a hidden agenda?' He asked himself, bitterly.

"Oh yeah, whatcha here for then, really? To babysit me? 'Cause if that's the case there are more interesting things for a sitter to do than just watch, Freckles." James gave her a smoldering look that told Kate exactly what line of thought his "other things" fell under.

Kate crossly suppressed the small thrill of excitement she felt as she looked into his eyes. 'What is the matter with me?' She asked herself in annoyance. This was getting ridiculous she couldn't react to the smallest look or actions or words that came from Sawyer in this manner, it was just not right. _He_ wasn't right for her.

Kate took a deep breath, "I brought you here so you and I could man the hatch together, Sawyer-"

"You _tricked_ me? Hell Freckles, why the hell do I even bother with you people?" He growled irately, James felt a twinge that felt very much like his feelings were hurt, and he didn't like it. He couldn't believe it, after everything, when he'd been so upfront with her she'd tricked him into coming into this waking nightmare!

"_I tricked you_? You have some nerve Sawyer, after everything you've done, you have the audacity to claim I tricked you?" Kate yelled back, 'Well done Kate way to keep your cool!' she congratulated herself.

"You know what Freckles, forget it. I get it loud an' clear now, Sir Fixalot asks you to get me into the hatch so he can look for the guns with Daniel Boone an' you're ready willing and able to do what the Doc ordered." James ground out, angrily. Kate's eyes flickered at his astute observation, 'How does he do that?' she asked herself.

James didn't miss the tell-tale flicker of her eyes as Kate pulled on her poker-face, "Well, I'll be damned, I'm right aren't I?" James let out a small laugh as he shook his head, she was unbelievable sometimes!

Kate stubbornly refused to let herself feel guilty for his obvious disappointment in her, 'Served him right he stole the guns and played _her_ in the process. Time to get a taste of his own medicine!' and with that she resolved not to let whatever he said affect her.

"I'm not discussing this with you Sawyer, you lost any moral high ground the minute you pulled that stunt on us last week." She said harshly.

"You see, Freckles that is where you an' I are different, I embrace my flaws an' don't give a damn about what the rest of the world thinks of me. Whereas you don't wanna give up on the hope that everybody will love an' respect ya. I got news for ya, Puddin', society tends to frown on murderers, no matter how pretty an' innocent ya look…it comes with the territory."

James saw he hit the mark with his comment as she flinched at his use of the word murderer. Bingo! She think she was the only one who could manipulate people? He watched with a twisted fascination rooted in obsession as she struggled to maintain her unperturbed composure.

"That was low Sawyer, even for you." She responded resignedly, as she gave up the pretence of not being affected by what he'd said.

James tilted his head to the side as he studied her, "Hmm, now we're getting' somewhere Freckles. You can hide your thoughts and emotions from everyone else, but know this, I _always_ know what 's really goin' on in that pretty little head of yours." Kate looked up at him, as he was standing right in front her, the words had been said without malice but almost matter of factly, as if it went without saying.

"You know nothing about me Sawyer, nothing. Now get out of my way." She demanded quietly, looking him in straight in the eye as she rose from her position on the couch and pushed past him.

James grabbed her arm, in what was fast becoming a regular occurrence with them. Kate violently shook his hand off her arm and strode for the door. As she pulled it open, James' hand slammed it back shut missing her nose by half an inch. Kate turned around angrily, and James moved in so close their breaths mingled and their noses were nearly touching. Kate held her breath with nervous anticipation as to what was going to happen next. 'Is he going to try to kiss me? Will I let him? Do I want him to?' She asked herself frantically.

"Ya wanna keep that button from countin' down to zero an' beyond, you better sit your ass down on that couch. 'Cause I swear to God, Puddin' you walk outta that door, Locke an' Jacko will have a lot more to worry about than the friggin' guns. You brought me here under false pretences an' I'd rather die a thousand deaths than stay here on my own after that. You want me here, ya stay here with me!" He hissed angrily, James was breathing heavy, with anger and lust and a dangerous emotion he didn't want to examine.

Against his better judgment all he wanted to do was kiss her… and more. He could feel those very same feelings emanating from her, yet something inside him made him hold himself back. He paused for a moment savoring the scent of her hair, skin, fear, anger and desire, before he pulled away and calmly walked back to the computer. He resumed his seat and entered the code as the timer was dangerously close to reaching zero.

Kate remained pressed against the door, shaking with emotion she couldn't define; she hadn't even _heard_ the alarm going off! She hurriedly stormed off into the bathroom, slamming the door with all the frustration and anger pent up inside. Pressing her back against the bathroom door, she slid down to a sitting position and exhaled loudly. 'I hate him! I can't fucking stand him, he physically makes me sick!' She thought to herself passionately. 'He's just like Wayne!' She added for good measure. She took another calming yet shaky breath, 'Who am I kidding? He's not really like Wayne, never was really except for the accent and the rudeness.'

Kate shook her head ruefully, comparing him to her stepfather had been an almost effective barrier, but deep down she knew it wasn't true. Sure Wayne had preyed on the weak, been a boor of a man, but just because Sawyer was a conman didn't make him like Wayne any more than being a boor and rude had made the Marshal like Wayne. She could be honest enough with herself to make this admission. But that was as far as she was willing to go with the self-honesty at the moment. She wrapped her anger at Sawyer like a protective blanket around her heart and rose from the floor, after splashing some water on her face, she walked back out towards Sawyer and the computer.


	3. Chapter 3

Thank you to **ClaireandKate** for reviewing my first chapter, the encouragements are greatly appreciated.

As for **CowboyswithDimples**' review of chapter 2 I hope you like the light-heartedness of this chapter in comparison. However I must warn y'all the angst is not yet over for these two!

**Chapter 3**

James didn't even look up from where he sat, he was reading Moll Flanders, a book he'd found on the shelf. It hurt like Hades to read the smallish print without his glasses however, it was all the same to him since, the prospect of the next 4 and a half hours in this concrete monstrosity with her was just as painful if not more.

Kate walked up to the bookshelf pointedly ignoring Sawyer and picked the first book she came across, then sat down, purposely turning her back on him. She looked down at the cover, and realized she was holding a copy of Joseph Conrad's, Heart of Darkness. 'Great! Just what I need a depressing book about living in the African jungle, as if my reality isn't bad enough.' She thought darkly.

They sat in the room in silence for over an hour pretending to read and that they were unaware of the other's existence. The tension between them was palpable, a veritable miasma of anger and resentment hanging over their heads.

Finally James, gave in to his curiosity and turned around to see what she was reading. He couldn't see from his seat as the pages of the book were facing him, so he walked up to her to take a look. Chuckling to himself he realized that the Queen of Stubborness had fallen asleep! He walked round the couch so he was facing her, and allowed himself to study her sleeping form. He couldn't help but feel some tenderness towards her innocent face, relaxed and devoid of the usual wariness. She looked much younger than she was, and he found himself fascinated as he watched her gently breathing in and out as she slept. Realising that he was staring at her with an intensity that would no doubt frighten her should she open her eyes right then, James walked to the bunker to get her blanket.

'Sonofabitch, you've always been a sucker for a pretty face, James Lee Ford, and I am telling you right now to stop it. She's not meant for you, she doesn't even really want you. It's Jack she wants, hell, maybe even Captain Falafel, but is sure ain't you, so just stop this insanity now.' He berated himself, disgusted, he couldn't believe he was falling for a manipulative, possibly pathological liar, murdering fugitive! He marched back into the room and covered her with the blanket debating whether or not to tuck her in. He knew it was way past lust now, he was descending to some previously unexplored depths and he just did not want any part of it. Against his will, he was being sucked into this vortex of anger, tenderness, lust, bitterness, hate and strengthening emotional connection that was his relationship with Kate. And as he lifted the book out of her hands and simultaneously brushed a tendril of her hair away from her face, he couldn't help but give a derisive snort at his unconscious actions. 'You're ten damn kinds of fool!' He told himself as he resumed his seat at the computer, ignoring his book he simply stared at the screen.

Kate struggled against the hands that gripped her shoulders and were shaking her, "Aaargh! Let go of me! I won't let you, I'd rather die, leave me alooooooooone!" She realized she was screaming and crying and the steel cage she was in changed shape as did the face of the hands holding her.

"Come on Sassafras, wake up, it's just a dream!" James pleaded his voice bordering on desperation. 'What was she seeing!' James felt fear clutch at his heart as he looked into her terror stricken eyes. Her pupils were dilating and contracting to an unseen enemy and he couldn't help but feel the fear she was obviously feeling. It was palpable and it sent chills down his spine and the hairs on his neck were standing of their own volition.

Kate snapped back into reality, she wasn't in the cage anymore she was in the hatch on the Island, with Sawyer. She took shuddering breaths and went limp, trying to focus on the now and forget the horror she'd just relived. She knew she should shrug Sawyer's hands off her shoulders and put up the usual barriers but she couldn't quite find the strength just yet. Besides they were solid and unthreatening, she felt slightly comforted and she didn't want to move. "Are you okay, Sass? You were havin' one hell of a nightmare there, I've been trying to wake you up for the last five minutes." James asked her gently, concern tingeing his voice.

Kate opened her mouth to speak but no words came out, she cleared her throat and tried again. "Yeah, I'm…. fine." She managed to croak out, looking at the floor, when he didn't respond she risked looking at his face. Kate saw genuine concern in his face, "I don't even remember what I was dreaming about." She lied but she didn't care, there was no way she was going to tell him what she'd been going through in her dreams.

Kate drew a sharp breath, was that pity she saw flickering in his eyes? She mentally and physically drew on her cloak of wariness as she withdrew from him and forced herself to get to her feet, albeit a little shakily. "I'm fine Sawyer, save your pity for yourself where it's actually needed." She said cruelly before turning around to face him with a bit more distance between them. James flinched, 'She can be a real bitch sometimes can't she?' He couldn't help but bristle at her now frosty demeanor. She stood a few feet away from him, hostility radiating from her in waves. Her hands were curled into fists at her sides and she was eyeing him like she could stab a dagger into his chest at the slightest provocation. James shook his head ruefully, before getting up from the couch and standing toe to toe with her in unspoken response to her challenging stance. He could feel his temper flaring, he wasn't going to let her get all snooty with him for waking her up from her nightmare.

Kate stared at a point over his shoulder, breathing heavily with pent up anger, she always felt this rage after she had the dream. It was either rage or tears, and she was not going to cry in front of Sawyer! "Don't push me Sawyer!" She said angrily, the huskiness of her voice lent credence to the threat, James looked at the top of her head for another second before he grabbed her upper arms and twisted his lower body to avoid the knee that was headed swiftly to his groin. "Not so fast, Sheera! We're gonna talk about this like civilized folk!" He gasped as they grappled for the dominance, she tried to head butt him and he dodged that too, using his left arm to force her face down into the couch and planting his knee on her lower back to stop her from moving.

Kate bucked like a wild horse before managing to twist her body halfway round and head butt Sawyer as hard as she could. He yowled in pain but didn't loosen his grip on her arms, and dragged her with him as he fell backwards onto the floor. She landed on top of him, winded just like him and paused to take a breath before renewing her struggles. James managed to overpower her by flipping his legs over hers and straddled her, sitting on her chest so that her legs flailed uselessly. Kate panted with the effort it was taking to try and wriggle out of the hold Sawyer had on her. 'Damn him! Damn him to hell! Why did I have to have the dream in front of him!' She tried to head butt him in the groin but he was too far away. James laughed as he saw what she was trying to do. "I can think of better things you can do with your head down there Freckles."

She sent him daggers as she suddenly stopped her struggles, "Get off me, Sawyer, you're gonna crush my lungs!" She huffed. James shook his head, "Not until you promise to behave and stop acting like a goddamn bitch in heat."

Kate's chest expanded with rage at the comparison, "Fuck you Sawyer, burn in Hell, or sit there all day if you fucking like, either way I'm not promising you shit, you greasy haired scum of the fucking earth, redneck bastard!"

"My, my Miz Kate, you sure got a mouth on ya! Betcha Saint Jack doesn't know his lil Florence Nightingale can cuss like that!" James replied laughing outright at her colorful language. She really was full of surprises!

Kate took a deep breath and pushed her legs up and under Sawyer's arms. Then over, hooking her knees onto Sawyer's shoulders, using the momentum and the element of surprise she pushed her upper body forward using her legs as leverage. With a grunt of satisfaction, she landed on top of Sawyer and rolled away from him, standing up in one fluid motion.

She flashed him a self-satisfied grin as he stood up and gave chase, she ran behind the computer using it as a buffer as she feinted to the left then to the right. "Who's laughing now, Tex?" She giggled as he glared at her murderously across the computer, he growled in response as the timer started to blare. They both stopped, as James grumbled, "Damn button!" He paused to enter the numbers glancing in her direction warily, "Don't you dare move, Freckles." Kate laughed, "Okay _James_ whatever you say."

James flinched, "Sonofabitch, you'd try the patience of a goddamn saint!" He hit, execute before turning all of his attention to Kate.

She wiggled her eyebrows at him, her eyes dancing with mischief as she ran towards the pantry. James slammed his body into the rapidly closing gap of the pantry door and grabbed Kate by the hair. Yanking it roughly she yelped as he dragged her back towards the couch. "That's hurts, Sawyer!"

"I know Freckles." He replied matter of factly as he pushed her onto the couch. Kate rubbed her scalp as she looked up at him, with bright unshed tears in her eyes. James felt his heart lurch at this, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean ta yank so hard, Freckles." His face was a picture of guilt and remorse as he unconsciously moved over to rub her scalp in apology. Kate moved away from him sharply, "I got it."

James let his hand fall to his side, resignedly, "It kinda got outta hand huh?" Kate accepted this olive branch by looking up at him with a mischievous gleam in her eye, "Yeah but it was fun, I beat you…again, _and_ you even said sorry!"

"What? When you ever _beat_ me, Freckles? I'd say I've beat you every single time if we are talkin' 'bout matters of _fact_-" James scoffed.

"Oh my God you're such a sore loser! Fine you may have beaten me physically in the past but when it comes to a battle of wits I win _every_ single time, and you don't even have the physical advantage anymore-"

James bristled with good-natured indignation, "you're a damn liar, Sassafras, getting' the Doc or Ali or whoever else you can manipulate to do your dirty work ain't winnin' a battle of wits. That's just plain old underhandedness if ya ask me."

"Why would anyone ask you anything, Sawyer?" Jack demanded as he walked into the room.

James and Kate turned startled, to look at Jack. The spinal surgeon noticed that as usual, Sawyer's face turned into an angry scowl when he laid eyes on Jack. He also didn't fail to notice the smile on Kate's face dying, as she stood up, and finger combed her unbound curls into a semblance of order before tying her up into a bun. She looked at him seriously, with a searching, enquiring look trying to discern if he'd found the guns or not.

James too watched Kate rearrange her hair and straighten her appearance and couldn't help but observe the relaxed Kate of a few moments ago had been replaced by business-like I-Got-Somethin'-To-Prove-Kate with the appearance of the Good Doctor. He turned to look at Jack and also noticed that the Doc was frowning at her like she was punished school girl to his Principal, whom he thought was having way too much fun in detention.

James smirked, this should be interesting.


	4. Chapter 4

Oh my God, I think I am possessed or something! I just keep thinking of new things to add to this story! Thank you all for your reviews, keep on reading and telling me what you think, it makes for a better story.

**Chapter 4**

Jack looked at Sawyer, sometimes he just wanted to beat the Southerner into a bloody pulp if only for the satisfaction of knowing that he'd done something about this ever growing thorn in his side. He didn't understand why the man was so contrary, it was as if he'd been planted on the Island simply for the purpose of undermining Jack at every turn. He couldn't help but feel the instant irritation that always bubbled inside him whenever he was in the same breathing space as Sawyer. 'What is his problem?' Jack asked himself for the umpteenth time, since they crash landed on the Island. And what made matters worse was Kate's relationship with the scumbag, Jack did not understand how the two of them could possibly have anything in common. Despite Kate's criminal past, he believed with his heart and soul she was a good woman who'd just made some bad choices along the way. Choices he was confident there was a good explanation for. The same couldn't be said for Mr. Redneck over here. He was just a parasite, a genuine blight on humanity who served no purpose and helped no one. And now to make matters worse, he had the guns, guns Jack and Locke had been unable to find, much to his chagrin Jack had to admit one thing to himself. Sawyer was smarter than he'd thought, a cunning and wily coyote, and it galled Jack to no end that he had not seen the gun theft coming!

"I take it ya didn't find the hardware huh Doc?" Sawyer asked almost politely. Kate watched on with interest as the two men eyed each other up. She couldn't help but feel apprehensive at what this conversation might escalate to, she could tell from the look on Jack's face that he was at the end of his tether where Sawyer was concerned.

"Give me back the guns, Sawyer." Jack demanded, the tone in his voice brooking no insolence. James shook his head slightly, "Didn't your Mama teach ya manners Doc? I didn't hear ya say please." He mocked, insolently. Jack nodded, "Fine Sawyer, give me back the guns, please."

James shook his head, "Now if I didn't know any better, I'd think ya don't mean it." Jack tsked impatiently, his voice rising with anger, "I'm done talking to you like you're a normal person, you proved your point, we underestimated you, now for the last time, give me back the guns Sawyer!"

"No." James replied evenly, he was standing in front of Jack, his shoulders relaxed, his face showing slight indifference at Jack's ire. Jack moved forward so that they were almost standing toe-to-toe, James raised his chin and eyed Jack steadily, his body still maintaining its relaxed stance. Kate exhaled sharply and moved forward warily, ready to step in and stop the two men from coming to blows.

"I'm done talking to you Sawyer, I hate to do this but you've left me no choice." Jack said in a resigned tone before he balled his fist and punched James in the gut. James doubled slightly and gave a grunt of pain. He straightened up and looked Jack square in the eye, "Doc, ya get that one for free, hit me again and we gonna have ourselves a long overdue throwdown. And I won't stop til ya say Uncle."

Jack flinched inwardly, the lack of emotion on Sawyer's face as he spoke and the icy, controlled anger burning in Sawyer's eyes was slightly intimidating to behold. Before he could respond Kate pushed herself between the two men, "Stop it, this doesn't solve anything!"

"Stay outta this Freckles, this is between me an' the Doc." James said as he pushed her aside firmly. Kate tried to get back in between the two men who were now toe-to-toe, but their bodies were unyielding, changing tactics, she grabbed Jack's arm and pulled. "Jack, please, it's not worth it. You won't get anything out of him if you do this." To her surprise, Jack ignored her, shrugging her hand off like she was a pesky insect. "You heard him Kate, stay out of this, it's between me and him." Jack didn't even look at her as he spoke.

James couldn't believe it, 'Well I'll be damned, Christmas has come early this year, this time I ain't holdin' back at all. I let him get away with it 'cause he's the Hero, 'cause he's a good man, but unh huh not today, Jacko you've used up your last get of jail free card. Now, to let the mountain come to me.' He thought with anticipation.

As James had known, Jack made the first move, swinging his right fist straight for James' face. Ducking the blow, James slid to the left and delivered two swift uppercut jabs into Jack's side. As Jack doubled over to his side in a bid to protect his kidneys from suffering another blow, James went around Jack, hooking his right arm around Jack's neck and applying pressure. Jack clawed at James' arm, then elbowed him as hard as he could in the ribs. Kate screamed at them to stop, but neither one of them heard her, at the same time Sayid and Ana-Lucia came running into the room skidding to halt at the sight of the two men fighting. "Help me stop them!" She cried frantically running towards James and Jack, as Sayid and Ana-Lucia also ran up to the two men.

Jack had freed himself from James' grip, and the two men were currently grappling each other to the ground. Sayid grabbed James as Ana-Lucia and Kate dragged Jack off him. "You bastard, is that all you got, huh!" Yelled an enraged Jack, James spat blood on the floor before replying in kind. "I got plenty more where that came from, boy! Get off me, Ali, this ain't got nothin' to do with ya!" He violently shrugged Sayid's grip off before heading for Jack, who also shrugged both Kate and Ana-Lucia off him and ran to collide with James' fist in a sickening crunch. The three bystanders shuddered in revulsion as blood spurted from Jack's nose. James proceeded to land three more blows into Jack's crumpling figure before Sayid and Kate dragged him off Jack. As he kicked in violent protest against their iron-tight hold on him, Jack shrugged off Ana-Lucia's supportive hand on his shoulder and rose unsteadily from his knees onto his feet. He bore down on the threesome, bellowing, "Let him go! Let him go! I am gonna finish this once and for all!" Jack barreled into James' chest the momentum pushing the three of them into the hatch wall.

Kate and Sayid collided painfully with the concrete, both of them losing their grip on James who half standing half sitting was pinned against the wall and started punching Jack viciously in the back. Jack head butted James in the chin forcing him to bite himself on the lip hard. "Sonofabitch!" James howled, as he shoved Jack off him. Jack stumbled backwards, barely missing a collision with Ana-Lucia's fast retreating form. As he skidded on the floor, James was there jumping on him, he grabbed the surgeon by the collar and started punching him in the face with violent fervor. "You wanna piece me Doc? You got it! How 'bout that! And this!" Each one of his exclamations punctuated with a sickening crunch as he pounded into Jack's face. Sayid ran and tackled Sawyer from the side, the two of them sliding across the floor before they hit the door of the safe the guns had been stored in. Kate and Ana-Lucia both ran to Jack who lay on the floor lifelessly. Kate gasped in horror at the state of Jack's face, it was covered in blood, and one eye was swollen shut. As each woman reached down to grab an arm, Jack coughed, blood sputtering out of his mouth, and spraying the women's hands and clothing. "Oh my God." Ana-Lucia said fearfully, as they sat Jack up and then dragged him to the couch.

The alarm started to sound as the counter dangerously approached zero, Kate left Jack on the couch and punched in the numbers. Ana-Lucia began wiping the blood away from Jack's nose and mouth using the blanket on the couch.

James sat subdued by Sayid's steadfast hold on him, the two of them were breathing heavily from all the exertion it was taking. The bloodthirst still burned bright in James' eyes and he looked positively feral with blood and sweat soaking his blonde hair into a stringy mess and his lips curled back in a snarling grin. "Say Uncle." Sayid looked at Kate over James' head with a tinge of fear, at the violence in his voice as he said it. Kate stared at Sayid's hands, the knuckles were white with effort to keep the Southerner restrained. Transfixed, she looked at Sawyer with a newfound respect mingled with fear. 'Oh my God, he's an animal.'

Pulling himself forward, Jack opened his remaining good eye, to stare at Sawyer, after a pregnant pause he whispered, "Uncle." James, immediately stopped struggling against Sayid, although his face still looked dangerous, inside he was processing Jack's capitulation.

As Jack leaned back against the couch in exhaustion, Kate, Sayid and Ana-Lucia all looked at each other unsure what in all they'd just witnessed was the hardest to believe.


	5. Chapter 5

Okay guys Chapter 5 and 6 I wrote together, I hope they don't disappoint! Don't forget to R n R that's what has motivated me to write so much in such a short space of time!

**Cowboys** thank you for the glowing review on chapter 4 I have never written a fight scene before so I tried real hard to make it credible yet exciting. Hope you like these too!

Let me know what you think works and doesn't work, I wanted these two chapters to be a little more back story after all the action of the last ones.

**Chapter 5**

That evening news of the Jack/Sawyer showdown spread like wildfire along the beach. Everyone had seen a frantic blood-spattered Kate racing to Jack's tent to get medical supplies then race back into the jungle in the direction of the hatch. Locke had asked Kate what had happened and she'd told him the two men had fought, and she needed to get back to the hatch. Speculation about who was injured had surmised that Jack had beaten Sawyer pretty badly because of the guns. It wasn't a well-kept secret that Jack and Locke had gone to look for the guns or that they hadn't managed to find them. And everyone had witnessed the argument Locke and Jack had had about whether it was so wrong to let Sawyer keep the guns anyway. Then Jack's subsequent march to the hatch to interrogate the unrepentant Southerner.

It had been 3 hours since Jack and James had spoken with their fists, Kate sighed as she looked at Jack's battered and bruised face. Sayid had reset Jack's nose which luckily hadn't broken in an akward place. And Ana-Lucia had had to stitch his eyebrow because Kate had been stitching James' lower lip. Kate thought back to the unreadable expression that had been on his face when she'd approached with him with the needle and thread.

James had simply nodded at Kate, to get on with it and after swigging from the bottle of scotch that Kate had brought from Jack's medicinal supplies, he hadn't moved, made a sound or given any indication that he was even aware of her presence as she'd stitched the cut up. When she'd finished he'd nodded his thanks before dismissing her with a glance.

Kate sighed again, Jack was asleep, breathing noisily through his swollen, purple nose and puffy and chapped lips. There were flecks of dried blood in his nostrils and lips and he looked nothing like the handsome spinal surgeon she had gotten to know. Both his eyes were swollen, the right one was completely shut and rapidly changing color. She couldn't help but think, 'He brought this on himself. He knows Sawyer has anger management issues and he still provoked him, it was bound to happen.' Having seen the way Sawyer had fought Kate had to wonder why he'd held back from flattening Jack for so long.

It was evident that the fight hadn't been fair, Sawyer had been in more than his fair share of brawls and God alone knew what kind of childhood the conman had had. It was evident in the way he fought that the man knew his way around a fight no matter how evenly matched the opponents had been physically. Sawyer fought like a streetfighter, no rules except for one, winning. That said he hadn't used any underhanded tactics like he had in his fight with Sayid. Jack however, had made it seem like a fair fight because for all that he lacked in experience he more than made up for in enthusiasm. All these observations ran through Kate's mind as she watched Jack asleep, fascinated by Sawyer's handiwork. They had moved Jack to the bunk-bed, he'd been unable to speak from pain and exhaustion so Sayid and Ana-Lucia had carried him there while Kate went to get the medication. Kate felt her heart-strings tugging in sympathy and concern for Jack, 'Poor Jack, I don't think he's ever been beaten up in his life. Well, except for that one time with Ethan.'

"Hey, you wanna grab something to eat? Sayid's whipped up some type of Iraqi dish that is quite tasty, he'll be fine, come and eat." Kate looked up at Ana-Lucia, masking her distrust of the former cop. She got up and followed the earthy Latina to the other room where Sayid was fussing around some plates. He looked up at the women and smiled apologetically, "I've done the best I can but I don't quite think it tastes as good as does when my Mother makes it." Kate smiled back at the Iraqi, "It smells good, and since I've never had your Mom's cooking, I am sure I won't be able to tell the difference." Sayid grinned, "That is precisely what I am afraid of." They shared a look before Ana-Lucia strode to the table, "Hey as long as it is food, I ain't complaining, let's eat!" As Kate sat down she looked up sharply, "What about Sawyer?" Ana-Lucia gave a rude snort, "What about him? After all the shit he's caused, think he deserves to eat? Don't worry, Mother Theresa, he's fine, Sayid already took some food to him." The cop looked scornfully at Kate through the corner of her eye before turning her attention back to the food.

Kate felt her hackles rising, 'Bitch. Who the hell does she think she is anyway? Just like a cop to look down on anyone who isn't a cop!' Kate was already suspicious of the woman and she knew that she seriously did not like her as a person already. To add fuel to the fire was the issue of exactly what kind of relationship Ana-Lucia had with Jack before the crash. 'Ten bucks says the brazen hussy was flirting with him at the_ very_ least.' She thought to herself.

Sayid could feel the antipathy between the two women, and he was not going to get involved in whatever unspoken issues they had with each other. He respected Ana-Lucia as he felt they had a kinship through shared past experiences as law enforcers. However, if he had to choose sides he'd stand by Kate, he liked and respected her and once upon a time had entertained the possibility of there being something more between them. Sayid sighed inwardly, as he remembered exactly what had erased those thoughts from his mind, Shannon. He'd failed her by not having more faith in her from the beginning, maybe if he had she wouldn't have been killed. He didn't want to start thinking about that right now, he'd managed to go all day without dwelling on her death and how much he was missing her, 'Don't start wallowing now, or you won't stop!' He admonished himself sternly. Diverting his thoughts from her, he watched as the women ate in silence.

Sayid still couldn't believe the events of that afternoon. Sawyer and Jack finally fighting, Sawyer's indisputable victory, Jack's admission of defeat, who would have thought things would unfold like this? In all honesty, Sayid did not see getting the guns away from Sawyer as a priority or even a matter of concern. The redneck was less of threat when he was occupied, besides he wasn't the only one that had noticed the strained relationship between Jack and Locke. Part of that stemmed from the fact that between them, the two held all the power. It was better not to keep the guns with volatile leadership, and despite his many faults, Sawyer always seemed to know when it was best to use a gun. The dying Marshal, polar bear and even the raft served as prime examples that, indeed it was arguable that the Southerner was an obvious choice for such a responsibility. Sayid was interrupted from his thoughts by Kate getting up and placing her empty plate in the sink. The brunette washed her hands, then walked into the other room where the redneck was resting, drying her hands on her jeans as she went. Ana-Lucia sneered as she watched Kate walk away before shrugging and continuing her silent consumption of the delicious meal.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

James reclined on the couch in an exhausted state of consciousness, the food Sayid had cooked and given him had been delicious. Reminded him of Cajun cooking with the hint of spiciness; however some Tabasco wouldn't have gone awry as far as he was concerned. He thought back to the events of the day, hard to believe that he'd shared some intimate unguarded moments with her, witnessed a glimpse of what her life must be like beneath the mask when she'd had that nightmare, 'Heck, we even managed to squeeze in an argument in there too before the Doc came and ruined everything.'

He hated the fact that he'd been unable to control himself and had fought back. He respected Jack if for nothing else but how he'd managed to coordinate some form of rescue operation when they had crashed. Then of course the fact that Jack had saved his life a few times didn't lose him any points. Also, he'd met Christian in that bar in Sydney, before the nightmare began. Combined with the things the disgraced ex-Chief of Surgery had said about his son it had left a positive impression on James. ''Sides it's always good to keep on the better side of the man with the ability to save your life.' But this time he just hadn't been able to stop himself nor had he wanted to. His lip was starting to pulsate with a dull aching pain he couldn't bear. As he gently explored his lower lip to try and assess the damage, Kate walked into his line of vision.

"How does it feel?" She asked as she leaned forward to examine the wound herself. When she lifted his chin in order to take a closer look, he recoiled slightly, both of them felt the searing bolt of electricity that passed at the contact. James studied her face to gauge her reaction, but despite the flicker of recognition in her eyes he didn't get anything else from her.

Kate suppressed the chill that traveled down her spine as she felt his eyes searching her face. 'Whatever you do Kate don't you dare let him see that you felt that too.' From his physical reaction to the contact she knew he'd felt something. She had to steel herself from betraying just how naked and exposed she felt under that gaze. "Don't be a baby Sawyer, I just wanna take a look at your lip, can you lower it a little? I don't wanna hurt you, so if you can it will help." James closed his eyes as he forced himself to lower the throbbing lip, a few seconds later she let go of his chin.

"It's alright, but I think you should take some aspirin 'cause it looks pretty painful. Lucky for you, that's the worst of it." She left the rest of what she wanted to say unspoken but he heard her loud and clear. 'Unlike St. Jack, who would get a medal for bravery for standing up to the Resident Evil, and had the glaringly obvious battle scars to show for it.' Although he doubted she'd have called him St. Jack, unless she was going for a world record for surprising him today.

"Think, I walked away lightly do ya Freckles? I got physical evidence that proves otherwise." As he spoke he pulled his shirt up and sat up to show her the various bruises on his golden chest and back. Kate gasped, "Sawyer you've got a broken rib!" and she moved in closer to gingerly examine the rib in question. James winced upon the contact, "Easy, Sass, broken bones tend ta hurt!"

"Sorry, I didn't mean to press too hard. I'll be right back am gonna get something to bind you!" She said as she hurriedly ran off to the other room. James winced as he dragged himself into a sitting position.

When she came back in, Ana-Lucia was right behind her, a faint sneer gracing her luscious lips. "Hey, Hotlips, wanna help Florence bind me up nice an' tight?" His voice was loaded with innuendo, and he gave Ana-Lucia a look that dared her to say something right back. "No thanks, three's a crowd." The Latina deadpanned. 'She comes out swingin'!' James observed with amusement. "Somethin' I been tryin' to tell Sheera here for months." He said, teasingly. James heard her breath catch in indignation and flashed Ana-Lucia and Kate his dimples in response.

Kate applied a slight amount of extra pressure on his rib as she rolled the strips of cloth Jack had ripped up into makeshift for this exact kind of situation. James flinched, "Easy Sweetcheeks!" he yelped in a pain roughened voice. "Sorry." She apologized with her head down so as not to give away the laugh she was trying to suppress. James heard the laughter in her voice, "Hmm, sure you are." He observed dryly. He looked up at Ana-Lucia who had moved into the room a little more. "What's cookin' in that hot head of yours, Miha?" James asked, in a light manner. He could tell the wheels in Ana-Lucia's head were turning and something told him she would have something interesting to say.

"Kate, you're binding him too tight, here let me show you." Ana-Lucia virtually yanked the cloth from Kate's hands and proceeded to unravel it, subtly pushing Kate to the side in the process. James saw the resentment and anger flash in Kate's eyes at the action and prepared himself to enjoy the fireworks.

Kate got up from her kneeling position and let Ana-Lucia unwrap the bandages, she watched in disgust as James perused the other woman in that slow sexy way of his as she leaned over him with her cleavage in his face. "Somethin' they teach ya at the pig farm, Rambina?"

Ana-Lucia smiled at the nickname, "I gotta say I prefer that to Hotlips, and in response to your question no, I learnt this in Girl Scouts." Kate rolled her eyes at this revelation, 'Girl Scouts? Who did this bitch think she was kidding? Sawyer wouldn't swallow that kind of bullshit.'

"Really… I've always wanted to get to know a Girl Scout." James replied, smiling up at her, then as she kneeled down to tie a knot, James transferred his smile to Kate, who he looked at over Ana-Lucia's shoulder. Kate shot him daggers in response, arms crossed with an unimpressed look on her face.

"Come here Kate, this is how you bind broken ribs." Ana-Lucia called over her shoulder authoritatively. Kate bristled, unsuccessfully hiding her irritation, she walked over to the pair. "Last time I checked one broken rib didn't constitute _ribs_." She snapped. Ana-Lucia smiled at Kate as if butter wouldn't melt in her mouth, "I didn't peg you as a stickler for grammar. Besides, it's always good to be thorough…just in case." James raised his eyebrows at this, his eyes showing not only his mirth but did Kate also see a touch of admiration for Ana-Lucia?

"Well, I guess you would know all about being thorough, huh?" Kate shot back. It was now Ana-Lucia's turn to bristle. They both knew Kate was referring to Ana-Lucia's mistaken and hasty shooting of Shannon. Ana-Lucia muttered something under her breath in Spanish, James' eyes widened in amused shock. "Ana-Lucia, you surprise me." He teased. She turned around to look at him, "You speak Spanish?" Kate looked down at James in surprise, as he responded, "Yeah I speak Spanish, Querida (translation: sweetheart) why do ya sound so surprised?"

"No reason, I guess you and I will have to talk about how it is exactly that you came to speak fluent Spanish." Ana-Lucia spoke to James like it was only the two of them in the room and to Kate's irritation; he didn't seem to notice her either.

"It's a date, Mamacita." James replied as Ana-Lucia walked out of the room, not even bothering to say anything to Kate.

Kate studied Sawyer, warily, "Do you really speak Spanish? Or did you just take an educated guess as to what she might have said?" James' eyes twinkled with mischief, "Why Sass, you wanna know what she said?" Kate snorted dismissively as she uncrossed her arms and sat down on the couch next to him, "As if I care what she has to say about me! I know you were conning me at the time, but I still think you were onto something when you mentioned her and Jack's army. I don't trust her."

James winced when she brought up the Long con he'd pulled on her last week, but he did turn slightly to look at her as she spoke. "Tell ya what, I don't call her Rambina for nothin' that's for sure." He said in response to her statement.

"Really? I thought you were being ironic, Tex." Kate replied sarcastically, the smile on her face taking the edge off the sarcasm. They stared at each other for a while, and as the intensity of the gaze grew, the smiles on their faces faded away. Kate swallowed before biting her lip nervously in an unconscious act of sensuality, when James' gaze fell onto her lips she realized her mistake. A thrill of excitement flared deep inside her. She was transfixed by the intensity of his gaze on her lips and when his eyes moved back up to her face, she didn't react fast enough to hide that the moment was having a similar effect on her as it was having on him.

James inwardly groaned at the tension growing between them, as they sat and stared at each other. It was frustrating to no end knowing that even if the usual barriers weren't stopping him, the pain in his swollen lip was doing a fine job in their place. His eyes stroked her face with a force that was almost physical, and as his eyes raked down the rest of her body then back up he couldn't help but notice the gooseflesh that she had no way of hiding.

"Good evening!" Locke greeted cheerfully as entered the room, his eyes missing nothing of the situation when he entered the room. Kate tore her eyes away from James gratefully, jumping up like she had been scalded. "Hi John, you back for another shift?" She overcompensated, putting some much needed distance between her and James.

Locke perused James for signs of injury, "Where's Jack? Is he badly hurt?" Locke asked, as he strode towards the bunker, Kate trailed behind him eagerly without giving James a second glance. He had remained seated on the couch, an unbidden wave of disappointment washing over him, sighing; he closed his eyes and lay back on the couch. 'Here we go again.' He thought to himself bitterly.


	7. Chapter 7

**CowboyswithDimples** thank you for the review, 'tis my job as the writer to hopefully change your opinion on the AL front. I think she will be an effective tool in the SKATE development bear with me and you'll see where I am going with this I hope.

**Chapter 7**

Kate woke up first thing that morning, the discomfort of sleeping on the hatch floor causing her muscles to protest stiffly at the treatment she'd subjected them to. She turned around and looked over to the sleeping man above her. She couldn't help but smile at the way his long form hung off the end of the couch, one leg resting on the floor while the other was propped against the arm rest. He also had one arm flung above his head while the other hung limply on the floor. It always came as a surprise to her that he didn't snore, in fact he slept so quietly and peacefully she had to strain to hear him breathing and if it had not been for the consistent rise and fall of his chest she would have been worried.

She frowned at herself as she remembered yesterday, as a whole she had been far too forward, practically begging him with her body to take her into his arms and give her what they both wanted. It was something that had started on that very first trek into the jungle when she pretended not to know how to dismantle the gun she'd taken from him.

Kate sat up and observed his sleeping form a little longer. 'I'm just checking for signs of new bruising or previously undiscovered injuries from yesterday.' She told herself unconvincingly, Kate did not want to think that she actually enjoyed the freedom watching him when no one else was around, gave her.

"Morning." Croaked Jack as he shuffled into the room, with a mug of coffee in his hand, the surgeon had a limp and his face was a mélange of yellow, green, blue, and purple. 'Jesus, he looks worse than he did yesterday.' Kate thought to herself.

"Watching him sleep? I'm the one who got my face rearranged Kate." Jack joked half-heartedly. Kate suppressed the guilty feeling she felt at that remark. Shaking her head she got up and faced Jack, "You're surprisingly chipper for someone who is allegedly more deserving of my attention than Sawyer." She smiled tentatively at Jack as she walked up to him in order to examine his face. "Does it hurt much?"

"Depends what you would define as much. On a scale of 1 to 10 I would say it's at a steady 25. Tell you what we should have done, should have sent _him_ to fight Ethan that first time when he kicked my ass." Kate shook her head at Jack's good spirits, slightly confused as to why the surgeon was joking about Sawyer like they were friends or something.

"We'll, hell Doc' if I'd known all it took was an ass whuppin' to dislodge that stick up your ass I woulda done it sooner." James quipped as he sat up with a grunt. Jack smiled at James sarcastically, "My nurse overdosed me on painkillers this morning and I am not my usual self this morning."

"Ah so, stick's still in place, huh, well, as long as you're still in pain, I'm happy." James stood up shaking his hair out of his eyes. "You sure she wasn't tryin' to put ya out of your misery permanently, you look worse than you did yesterday. 'Sides sympathy ain't Rambina's strong point, interferes with the sneer." Kate's breath hissed out and she frowned at James with annoyance. "Sawyer, enough."

James gave her a once over with his customary accompanying smirk, "Mornin' to ya too Florence, if you didn't wanna sleep on the floor you coulda hopped onto the couch with me." Kate gave him a look of genuine disgust, "Then maybe ya wouldn't be so testy this mornin'…unless you're holdin' onto Jackie boy's stick for him." He finished off this sentence with a reciprocal disgusted look at Kate before he sauntered to the bathroom.

Kate turned to Jack rolling her eyes, to her surprise Jack was actually smiling in reaction to what Sawyer had said. "He's funny, I'll give him that." Kate sighed, "Why don't you sit down on the couch Jack, you're practically high." Jack allowed himself to be led to the couch. Locke and Ana-Lucia strolled into the room both bearing mugs of coffee. "Morning Sleepyhead." Ana-Lucia said to Kate, although she sounded innocent enough, there was a challenge in her voice that Kate recognized.

"Morning Hotlips, you overdosed Jack, were you being _thorough_ again?" Kate asked the other woman sweetly. She had to suppress a bubble of laughter when Ana-Lucia choked on her coffee and tried to cough discreetly into her mug. Locke reached over to thump her on the back, and Kate let a little giggle out as she walked past the two of them to get herself some coffee.

In the kitchen she realized she hadn't brushed her teeth yet nor washed her face, picking up her backpack she headed to the bathroom. She nearly collided with James as he pulled the door open when she reached for the handle. "Sonofa-…Damn it Freckles I got a broken rib here!"

"Sorry, I wasn't thinking." She apologized sincerely. James hadn't missed the smile on her face that had disappeared somewhere between his opening the door and their near collision a split second later. "You get your daily fix of Jacko? Is that why you're all smiles an' head in the clouds?" James couldn't keep the bitterness out of his voice as he asked her this.

The unreadable mask came up like an invisible curtain on Kate's face, "Just get out of my way Sawyer, I don't have all day." Kate surprised herself at the brusqueness of her tone. 'Whatever, he goes around insulting all and sundry 24/7, so why should I feel guilty?' Although despite herself she did, 'Well he'd insulted her and Jack in almost the same breath, and flirted with Ana-Lucia… enough said.' Kate closed the door in his face with excessive force.

James walked back towards the kitchen, he poured himself a cup of coffee, took a sip, then spewed the coffee all over the sink as the hot liquid made contact with his stitches. 'Sonofabitch! This was all her fault. She blows hot and cold so much I think I'll be dead from over-exposure before she ever decides between the two of us!' James had a feeling that despite everything his fight with Jack had finally elevated him to at least a fighting chance for the fugitive's affections. He wondered if she even realized herself that she was seeing him in a less negative light. 'Probably not, selfish bitch still thinks the sun rises and sets with Jack.' James poured the remainder of the coffee down the sink in despair, his lip was throbbing and so was his rib and trying to decipher Kate's mixed signals was starting to make his headache.

When Kate went back into the computer room, she found herself alone with Jack. "Where is everybody?"

"Locke will be back in ten minutes he went to get something from outside, Sawyer and Ana-Lucia have gone back to the beach. Two of them were chattering in Spanish, did you know Sawyer spoke Spanish?" Jack shook his head then groaned in pain as the action rattled his hard-earned oasis of less pain.

"Not until last night I didn't." Kate said shortly. She'd come out of the shower intending to apologize to Sawyer and he'd bailed with Officer Sneer. 'I don't care if they flirt, I've been dying for Sawyer to focus his Southern charms on someone willing.' Even as she thought it, the hollow echo of untruth reverberated in her head.

Jack was lying back on the sofa his eyes closed, "Kate are you jealous of Ana-Lucia getting close to Sawyer?" Kate's nostrils flared at the mention of the former cop's name. "Of course not, can't think of two people better matched." She congratulated herself on how normal she'd sounded as she said this. She glanced down at Jack who seemed to have fallen asleep. She shrugged and went to sit at the computer, in an unconscious mimic of James' pose the day before she put her feet up and picked up Moll Flanders.

**On the beach**

James was glad to be back on the beach in the open, and more importantly out of that blasted hatch. Ana-Lucia walked up to him from the water's edge, and he gritted his teeth in frustration. The woman was relentless, grilling him all the way from the hatch to the beach with questions to test his fluency in Spanish. And when she'd realized he spoke the language better than she did, she'd began interrogating him on how he'd come to spend so much time in Latin America in order to learn to speak like that.

And now it was late afternoon and she was back to pester him about his past. 'Damn it James you and your big mouth, look at this mess now. Girl's smart she just might figure it out in time.'

"When you said you've lived in Guatemala and Panama I asked myself what would a man like Sawyer be doing there in the mid to late eighties and early nineties. Then I figured it out, Sawyer wouldn't be doing anything there but James Ford would." Ana-Lucia smiled with self-satisfaction as James kept his face studiously blank. "Drugs or prostitution I haven't narrowed it down yet." James breathed a sigh of relief, she was way off base. Ana-Lucia smiled at him, as she waved and abruptly walked away.

"Think I scared her away?" Kate asked hopefully, as she stopped in front of James. He looked down at her and braced himself for some more of her special brand of vitriol that she sometimes used on him. His rib hurt more than normal because he had gone for what he'd hoped would be a fortifying swim in the ocean. And his lip was starting to throb as the salt from the water did its job keeping the wound disinfected. He was still smarting from her hostility this morning and after a morning of harassment from Ana-Lucia he simply wasn't in the mood.

"Whatcha want, Kate?" Her eyes widened at the use of her actual name, she had really fallen out of favor with him since Lady Sneeralot had started putting the moves on _her_ Southerner. "I just came to check on your injuries, Sawyer." Kate inwardly cringed, she hadn't meant to sound so brisk.

"Shouldn't you be checkin' up on the Doc? _He_ needs your help more than I do." With a nod of dismissal in her direction he headed for the flap of his tent, Kate followed him inside. She didn't want to part on a bad note and his dismissal of her hurt.

"If it's all the same I'd rather take a look." James turned around in surprise and smirked, "To be thorough?" Kate nodded, recognizing the dig for what it was. He was telling her he was well aware that the comment and the context it was initially made in had bothered her more than she would care to admit.

As she leaned in to look at his lip in the fast fading light he couldn't help but notice the sun's rays crowning her head with gold. 'Great all I need is symbolism, like this damn Island isn't symbolic enough. Shakespeare would look like a charlatan in comparison to this place.'

The smell of shampoo and ocean and Kate all mingled to form an intoxicating perfume and James had to restrain himself from smelling her hair. 'Damn…here we go again.' Suddenly he felt a burning anger towards her and the more he thought about it the brighter it burned.

Kate leaned into him, bending her knees slightly as she reached forward in order to unravel the bandage Ana-Lucia had tied the night before. James grabbed her hand tightly, forcing her to stop and look at him.

"Why are you _really_ here? Is this another trick, huh? Don't even think about lyin' to me Kate." She looked into his eyes glowing with red hot coals of anger and something else. Kate felt a thrill rushing through her blood at the affirmation his question gave her that she could still affect him in _that_ way.

They stared at each other, James could see the internal debate going through her mind as she decided how to answer. Finally, when he was just about ready to throw her out, she replied, "I wanted to apologize for the way I treated you this morning." That was _one_ of the reasons she was here, so technically she wasn't lying.

"Liar."

"I am not lying, Sawyer."

The use of his alias made the anger burn hotter than ever, "I don't believe you, if you really wanna apologize to me, why dontcha tell me the truth for a change? Otherwise get the hell outta ma tent and stop wastin' ma goddamn time." His grip on her wrist hadn't relaxed and Kate felt her pulse racing at the proximity between them and the thrill the blaze in his eyes gave her.

"Fine you don't believe me, ask me something else, and I'll tell you the truth. Anything you want to ask me, ask me."

James didn't even pause for a second, "What was the dream about yesterday, the one that had me strugglin' not to slap you 'cause I'd run out ideas on how to wake you?" Without flinching or blinking, Kate responded in a deadly calm voice, "It wasn't a dream it was a memory."

"Memory of _what_?" Kate didn't answer she simply stared at him, he slid his hand up her arm and shook it, "Memory of what Freckles?" He'd called her Freckles again! Kate was sickened by the relief she felt. She chose not to analyze this and taking a deep breath, plunged head on into the unknown territory of sharing her past.

"When I was eight years old, my stepfather built a steel cage on our farm for the dogs he wanted to keep. It was behind the barn, exposed to the elements, but hidden from view. One night he was drunk and he locked me in it and forgot about it for 3 days. My mother was away and I was trapped in it for 3 days and 4 nights. The morning of the 4th day he unlocked the cage, I was starving, dehydrated and unable to walk, luckily for me it had poured with rain the second and third day. He made me promise not tell anyone otherwise he'd put me back in the cage. When I was older it was either I let him lock me in there at night or he'd beat my Mom. That's what the nightmare was about."

The shock, horror and outrage mingled on his face surprised Kate, she'd always thought if she ever told anyone they'd say she was lying or crazy. Nothing could have prepared her for what James did next. "C'mere." He whispered, his voice husky with emotion as he pulled her into his arms and held her tight.

Like it was the most natural thing in the world, Kate melted into the embrace burying her face into his chest. She inhaled his scent and felt comforted and safe. How could someone just holding you make you feel safe? She wasn't going to analyze it she was just going to let herself be… like any other normal female in the arms of a handsome man would.

James was in shock as he tried to assimilate this horrible snapshot that was a part of Kate's _life_. A multitude of questions swirled angrily in his head and after he'd calmed himself down enough to control his anger at the kind of man that would do that to a little girl, he asked the one thing he needed to know. "Was this sorry excuse for a human being, Wayne?"

Kate stiffened in his arms at the mention of that name, before nodding silently into his shoulder. James nodded, then, he asked her a second question that he regretted as the words tumbled out of his mouth.

"This is the guy _I_ remind you of?"

Kate grudgingly pulled out of his embrace, searching his face, she was shocked to see disappointment prevalent. Opening her mouth, she willed herself to say something… anything… but there were no words and both of them knew it.


	8. Chapter 8

Okay, two things, one I hate the way the writers of the show make Our James seem like just plain old scum of the earth, so I have come up with the flesh to add to his backstory that I think is fitting without being over the top.

Second thing, the "You want everyone to hate you." Line Kate always throws at him on the show doesn't hold water with me so I am going to explore what I believe are his motivations.

**CowboyswithDimples**, you read and review my chapters so fast I'm kind of forced to write another one asap! Keep it up girl, otherwise goodness knows how often I would have updated the story!

**Chapter 8**

"Well?"

Kate felt the cold that his arms had banished return with a vengeance. The look of horror on his face at the comparison, was severing the bond they'd forged over the last two days and as if from outside her body, she could see the light from him fading away and leaving her alone in the dark. She genuinely did not know how to deal with this new development; she'd hoped that he had been too out of it to realize the things she'd said. At his next words her hopes were completely crushed when he said, "How do you believe he was a part of you Kate?"

Kate shuddered in disgust at those words, and searched for the words she could say to him to make this issue go away. 'There's an elephant in the living room, what are you going to do? What are you going to say? It's not like you can continue to just say nothing. You started this truth-telling and now you have to finish this.'

James was watching Kate as she inhaled and exhaled deeply, the pain that consumed him as he felt their tentative bond of a few minutes before stretch and break, was going to kill him. 'She thinks I am some kind of monster. Despite everything she doesn't see me for who I really am.' His heart was shattering into a thousand little jagged pieces, she was driving him away with her silence and he couldn't stop the tidal wave of hurt that swept them away from each other.

He watched with detached interest as she rose from between his knees where she'd been half sitting when he'd held her. He didn't have the strength or the will to stop her as she stood in front of his sprawled legs, not even looking at him anymore. He knew she wasn't going to answer his questions and quite frankly he didn't care anymore. He wanted her to leave so he could cradle his injured feelings in peace and quiet.

"I discovered he wasn't my stepfather, but in fact he was my biological father. The man I called Daddy and who is my father in my heart of hearts was someone else my Mom married when she was pregnant with me." She had told him the truth but skirted the issue of the Wayne/Sawyer comparison.

"Good night." She said it over her shoulder, walking out of the tent and leaving a wounded James sitting in the dark.

As she strode away from his tent Kate walked over to her own tent, when she got inside she let the tears of guilt, frustration and sadness fall. She sobbed her heart out in the tent craving the emotional detachedness she usually felt… it was a lot less painful than this.

James lay back, not moving from where she had left him, and wished he was someone else. 'Well that's that.' He thought bitterly, and wished himself in a bar somewhere, so he could drown out the pain in a much needed bottle of whisky. When had everything become so irreparably fucked up? When had he fallen so far in his quest not to care about anything or anyone that he'd started to resemble an incestuous pedophilic monster of a man? And how did this image of him reconcile with the other image of a tortured man who wanted everyone to hate him as she thought he was? His head started to ache along with his chest and lip as tried to decipher the workings of Kate's mind.

Eventually he rose from his position on the floor, finding his cigarettes he walked out of his tent and built a fire with the remainder of his firewood. Hunkering down into the sand he lit a cigarette, despite the discomfort it caused his lip. Stubbing it out half smoked, James stared into the flames, carefully emptying his mind of thoughts of Kate, thoughts of himself, everything until all that existed was a bright burning flame in his mind. James crossed his long legs and relaxed his body. Regulating his breathing with a conscious effort to breathe in deeply and out again, he could feel the beach and the Island itself recede as he reached that higher plane of meditation the shaman had taught him many years ago.

Ana-Lucia had returned from checking on Jack at the hatch to see James sitting in front of a dying fire, staring into it like he was somewhere else. The Southerner intrigued her, and seeing him sitting peacefully, in what she recognized as a state of deep meditation, she realized something that had been eluding her all day. The mystery of who he was, unraveled in her mind like a spool of yarn. Something the man had said to her in Spanish earlier had teased an elusive memory in her mind and now she realized what it was.

Operating on an intuitive hunch she went and sat down next to him, waiting for him to acknowledge her presence. "Para él consistimos en dar ese recibimos; consiste en pardoning ese nosotros pardoned; y consiste en morir ese nosotros se lleva a la vida eterna." _(Translation : For it is in giving that we receive; it is in pardoning that we are pardoned; and it is in dying that we are born to eternal life.)_

James, straightened up to look at her, in surprise, "Yeah, I too am full of surprises." She smiled at him knowingly. James wasn't sure whether he should be worried that she had finished off the Prayer of St. Francis he'd learned many years ago in a Nicaraguan village. Well it wasn't the most obscure of prayers probably pretty popular nowadays so he wasn't going to think anything of it, just yet.

Ana-Lucia knew it! He had recited the first half of the prayer that she'd heard once before in a village 40 miles from Léon, Nicaragua when she was in her teens. If he knew that passage he must have spent some time there, and the only foreigners that spent enough time in that village to learn that passage by heart were aid workers!

"You're El Cocinero aren't you? I knew your name and face were pre-Island familiar." Ana-Lucia pressed. James raised his eyebrows at her, "Now what would make you think that?"

"My second cousin Diego, he's got pictures of Los Primeros at his house in Antigua. And there's a picture of a much younger version of you wearing a chef's hat, standing outside a huge tent near Angel Falls with him, your brother Travis and my cousin Catalina." James sighed giving up the pretence that he didn't know what she was talking about. 'Well I'll be damned, of all the places to run into a relation of Diego's this takes the prize.' He couldn't even muster the energy to rail at the Fates that had added this particular twist.

"You a bit disappointed I'm not a drug dealing pimp?" He asked her teasingly. Ana-Lucia was staring at him with a deep and abiding respect now. 'Damn it, she gonna start talking about the past?'

"No, not at all. I am just pleasantly surprised. Diego and Catalina always spoke about those days and you with so much love and affection. What I don't understand is how you've become such a bitter and selfish man." She spoke bluntly as always. "What happened to you James? The man my cousins spoke of, he was brave and giving, had a heart the size of Texas and could cook a mean enchilada."

"I can still cook a mean enchilada, Hotlips."

"Yeah, but, you spent years living in mud huts, trekking through unforgiving jungle, making a difference… and now…" Ana-Lucia broke off in frustrated confusion. "Now you alienate people, don't do anything or care about anyone except for yourself…and maybe Kate." He seethed in annoyance at the mention of her name, but other than that his face and eyes remained blank.

"People change Rambina, I'm pretty sure if you used to spend time with Diego an' Catalina you're not the same person you are today." He spoke like a man, who'd seen and lived through too much.

"Me? Nah, I've always been a people charmer." She replied jokingly. He smiled faintly at that. They sat in awkward silence for a few minutes, then Ana-Lucia turned to him and asked him the question she knew would finally get a real reaction out of him.

"Is it because of what happened to Catalina? Is that why you've become like this? A shell of the man you once were? 'Cause I think-"

"Don't you _dare_ think you know _anythin_' about it! Or me for that matter." He cut her off viciously. James' nostrils were flaring and his voice and body were shaking with violent emotion. Getting up, he looked down at the former cop, his stance threatening, she drew back in consternation. "Word of advice Rambina, don't poke your nose where it don't belong…it just might get cut off, or worse. This ain't HellAy, and you certainly ain't no cop here." That said he stalked off into the jungle leaving Ana-Lucia to stare after him in fear at the way he'd looked at her, a mixture of loathing and violence simmering just beneath the surface.

Unbeknownst to them a very interested Zeke had watched them from his hiding place in the trees. As he melted back into the shadows and followed James a thoughtful look crossed his face.


	9. Chapter 9

Thank you all for the reviews! This chapter is moving things along now… it is now the night before **Dave (s. 2, ep. 18)** so all the things that happened with the **tree frog, Lockdown**, etc have happened. Kate hasn't gone off into the jungle yet with Jack, and just imagine Jack's face being bruised still. For those of you who have seen **Dave** you'll understand the hot air balloon reference, and for those who haven't don't worry! Sawyer says he saw the balloon drop the night before when everyone else is all like, 'where did this come from?' That is all.

**Chapter 9**

James sat high up in the tree watching the camp in a thoughtful silence. His ribs still hurt but his lip was almost completely healed now. He had asked Sun for a herbal remedy to stop the pain and the Korean beauty had made him a poultice to apply on the wound that had worked wonders. He also had a crick in his neck that would not go away because after his conversation with Ana-Lucia the day before yesterday he had resorted to sleeping in the abandoned Commie Caves just to get away from everyone.

James had a suspicious feeling someone had followed him there but he had been far too pre-occupied to care. Now he sat up in the tree surveying the camp and doing his best not to think about the dream he had last night. Against his will all he could do was relive the dream all the same.

He'd seen her, Catalina and she had been standing alone at the entrance of the caves, crying her heart out. When he'd asked her what was wrong she'd replied, "You promised me Jamie, I believed you and you broke your promise." When he had tried to go to her and hold her, she had run away into the jungle, and as he chased her retreating figure he'd stumbled on something. He hadn't managed to look at it properly but it looked like a discarded wig and beard, James had run as long as he could before collapsing in an exhausted heap calling out Catalina's name. She had turned around to look at him over her shoulder, then somehow disappeared behind what appeared to be a mountain wall. James looked around him in surprise as he realized the foliage and terrain was different from anything else he had seen on the Island. Getting painfully to his feet he had run up to the spot she'd disappeared behind. As he studied it he realized that it was a secret entrance, pushing it in he was shocked to see a virtual paradise unfold before his eyes. It was a valley, with carefully tended gardens of vegetables and trees that formed an orchard. At the edge of the valley was a camp. As James tried to take it all in he saw a man that looked very much like Zeke without the beard and eyebrows enter a hatch that was underground. He stared in surprise as Catalina stood at the spot where Zeke had disappeared under, she was looking at him expectantly, "Do something Jamie, you promised me." He shook his head with fear, she'd get caught! "Cat come here please, just come back to me." He whispered desperately. Catalina shook her head in disagreement. "No! You promised me! You promised me!" She was screaming at him and as he watched her in horror fearing for her safety, a wind picked up from nowhere and started to blow around them. The wind carried Catalina's voice to him then away as she disappeared with the valley, leaving James standing in the dark on his own.

"Catalina!" With that cry he'd woken up with a start to find himself sweating and alone in the CommieCaves.

James was racking his brain trying to understand what the dream had meant. 'Damn Rambina, this is all her fault.' If she hadn't brought up Diego and Catalina he wouldn't have dreamt her, wearing white and more beautiful than ever. James felt his chest contract with pain as he thought of his beautiful Cat. Before he could dwell on the past any further, Kate walked up to the trunk of the tree James was in. 'Oh great, I was wondering what could make this day any more disastrous, thank you Lord for bein' so kind as to bring her here.'

Kate looked up at him in the tree before climbing it and positioning herself next to him. She didn't say a word, just looked out at the camp as he had done earlier. James didn't say anything either and the tension between them built up to the point that either one of them was going to say something or suffocate in silence.

"What are we looking at?" Kate asked, finally breaking the unbearable silence between them. James tsked in frustration, "Something I can help ya with, Freckles or did you just run out of people to annoy?"

Kate nodded slightly at his question, "You still bitter about losing the poker game to Jack?"

"Nah, lucky for the Doc I don't bear grudges."

Kate turned around to look at him incredulously, "_You_ don't bear grudges Sawyer?"

"I'm talkin' to _you_ ain't I?"

"Touché." Kate said in a funny voice. James looked at her expectantly, wondering what she was doing here.

"I guess I didn't really think yesterday counted because Hurley was around, although I have to say it was a little awkward at first. I am sorry Sawyer. I'm sorry I-"

"Let's not talk about this Kate, if it's all the same to ya, I'd rather not." She nodded in agreement, slightly relieved that she didn't have to open that can of worms just yet. The silence between them now wasn't so heavy. There were still many unsaid words hanging over them but they were like old friends as opposed to malevolent spirits.

"So Ana-Lulu tells me Jack and Locke have got themselves a genuine prisoner of war." Kate looked at him in surprise, not that he knew about Henry but that Ana-Lucia had told him.

"You and Ana-Lucia are buxom buddies now?" James sat up a little straighter he had noticed the carefully casual tone in her voice as she asked him that question.

"Whatsa matter Katie, you jealous?"

Kate smiled and shook her head slightly, "No… I just don't understand what you and Jack see in her. I mean both of you talk to her and seem to respect her. Am I the only one who remembers she _shot_ Shannon? Dead!"

James studied her face, "Some people would say the same about you… and poisoning Michael. Or Locke and what happened to Boone, hell even Sayid and torturin' me. Aww shucks, I forgot, the only one who cares 'bout that is you."

Kate looked at him in surprise, "I didn't poison Michael." James noticed she didn't disagree that she cared about him.

"I hear what you're sayin' Freckles but your eyes tell me somethin' different. Either you did it yourself or ya had somethin' to do with it at the very least. I'm guessin' your girlfriend Tokyo Rose the herbalist coulda been persuaded to poison Chewie in order to stop him from leaving. Or maybe it was Mickey himself she didn't want to leave the Island. Either way it woulda worked for you." Kate's eyes widened at his astute observation, the man was much smarter than anyone gave him credit for.

"You've made your point Tex." She conceded.

"Does Jacko know?"

Kate shook her head, James nodded in understanding, "Didn't think so. Don't worry Freckles, your position as head nurse is safe."

Kate looked at him gratefully, making James slightly angry at how eager she was to please the spinal surgeon.

"I'm tired of sittin' in this damn tree, gonna go for a walk, ya comin'?" As he asked the question James was already climbing down the tree.

Kate followed suit and smiled her acceptance of the invitation. Smiling at each other the two set off, walking side by side into the jungle.

They ended up at the waterfall they had discovered a month ago, and just like the last time they decided to go for a swim. Sitting on the rocks the pair dried off naturally in the fading afternoon light. Kate watched James through her lashes, trying to this side of his personality with the man that had stolen the guns and beaten Jack to a bloody pulp.

'He's so mercurial! Everything he does, is with so much passion…except for conning That he does cold-bloodedly, I wonder why?'

"Somethin' on your mind Sweetcheeks?" Kate looked at James guiltily. He snickered at the attractive blush creeping onto her cheeks.

"I know when I am being watched Sugar, especially when I am being stared at."

"I wasn't staring!"

"I'm the one who's bein' stared at! I'll be the judge of that."

"Okay fine whatever, yeah I was staring at you."

"No matter how hard you try you just can't help yourself can ya?" James was teasing her but he knew he hit a nerve when her smile faltered for an instant.

"Actually, I was wondering why you con people Sawyer. You obviously don't enjoy it. So why continue to do it?"

James frowned in response to this question, it was a little too observant and with the events of the last few days it was like ripping the band aid off a half-healed wound.

"What makes you think I don't like doin' it Freckles?"

"I can tell." She spoke confidently like she had him figured out.

"Is that a fact? Well lemme ask ya this Sass, what makes you think you're not bein' conned now?" 'That shut her up' James thought with satisfaction.

"We should get back to the beach." She spoke as she stood up and pulled her jeans on. For a moment James regretted the words that had brought on this change in her, but he squashed that inner voice that made him feel bad. He got up too and buttoning up his shirt he followed her briskly retreating figure back to the beach.

That night he had the dream of Catalina again, when he woke he left the tent and stood in the trees enjoying a cigarette and trying to still his rapidly beating heart. Ambling off into the jungle he saw the hot air balloon of food drop into the trees. Cursing he walked up to it in an attempt to figure out what it was about. When he saw it was food he lumbered down onto his haunches to get a better look. The hairs on the back of his neck started to stand on end of their own volition, turning sharply, what he saw made a cold hand of fear clutch his heart. Catalina! Standing in the trees looking straight at him with a disappointed look on her face, "You promised me Jamie." The words were whispered but still audible, before he could even make a move towards her she turned away and dissolved into the trees. James took off at a run, his heart thumping loudly in his chest. A few minutes later he accepted the fact that he'd lost her, she was gone.

Walking back to his tent he saw Kate and Jack walking through the jungle towards the beach too. They were talking animatedly in hushed whispers and Jack was smiling at something she said. Turning around to walk back to his tent the long way around, James swore under his breath.

Kate was going through her clothes, looking for things to take on her trek into the jungle with Jack tomorrow. It wasn't definite but it was pretty much a given that they were going. She smiled to herself, happy to be doing something. She couldn't stand being still for too long, her defenses weakened and it was harder to keep the demons at bay. Most importantly the nightmare she'd had the other day was lingering at the edges of her consciousness and she felt like she was fighting a losing battle to stop it from recurring. She needed this, needed to occupy her mind with other thoughts. She couldn't afford to fall apart or worse now!

'What's worse Kate? Worse than memories of things you'd rather not think about?' She taunted herself, knowing full well a trek into the jungle also meant some distance between her and Sawyer, which if she was to be honest was what she really needed. Somehow, the Southerner could crack the façade with a look, a gesture, a word. With him all kinds of emotions came up to the surface, he was like a bowl of fish-hooks, she picked one up and they all came rushing forward with it. That's why it was best to leave well enough alone.

With Jack it was different, he gave her something to strive for, she wanted to be the kind of woman he would be proud to have by his side. Real doctor's wife material, someone Tom could have stayed married to. Someone who would never get her best friend killed because she wasn't selfish enough to care only about herself. Someone who hadn't deprived the Marshal's wife and kids of their father forever, because he'd been hunting her down and ended up in a plane crash. Someone who didn't have murder in her heart, and had destroyed anything good she came across. Someone who didn't have a person like Wayne for a father. At this thought she couldn't help but think of him, too. 'Where does he fit into all this? Everyone looks at him like he's scum, but he's nothing like Wayne. He's me in ten years time or maybe even less, if I don't change.' Not really aware of what she was doing, Kate stood up and walked out of her tent. 'I have to tell him he's nothing like Wayne. Tell him that I am sorry I ever thought that. I have to make him understand that nothing can ever happen between us. He's not part of the plan, part of my future, if we ever get off this Island.'

She walked into his tent without warning and ground to a halt when she saw him sitting in the dark wide awake. They stared at each other, her heart was beating so loud she couldn't hear anything else. Everything she wanted to say to him froze in her mind as she watched him rise from his sitting position.

He stopped a foot away from her his searing gaze lighting her entire being on fire. She saw him open his mouth to speak and without thinking she lunged forward, grabbing his face and kissing him passionately.

James was floored, he wasn't expecting her to do that! He kissed her back with passionate fervor, their tongues tussling in the age old dance of a kiss. Kate moaned into his mouth, pressing herself against him so hard he lost his balance. The two of them tumbled onto the tent floor, but she didn't stop kissing him. James rolled her over so that he was on top of her, pausing to look into her eyes before he resumed their kiss. They were making love with their tongues, and James felt like the heat their kiss was generating would burn him alive.

She was writhing and undulating beneath him, making him forget about the pain in his rib and concentrate on the torturous pleasure he felt elsewhere. He pulled away from her and she grabbed his hair pushing his head back down to her so she could crush her lips against his. There was fire in her kiss but the force of it bordered on violence and James instinctively knew what she wanted. Kate rolled over on top of him and as she straddled him she clenched her thighs so tightly around his torso that he thought his rib would break again. When he rolled on top of her this time he held her arms above her head in a bruising grip that also stretched them to their limits. James saw the blaze in her eyes burn brighter as she relaxed slightly and strained to kiss him again.

When he lowered his head towards her she kissed him hungrily and hard, the combination of her breathing, the welcoming hot cradle created by her raised knees that were clutching him hungrily and her guttural moans that he swallowed in order to stop others from hearing drove him over the edge of his self-control. He slid his hands down her torso and she shook with anticipation as his fingers fumbled at the buttons on her jeans. Rising up on her elbows she ripped his shirt off and flung it to the side, James raised his eyebrows at her in teasing question at the violence of the action. "I take it you don't like that shirt on me."

She responded by pulling her own shirt over her head before she started to unbutton his jeans with a frantic eagerness. James was going to expire on the very spot, the friction of her fingers against his groin as she searched for the zipper was bringing him that much closer to crazy. She groaned with pleasure when she discovered he wasn't wearing anything underneath the jeans. Taking control of the situation again James grabbed her wrists and forced them up above her head again. When he lowered himself into the welcoming silk of her thighs she arched her back and hissed in ecstasy. He plunged inside her violently, and kissed her hard as she moaned into his mouth, he lay there relishing the feel of being inside her for a second. It felt like his mind was splintering into a million pieces he had no coherent thought left and when she started to move against him in a provocative, excruciatingly rhythm he knew he was lost.

Kate wanted to lose herself in this feeling, this relinquishment of control, she alsoinvited and craved the pain he was inflicting on her arms and wrists as he held them above her head. She wasn't anything or anyone just the feeling. She tightened her hold on him and felt him groan in response, she was whispering words of encouragement that she knew would help her get what she wanted from him. He too was losing control and it made her dizzy with ecstasy as he increased the tempo pumping into her so hard she could feel her buttocks chafing on the pile of clothes she was lying on.

She was whispering words into his ear, words he hadn't thought she even knew let alone was capable of uttering throatily as she was doing now. She squeezed him so hard he felt a pleasure that could almost be described as pain. He could die from this.

Gasping with effort James drove into her one last time both of them tumbling over the edge of ecstasy into brief oblivion. Stars danced behind her eyes and she lay there, sprawled beneath him, her body shaking with the force of her release.

Too soon, she was back on earth and the reality of what they had just done hit her like a splash of cold water across the face. Sitting up quickly she looked at him as he lay next to her with growing distaste spreading on her face.

James looked up at the expression on her face and had a pretty good idea of what was going to happen next. Deliberately making himself act nonchalant he said in a sated, gravelly voice, "You bit ma shoulder, Sass."

She was already drawing on her bra and shirt, "Don't you dare tell anyone about this!" she hissed angrily at him. Then pulling herself up to a kneeling position she hauled her jeans over her hips, buttoning them hastily. Her fingers were shaking and she swore in frustration at the length of time it was taking her to get out of Sawyer's tent. The Southerner was sitting up now, he'd buttoned up his jeans and was watching her in fascination as she struggled with her clothing.

When she finished she got up off her knees and without saying a word ran out of his tent.


	10. Chapter 10

Hey guys this chapter is short but don't worry! Honestly, this story is telling itself.

**Chapter 10**

Kate sneaked back into her tent, glad for the fact that everyone was asleep, when she got back into her tent she looked at the time in surprise, 3 am.

She sat on the floor thinking about what she had just done. She'd slept with Sawyer! A part of her was relieved, she'd gotten him out of her system now, she had no reason to _ever_ go near him again. And she didn't have to worry about his feelings because he was used to one night stands. That definitely took the pressure off her.

Another part of her was scared by the woman who had slept with Sawyer, why had she done it? She knew it was wrong and if anyone ever found out they would be disgusted by her, yet it had felt so right being with him. He'd understood exactly what she needed and when she needed it. No one had ever made her feel the way he had tonight, _no one_. Turning on her flashlight she looked at her wrists, they were bruised! Removing her jeans she contorted around to look at her butt, there were chafe marks and the imprint of the buttons from a shirt she'd been lying on in his tent. Taking off the rest of her clothes she put on long t-shirt and pulled on some shorts she never wore around the Island, but were among her belongings. She walked to the water's edge and took a plunge to wash away the smell of sex and sweat on her.

In her mind it was also a cleansing of the memory of the entire episode from her mind and body. 'But what about my soul?' Teeth chattering she ran back to her tent and put on some warmer clothing, not even bothering to towel herself dry first. She lay back on her makeshift bed and tried to think about anything and everything but what had happened in Sawyer's tent. 'Tomorrow I will go into the jungle with Jack, regain some of that much needed control again. It is most definitely what the Doctor ordered.' With that thought planted firmly in her head she finally succumbed to sleep.

James lay awake in his tent thinking of Kate. He could smell her everywhere and he had the bite and scratch marks to prove that it had really happened too. He wondered if she had any idea how much she had hurt him when she had run out of his tent earlier. This was at least ten times more painful than her comparing him to Wayne.

He'd been unable to stop her from running away quite frankly because his mind and body had refused to cooperate and come together as a coordinated unit after they'd had sex. Still slightly out of it he hadn't been able to stop her and he couldn't help but muse that the entire experience must have rocked her world a little less than it had him. 'Great so she's also the best lay I've ever had. Anything else the Fates wanna throw at me?'

Forcing himself to turn his mind away from Kate, James focused on listening to the sound of the waves crashing on the ocean as a way to get himself to fall asleep. When it finally came to claim him he was mentally exhausted from fighting the compelling need to think about what had happened and what he could have done or should have done to stop her from running out of here like the devil and all his minions were chasing her.

**Next Morning**

James went to her tent to see if she was awake yet, he'd woken up after only a couple hours of sleep andwhile dunking himself in the ocean had decided to grab the bull by it's horns and confront her.

When he got to her tent he was a little taken aback when she called out, "Come in Sawyer." Shrugging, he ducked his head to enter the tent.

She looked earth shatteringly beautiful and **cold**, this wasn't the woman he'd seen in his tent, this was someone heartless impersonating her. Kate's eyes gave away nothing and she looked like she could be made of stone.

"Top of the mornin' to ya, Kate." Good he was calling her Kate meaning he mustn't be too impressed with her fast getaway last night. Even better now she didn't have to worry about hurting his feelings.

"I don't wanna talk about it Sawyer. Because there's nothing_ to_ talk about. What happened… happened, and I know you're not the kind of guy to make a big deal about these things so whatever. I just wanna forget it ever happened, don't you?" James liked the way she made it sound like she really cared what he thought.

"You plannin' on going somewhere, Sheera? See you're all packed up as if you got someplace else you've gotta be."

"Jack and I may be going into the jungle later."

"Ah, yes, St. Jack, where was he when you were all hot and bothered last night?" Kate wrinkled her nose in disapproval at his question but other than that her face remained impassive. James didn't fail to notice her shoulders tense and the hardening look in her eyes.

"Don't worry Freckles, your lapse in judgment is safe with me. Wouldn't want news to get out and tarnish your pristine reputation. 'Sides don't think your Doctor boyfriend would like it too much if he heard you'd been slummin' it." Despite herself, she glared at him, relinquishing some of that emotional control she'd been exerting.

James shook his head at her in disgust when she remained silent, "You're a real piece of work aren't ya? Unfuckingbelievable." That said, he walked out of her tent and headed for the hatch. He needed a shower and badly.

Kate swallowed hard, the look in his eyes had hurt and so had the bitterness in his voice. Needing to calm down she took out the toy plane Tom hadput in their time capsule so many years agoand held it tightly against her chest. 'I am not a selfish person, I do care about other people. I loved him and I got him killed. I just have to be real careful about all the choices I make that's all. I made a bad choice last night, but it's in the past now. I am going to do something useful today, make a real contribution, with Jack, that is all that matters.'

With that thought, she resolutely walked to Claire's tent she needed some female company right now. Then she'd go to the hatch and Jack with her emotions well and fully under control.


	11. Chapter 11

Oh my God, I'm psychic! If anyone watched last night's episode **SOS** you all saw the exchange between Kate and James in which there is an allusion to a conversation or interaction of some sort between the two of them before she goes off into the jungle with Jack and proceeds to find Michael. Anyhoo, onwards and upwards! I have to admit that I didn't really want to cross-refer to any actual episodes after **Dave** but whatever, it still falls in with my story. I will not be cross-referring the rest of this story to any future episodes in season 2 because I plan to have finished this before next Wednesday. Please note that the operative word is PLAN so don't kill me if it doesn't work out that way.

**Chapter 11**

Ana-Lucia approached James warily, although they had spoken again briefly after the fireside revelations, she was going to be alone with him now and she really didn't want to make him angry again.

He was standing at the water's edge staring off into nothing, "What do you want, Hotlips?" He asked the question without ire and he didn't take his eyes off whatever he was looking at.

"I wanted to talk to you. See what you thought about the man we've got in the hatch… See what you think is up with the Others."

"And why would a girl like you care 'bout what I think about any of that?"

"Maybe because a 'girl like me' knows who you really are, and knows that you're a lot smarter than people give you credit for."

James laughed to himself softly at this. "Well if you know all that then I guess you're aware that I can see right through that sentence."

"Yeah, I guess."

"I think that none of us have any idea how clever and just how much our presence here means to Them. And I don't think anyone is askin' the right questions. Anythin' else?"

"No, but if it's all the same to you, I'd like to stay here with you for a little longer. Feel like I am going crazy in the hatch."

James didn't respond to that, he just continued to look out at the water. "I made her a promise, Hotlips. A promise I am not keepin' every day I'm stuck on this Island."

"So let's do something about getting off this Island then." Finally, he turned to look at her, acknowledging her proposal.

"What are you planning, Cocinero?" She asked with genuine interest and curiousity, 'Pity Freckles doesn't give a damn what I think.' He thought to himself.

"I have been havin' the same dream for days now. I think someone up there is tryin' to tell me somethin'."

Ana-Lucia nodded in understanding, "And what happens in this dream?"

James gave her his patented smirk, "Now that would be tellin'… suffice it to say maybe that man ya heard so much about ain't as dead as you may have thought he was."

Understanding he wasn't going to tell her anymore, Ana-Lucia smiled at him, "Glad to hear that."

That said, she watched him walk away from her heading towards his tent. Inwardly she sighed in frustration. The man was an enigma! 'He's going to do something, all I have to do is watch him long enough and I will find out what it is.'

James waited until it 2 a.m. before he crept out of his tent, walking into the jungle he took his shoes off when he got to the CommieCaves. It wouldn't do for him to leave tracks, using skills he had learned long ago he proceeded the trek into the heart of darkness, barefoot. After an hour of walking, he stopped and closing his eyes, turned his sight inwards into himself in a bid to concentrate. 'Cat, show me the way. I promised, now give me a chance to keep that promise.' A few minutes later he opened his eyes, gasping sharply, he saw the way he'd run in his vision like a well lit path in the humid darkness. Using the stealth techniques he'd learned from a Cree tracker he melted into the jungle, covering his tracks as he went.

He knew how to cover his tracks and he knew how to move like a shadow in the night. It had made the difference between life and death in the tropical gloom that was the Amazon years after he'd been taught the skill and he knew it would serve him well now.

He slept in the hollow of a tree during the day and continued on his quest in the gathering dusk. Traveling stealthily and soundlessly he arrived at the hidden entrance in the mountain wall, 16 hours after he had set out. Now the sun had set completely and he entered into the valley that looked exactly as it had done in his vision. Covertly, he climbed up into a hidden crevice on the mountain face. Relieved that he had not been discovered, he surveyed the valley with a critical eye. 'Thank you Cat, I won't let you down again, I promise.' Focusing on his breathing, he let himself fall into a deep state of meditation as he rallied himself in preparation for the assault ahead.

Kate felt a wild panic clutch at her heart, they'd found Michael only to lose Sawyer. When her and Jack had returned to the beach with an exhausted and slightly crazy Michael, she hadn't realized anything was amiss until around midday. When Kate had asked about Sawyer's whereabouts nobody had seemed to know where he was. Shrugging off the niggling feeling that something wasn't right Kate hadn't thought much of it until an hour ago. No one knew where he was and when she went into his tent it had a stillness and air of being untouched that scared her.

Instinctively she knew that if anyone would know about his whereabouts it would be Lady Sneeralot. She marched off to the hatch in a determined attempt to keep a lid on her fears. Kate was five minutes away from the hatch when she sighted the former cop.

"Where is he?" She demanded rudely.

"Where is who? Jack? He's-"

"Not Jack, Ana-Lucia, Sawyer. Where is he?"

Ana-Lucia raised her eye-brows and sneered in understanding, "You get tired of acting like Little Miss Perfect, Katherine?"

"What?"

"I mean you've been with Jack for what, a day and a half? Pressure get too much? Is that why you're suddenly interested in his whereabouts? So you can take out some of your passive aggressive frustrations on him?"

"I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Of course you don't. Well I've got news for you, Kate, as long as I am around I will be watching you. And I will do everything in my power to keep you away from him. You're no good for him, you're no good for Jack either, as far as I am concerned you're nothing but a criminal. And you should have been locked up a long time ago with all the other lowlifes."

Kate and Ana-Lucia were eyeing each other aggressively now, both of them sizing each other up. "I'm not a man that's swayed by your good looks, and I have taken on men twice your size." Ana-Lucia said in a not-so-veiled threat.

Kate glared at Ana-Lucia with impotent rage, she so badly wanted to thrash the Latina but it wasn't going to help her find Sawyer. And with each minute she wasted standing here with Ana-Lucia she felt a little more fear growing inside her.

'What if the Others had given them back Michael because they had taken Sawyer? What if he was dead somewhere because he'd mouthed off a little too much?'

Kate was the first to back down, "Ana-Lucia, I know you don't like me but I also know that you treated him pretty badly when you guys found them on the beach. So forgive my confusion as to why you're all of a sudden playing watchdog for him. It doesn't make any sense." She tried to keep the dislike and attitude out her voice as she spoke.

Ana-Lucia paused at this change in tack, "What's your point?"

"My point is, all I want is to find him. In case you haven't noticed this isn't a normal island. I just can't help but think it's a little weird that Jack and I find Michael and when we get back here, no one has seen or heard from Sawyer since pretty much not long after we left."

Ana-Lucia hesitated, she knew James had gone off somewhere but to her un-ending frustration she hadn't seen him leave his tent. Nor had Eko been able to pick up a trail after the abandoned caves. She didn't want to tell Locke or Jack because, well, that went without saying. Sayid had disappeared somewhere and she herself was about to enlist Eko's help in going into the jungle to find him since she was getting nowhere with Henry Gale. Making a decision she said to Kate, "Maybe he just wanted to be left alone, I don't know where he is, I've been in the hatch most of the time." Well some of it was true, so it wasn't hard for her to look sincere.

Accepting this, Kate turned back round to head back to the beach, maybe he was back from wherever he had gone now. She tried to quash the voice inside that told her that it was a false hope.

Kate looked at her watch as she sat in James' tent, she had been sitting here for over 2 hours, it was 9 o'clock and still no sign of him. She realized that she was sitting in pretty much the same place they'd had sex 2 nights ago. Looking back it felt like an eternity had passed. And rather disconcertingly was the smalltiny shiverof remembered feeling that skated down her spine as she remembered their encounter.

In contrast, the chemistry that she'd felt with Jack in the net, was like child's play. As ineffectual as a candle in the wind. 'Oh my God, Kate, you're an idiot.' She chided herself. But if she was going to be honest with herself, it was true. 'Whatever is between Sawyer and I is all-consuming, insane, it will burn me alive and leave nothing behind. What I have with Jack is good, controllable, a slow burn that can still burn brightly.' That was the difference and she knew it, the difference between sanity and madness. She could retain a sense of herself with Jack whereas with James it was like being possessed, obliterating everything else. Kate had always been in control and not having it scared her, almost as much as the thought of ending up in jail, 'Or him dying.' She couldn't help but add.

She looked up sharply as she heard someone approach the tent, 'Sawyer!' Kate couldn't hide her disappointment when she saw it was just Jack. Shining his torch on her troubled and disappointed face, Jack asked, "What are you doing here in the dark, Kate?"

"Waiting for Sawyer. No one has seen or heard from him since before we got back with Michael." Jack couldn't hide his annoyance at her, "He's probably gone to keep a closer look on the guns Kate, I don't think he was very happy about Charlie giving me a gun. My guess is he's gone to the hide them somewhere else, Charlie says they aren't where they were before."

Kate's eyes widened in alarm, "You don't think he's gone after the Others or something do you?" Jack was silent, "Jack!"

"No Kate, I don't think he's gone after the Others. Why would he? Besides even if he had decided to care about someone else other than himself, he would have left a trail."

"You don't know that, Jack. You don't know what he's capable of."

"And you do? If I remember correctly he had you fooled too when he stole the guns."

Kate was incensed, 'How dare he!'

"Be that as it may, I know him better than you do. And this doesn't make any sense… Jack-"

"I know, you have a connection… We'll wait until morning, if he's not back by then we can go look for him."

Kate looked at Jack with barely concealed resentment, "Morning might be too late."

"It will have to do. There is no point in launching a search party at night when we don't know where we're going, for Sawyer!"

Kate seemed to accept this, smiling sadly she said, "You're right of course. We'll wait until morning."

"You coming?" He asked her impatiently. Shaking her head she replied, "I think I'll wait a little longer." Shrugging as if to say, 'suit yourself' Jack left her there.

As soon as Jack left, Kate started to search through James' things, she was looking for the letter he always carried with him. Twenty minutes later, she raced out of the tent, towards Ana-Lucia's tent.

"Where is he, Ana-Lucia?"

"Not this again-"

"His letter is missing, the letter he always carries with him, if it's not here it means he left with a destination in mind. Tell me where he is!" She didn't want to thiink it could also mean he'd been snatched out of his tent without warning. Besides it didn't make sense because some of his things were missing.

"I don't know!"

"Yes you do! If you really do care about him in the slightest you'll tell me where he is! He went out there on his own, anything could happen to him and your dislike of me might sign his death warrant, do you really want that on your head as well?"

"I've already told you, I don't know! Eko tracked him to the caves then he lost the trail completely. It's like he disappeared into thin air." Ana-Lucia realized her slip too late.

Kate gasped in astonishment, "So when I asked you where he was earlier you'd already tried to find him and you didn't think it was worth telling me? Or _Anyone_? What is wrong with you!" At the last words she was practically screaming. Eko appeared as if out of nowhere, trying to diffuse the situation he approached Kate, his hands out, palms splayed.

Kate was shaking with barely contained violence and distress, "Please, calm down, this is not the way. The Others they watch everything, I'm begging you to keep your voice down and not draw attention." The Nigerian man asked her beseechingly.

Shuddering from the effort of containing her spiraling emotions, Kate gulped in breaths of fortifying air before focusing a no- nonsense stare on Eko. "Do you know something you aren't telling me? Do you know where he is?"

Eko shook his head, "I promise you I do not know where your friend is. What I do know is that he is skilled in hiding his tracks and in not being found."

Kate's eyes widened in surprise at this revelation, "What makes you think he hasn't been taken? Why would you think he is hiding his tracks?"

"I had my suspicions but the look on Ana-Lucia's face tells me she already knew this."

Kate whipped around to glare at Ana-Lucia, "Start talking Ana-Lucia or so help me God I'll-"

"I don't know the exact details, but I know he has experience in this type of thing."

"What do you mean?" Kate and Eko both looked at her curiously.

Ana-Lucia looked over her shoulder before she gestured for the two to follow her to the water's edge. "Let's talk here where the sound of the surf will make it impossible for people to eavesdrop." Kate was startled seeing the logic in this move and wondering why she hadn't thought of it herself.

"The details are sketchy but suffice it to say that between living on a reservation and living in the jungles of Latin America, he has some experience in hiding his tracks." Both Kate and Eko were taken aback by this revelation.

Facing Eko, Ana-Lucia apologized, "I didn't tell you about this earlier because I didn't want to prejudice your search. Just in case he was a little rusty."

"So wait a minute what are you saying? That Sawyer's some stealth expert and he's just kept that vital piece of information to himself all this time?" Kate asked disbelievingly. 'Just because they both speak Spanish it doesn't mean he would tell her something about his past. Does it?' Kate couldn't help but feel a little hurt at the thought that he hadn't wanted to confide in her.

"Yeah." Ana-Lucia answered, bluntly.

"There's a lot about him that you don't know, Princess." Kate felt her anger rising again, 'Good, let's hold on to how much we hate her collagen lipped self.' She told herself latching onto the emotion with the tenacity of a drowning woman.

"So what now? Even if he has gone to find the Others, and he's good at hiding his tracks, what happens when he gets where he's going? There's God knows how many of them and one of him, I don't know about you but I don't think that's a good set of odds."

"What are you suggesting? That we go after him? Where exactly would that be? The trail he left doesn't give any indication of what direction he went in and it rained this afternoon so anything remotely useful would have been washed away." Ana-Lucia argued.

"I don't care, all I know is that I have to do something. I've got the gun he gave me last week and I can take care of myself. I'm going to find him, it's better than sitting here waiting for him to come back."

"I'll come with you." Eko said supportively. Kate looked at him gratefully, "You don't have to, I-"

"If he has found the Others and even if you manage to find him without suffering harm, you will need my help to get away from them. I am coming with you."

Kate turned to look at Ana-Lucia, the former cop seemed surprisingly quiet. "I can't stop you… well I think I could, but I am worried too. All I know is that he said he'd been having dreams and that he had to get off this Island because of a promise he made."

"Dreams about what? A promise to who?" Kate fired the questions rapidly, hungry for any information that would help shed some light on James' actions.

"I don't know, I'm guessing it's tied to Catalina-"

"Come we must prepare to leave before anyone notices, I am going to gather some things." Eko interrupted, before striding off, Kate watched him leave then making ready to follow him she faltered, turning to ask Ana-Lucia "Who's Catalina?"

"The woman he loves."

Kate's heart skipped a beat, 'Oh God, no.' She thought to herself. Then, tucking the scrap of information away into her heart she walked as normally as she could, to her tent to wait for Eko.

She didn't have to wait long because just as she finished packing her backpack he was whispering her name, creeping out, she noticed with relief that Ana-Lucia wasn't with him. In silent understanding she followed Eko into the trees the two of them disappearing without exchanging words to go and find James.


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12**

James snapped out of the trancelike state he had been in suddenly, his eyes opening wide and his nostrils flaring. His heartbeat was calm and so was his body but when he tried to straighten his legs the muscles and joints groaned in protest. He had cut off the circulation in his butt so he slowly stood up in his hiding place and tried to walk off the pins and needles as best he could.

Looking at the watch he had put on the floor next to him he realized that it was now midnight, he'd meditated for over 2 hours! 'Shit, what if I missed my window of opportunity? I gotta work fast, don't have all the time in the world before Jack, Kate or someone else ruins everything, by making a big deal about the fact that I am gone. God help me if Zeke and the Others discover I am here or on my way here.'

Wiping his hand down his face in order to wake himself up a little bit, he stared out into the camp, fighting the exhaustion he felt due to the meditation. 'This is why I don't like to do it. Tires me out too much now that I am more than a little rusty.' His plan had been simple, follow the dream to the camp then hopefully something would land in his lap and he could get back to the beach. However, as he made his way here James had revised this plan, he wanted to know how they had ended up on this Island, for what purpose, and who exactly was running this operation. He didn't like being a puppet, he never had.

James looked through his pack, he had tarp and poles to pitch a rudimentary but effective tent, rope, water, the pain reducing herbs from Sun, a rifle, ammunition, a white shirt, binoculars, boar jerky and a chocolate bar. To avoid making noise or leaving any clues he'd unwrapped it at the CommieCaves and shoved it in the pack like that. Picking it up he decided to indulge himself in the treat, he wasn't a fan of chocolate generally but since the crash he was starting to think he hadn't given it a fair chance to rock his world.

Biting into the chewy goodness, James couldn't help but think of the last time he had been in a position to appreciate chocolate. He'd been in the heart of the Amazon and they had just made camp on the edge of the mighty river. Diego, Travis, Catalina and him had been walking non-stop for 3 days looking for a village they were told was suffering from disease. Nobody wanted to help the villagers as rumor had it whatever was killing off the locals was highly contagious and deadly. Setting up camp in order to rest and do some reconnaissance in order to find out where the hell they were, Catalina had handed out chocolate bars to everyone. When James had refused she'd smiled at him sweetly and told him that after three days without proper rest, food or shower, it would taste like a little piece of heaven. Giving up on getting through to her that he just did not like chocolate he had accepted the candy bar and to his amazement in the middle of the world's most hostile jungle he'd had what he'd jokingly referred to as 'an almost holy' experience eating it.

Shaking his head in amusement at the memory, James looked out into the camp again and noticed that there was some sort of movement down there. Picking up the binoculars James watched with growing interest as the man he called Zeke stood directly within his sights talking to a tall broad shouldered giant of a man. It looked like Zeke had just returned from somewhere outside the camp because he was taking off his jacket, handing over his weapons to another person James couldn't make out. Then to his surprise, Zeke pulled off a wig and the eyebrows and beard he had been wearing too. 'Well, I'll be damned. What the hell is going on here?' James continued to watch the pair for 20 more minutes before the giant started to walk through the camp towards the hidden entrance as Zeke descended down into the hatch James had seen in his vision.

James lay down flat on his stomach and followed the figure with his eyes until it was about a foot away from the entrance.

"When he gets back from the hatch I want you to watch him carefully. I think he's hiding something. I want everyone to be on alert, no mistakes can happen now. Having Michael back should keep them occupied for a while. But I still want to be on the safe side, we should know within a few days whether Gale will be able to make contact with the mole."

"Yes sir, right away sir. I will get Alex to watch him. And I will stay posted here, sir!" Replied the man who couldn't be older than Kate as he stood to attention as the giant addressed him.

"Good, I know I can trust you to make sure no one gets in or out without my permission first, Toby. God alone knows what I would do if I didn't have you watching my back."

"Not to worry Sir, I wouldn't let anything happen to you. I would hate to think what would happen if you weren't here to keep things under control."

"Well with your vigilance, I am confident we will never have to find out, Toby. I am going to go back and talk to Alex myself. You keep your eyes on that entrance, if you see anyone you don't know or recognize within 10 seconds, shoot them. Dead."

"Yes sir!"

The man called Toby remained standing where he was as he watched the leader walk back towards the camp. Then he walked around the perimeter of the mountain base in fulfillment of his promise to be vigilant.

James slid back soundlessly before he sat up again, 'Well well seems like my man Zeke's second in command!' Thinking over what he'd just seen and heard, the best James could come up with was that the key to getting off the Island was the giant or maybe whatever was in this particular hatch. 'In order to kill the snake, you have to cut off its head. The body may thrash in response but eventually it will be still.'

Now the problem was how he was going to find out the information necessary to eliminate the threat these people posed. Against his will he knew he couldn't make a move just yet. The timing was off, he would have to be patient and wait until tomorrow night, when the moon would be full if he had a hope in hell of succeeding. Meanwhile he could plan how exactly he was going to kill Toby, Zeke and their 6 foot 8 leader.

**Meanwhile**

'Two in the morning! I've been traipsing through this jungle for almost 4 hours! I don't know where we are going, or how long it will take us to get there. Or what we will find when we get there, or if we'll get captured or killed before we ever find Sawyer.' Kate was starting to feel the unbearable pressure trying to be quiet, not talking and doing their best to cover their tracks as well as be on alert for sounds of pursuit was putting on her. The only consolation was that Eko must be feeling it too. Especially since neither one of them really knew where they were going. It had been a silent agreement to head deeper into the Jungle and in one of the two directions neither one of them had ever gone in. Come the dawn they both knew they would have to make a decision about which direction to go again as they would be in a better position to do so in the natural light, for now they would doggedly continue their silent march in the vast nothingness.

'Oh God, please let it rain and wash away our tracks. And don't let anyone notice our disappearance until mid-morning at the earliest. Oh and keep him safe wherever he is, that goes without saying.' She couldn't help but worry about how he was faring, wondering if he was alive or dead, it was driving her crazy.

She thought back to the night in the tent and cringed inwardly, she couldn't have handled that any worse if she'd run out his tent screaming rape at the top of her lungs. In hindsight she realized that she must have hurt his feelings, again. 'I can't seem to stop doing that! And when I am not doing the hurting, he's hurting me.' Maybe it was time to make some admissions to herself, now that there was a risk that he was lost to her forever. 'Yeah but if I do that, I'll inadvertedly give myself away as I always seem to do with him. So it's better not to think about it at all." Focusing on the task at hand Kate distracted herself with trying to listen for sounds of being followed.

**Later on**

The pink fingers of dawn spread their romantic light on the island, Kate and Eko finally stopped walking to discuss their next step. Whispering, Eko opined, "I think we should head northeast, because the lay of the land suggests there is some sort of depression near the horizon over there. It may just be that mountaintop ends in nothing but a bit of land then water or it could be that there is much more land behind that. If that is the case then, we are going in the right direction. If not we can backtrack and go in the other direction."

Kate nodded at his assessment, "What happens if we are wrong? How long will it take to get to that mountaintop?"

"All day at least. If we are lucky we can get there just after sunset. We need to move now, I want us to rest when the sun reaches its zenith. It will be too hot and we will be far too conspicuous. Can you make it until then without resting?"

Kate nodded once again, she didn't comment further but she noticed he hadn't answered her first question. Finishing off her bottle of water, she wiped her brow with the back of her hand before gesturing for Eko to lead the way. Wordlessly he marched on, and mentally girdling herself she followed suit.

They slept in turns, up in a tree. Kate for the first two hours, then Eko for the other two. At four the continued their trek, Kate would never admit it but she was exhausted, it wasn't like she had been well rested when they had set off and now she felt like a zombie walking barefoot on the muddy, rotting and pungent jungle floor. Her boots were tied and hanging around her neck. Like James had done she'd taken them off before they left the caves, and her feet had blisters on them that she knew would hurt for days.

She studied the Nigerian man with interest, nothing seemed to bother him, he was taking this entire expedition in his stride and Kate couldn't help but thank God he was there with her, she drew strength from his presence. 'As long as he doesn't panic, neither will I.' She told herself determinedly. It was now around 7 p.m. the sun was setting rapidly and they were still a few hours from the mountain. When they got to it, her and Eko had agreed to try and find a way around it under the cover of night, if that failed then they would have to climb it the following morning because it would be too dangerous otherwise.

'First thing I'll do when I see him, is hit him, hard. For putting me through this. Then I'll kiss him, chastely! And tell him I am sorry about how I acted in his tent, ask him, no beg him to forgive me. He'll love that, the loser! Then I'll hug him and he'll hug me back, telling me its ok… Get a grip Kate! Oh God please let him be alive, well and full of lip as usual! I can't make it on this Island without him, I need him, and he needs me too. I know it's crazy and it defies explanation, but it's true, somehow we keep each other sane. Besides I need to find out just what he was doing on a reservation _and_ in the jungles of Latin America!' Kate was close to tears, she wanted to cry in desperation, exhaustion and from guilt at how things between them had been when she'd last spoken to him. He was the closest thing she had to a best friend on the Island and she didn't know if she could handle anything happening to him. Silently and furiously the tears unbidden began to fall, coursing down her face as she kept on walking behind Eko. She wiped them away angrily and tried to get a hold of herself. Stopping abruptly, Eko turned around to look at her, before he went up to her and wiped the tears from her face with his shirt. He had been naked from the waist up since they had left the caves, but had kept his shirt on his shoulders, like she had her shoes.

Looking up at Eko gratefully, Kate smiled self-consciously then whispered, "Thank you, I'm okay now. Let's keep going." Eko gave her a look filled with compassion before he took the lead again and they continued on.


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter 13**

As soon as the light of the full moon was obscured by a drifting cloud, James took aim and shot Toby in the head.

He scaled down the mountain wall digging his hands and barefeet into the hidden crevices he'd seen and made note of earlier that day. Hunching down as he ran, he ran alongside the edges of the valley heading towards the camp. He had slung the rifle over his shoulder and behind his back. Pandemonium hit the camp as everyone started to scream and run while the security personnel in the camp started to take offensive positions in order to fight back. James knew he didn't have long, but what helped him blend in was the white shirt he'd packed for no real reason.

All the people in charge of security in the camp wore white shirts so James knew it must have been some sort of divine providence that he had packed that particular shirt.

Also while he waited for night to fall, James had painfully hacked away his dirt blonde locks in another bid to blend in with the crowd. He had observed that all the men in the camp had short hair so he'd decided to while away the time by altering his appearance accordingly. _(See pictures of Josh Holloway with short hair on his website to get an idea of what he looks like.)_

Out of breath he reached the cover of the trees, lying down with his stomach flat on the ground, he shot Zeke and his female bodyguard Alex in the leg with two rapid shots. Firing the gun in the air and in random directions he knew it would distract people and confuse them. Shrugginghis pack of his back, he lit his other shirt on fire then threw the flaming article as far away from him as he could on the orchard floor and half crawled half slithered with only the rifle on his back, towards the hatch.

'Come on, come on, come on!' He chanted in his head as he reached the trap door and tugged with all his might. At this point he'd been spotted and shots were being fired in his direction. Praying like he had never prayed before, James managed to prise the door open, falling headfirst into the waiting hands of the giant and some of his men.

"Sonofabitch."

--------- --------

Kate and Eko ducked down instantaneously when they heard the sound of gunshots fired. In a crouch the two headed cautiously towards the sound, "Do you think they've seen us?" She hissed urgently at Eko.

"No, this is happening somewhere else, we are close."

Stopping when they reached the foot of the mountain, Eko stood up and started searching the mountain face.

"What are you doing?" Kate hissed at him in confusion.

"I'm looking for an entrance."

"I don't think there any entrances! We have to find some other way to get there!"

"No, there must be some other way in here, a faster way to get to them! Look for signs of a secret entrance. Any bush or shrub or lump that looks out of place."

Reluctantly, Kate did as she was told, running her hands eyes frantically along the mountainside.

As more shots and yells were heard, Kate had to force herself to stop panicking and concentrate on finding the entrance.

She wrung her hands in mounting frustration and looked further along the mountain side her eyes colliding with a figure in white. Gasping in shock, she stared at the woman, moving as if in a trance towards her.

"Kate!" Eko whispered her name loudly, wondering what the brunette was doing walking off in the middle of their search like that.

Kate ignored him, then stopped in confusion as the woman was gone, she turned to Eko, who was striding towards her purposely.

"What are you doing?" He demanded sharply. Kate turned to look where the woman had been standing, she frowned. In front of her she noticed a discrepancy in the mountain wall.

Eko noticed this too along with the mystifying faint smell of roses. Together they pressed into the depression, the fake wall slid in and they stepped into the gap. The door shut behind them and they immediately pressed themselves into the shadow of the wall. Pointed at them were over half a dozen guns and the faces of the men and women wielding the weapons showed they would receive no mercy.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

James was standing in front of the giant, disarmed and bloody, after capturing him the giant himself had pummeled the Southerner in a fit of blind rage. James was pretty sure his rib had been broken again and there was the little matter of his injured shoulder throbbing with pain as he was sure some healing tissue had been torn.

Facing the giant, he couldn't help but feel a twinge of recognition, 'I know this man from somewhere.' The memory was eluding him.

"So you're the infamous Sawyer."

"I wouldn't say I was infamous."

"And your name isn't Sawyer, either."

"What do you know about it?" James growled threateningly.

"I know a lot of things. What I don't know is how you managed to find this place. You eluded every single one of my people and no one even realized you were missing until we got report that the fugitive and her male friend were gone."

James kept a poker face on but inside he was in turmoil, 'Kate and Jack were looking for her were they?'

"You got a name, André?"

The giant frowned at the nickname, "Yeah I got a hundred."

"Figures."

"How long have you been here then?"

"How long have _you_ been here?" James prepared himself for the blow that was sure to follow but it never came. Instead André was looking at him with curious interest.

"What will it take to make you less belligerent, hm? Okay you want to know how long I've been here? Almost 4 years, this camp has been here since before Dharma. Now I'm going to ask you one last time, how long have you been here?"

"This is my second night here."

"How did you find this place."

"Accident."

"You're lying."

"Think whatcha like but that's the truth."

"I'm not seeing this conversation lasting very long James. Yes I know your name, wanna know how?"

"You got someone workin' for ya on the inside and somehow ya'll got yourselves a copy of the flight manifest."

"Very good. Looks like me and whole bunch of people in your neck of the woods underestimated you. Pity you didn't have any friends to share your theories with, otherwise we'd be a lot more concerned about your bunch-"

"What are you doin' to those kids André?" James interrupted impatiently.

"I don't know what you mean."

"Now who's lyin'?"

James was swaying slightly in the hands of the two henchmen, and he seemed to be struggling to keep his words from slurring slightly.

"You wanna take a seat, looks like you could use a chair." Gesturing to the men, André walked to a chair in the room that looked like a replica of the Swan station, except it was twice the size and had a larger computer and a few more chairs.

"Now let's talk about this like civilized people. I want to know how you got here and who you've told."

"No way, André. How 'bout this, you tell me how the hell we wound up on this damn Island and what y'all want with us Oceanic survivors, and maybe I'll let you live."

André had retraced his steps and wasstanding in front of the entrance, smiled sinisterly, "I have to give you credit where it's due James but you're living in a dream world if you think you are going to leave here. Alive."

James nodded in acquiescence and didn't say another word. As he nodded his head he whipped his head sharply to the left and upwards, butting one of the men in the nose. The crunch of bones breaking and the fountain of blood spurting all over James and the man to his right was horrifying to behold.

Before André could get across the room or fire his gun James had delivered the heels of his bound hands upwards in one swift motion into the other man's nose, killing the man instantly. Swiveling in his chair he kicked the other bleeding man straight into André.

Grabbing the pistol in the dead man's belt he fired one shot into Andre's right shoulder, crippling his gun hand and causing the giant to drop the gun. He pointed the gun at André again and shook his head, sending drops of blood spraying everywhere.

André froze on the floor where he was kneeling, keeping his hands open and slightly raised in concession of defeat. James fumbled around in the dead man's pockets, searching for his hunting knife. Finding it he sat back in the chair, slick with blood as it was and placed the knife between his knees and still holding the gun trained on André he started to saw the rope off.

"Who are you?" André asked in a slightly awe-struck fearful voice.

"A man who don't take too kindly to bein' threatened or told what to do."

"Where did you learn to fight like that? And shoot like that? The way you shot Toby and Alex and Frank none of those were flukes were they?"

Finally freeing himself of his bounds, James trained the gun on André with one hand this time. "No they weren't, and seein' as this room is soundproof ya better start talkin' before I lose ma patience."

"Some of you were chosen and others just happened to get on the wrong plane. They've tried to crash a number of planes over the last 20 something years. Yours was the first one to have so many survivors."

"Keep talkin'."

"It's part of a government sanctioned project, anyone with a brilliant idea has thrown in their two cents. The next phase involves testing some of the new theories on children which is why we have taken the kids."

"What exactly is this project?"

"Study on humans, see how they will survive under difficult circumstances is thesimplest explanation. The government role is behind the scenes so if anything ever goes wrong they won't be implicated."

"Which government? The US?"

"I get the impression that this is a little more international than just the US government."

"How do I make contact with the outside world?"

"You don't."

James eyed André closely, flipping the hunting knife expertly with his left hand, his eyes never leaving André's he said, "You got one more chance to answer that question without… encouragement, Beanstalk."

André swallowed nervously, "It's the green button, you can access different airwaves on it. You have to tweak the tuner to get the right wavelength then you can transmit your signal."

James smiled at this, "Well come on up here an' do it yourself. Don't have a lot of time, I got somewhere else I gotta be."

André got up unsteadily then stumbled over to the computer, "Easy now, don't wanna make me nervous. I might let ma knife slip straight into your kidney." James warned.

Sliding his chair over to the injured man nursing a broken nose he asked, "What's your name?"

"His name is Toby." André spoke up for the man.

"Toby and Toby? Man y'all don't mind losin' any sense of self in this place do ya?" Placing his foot on Toby's head James said, "One wrong move Number 2 and I'll bust your head open, understood?" The injured man nodded slightly from underneath James' foot.

"Move over to the left so I can see whatcha got there, Beanstalk."

André did so obligingly, then he asked, "What wavelength do you want?"

"Move that dial over to the right twice over and then once to the middle. Yeah that's right. Thanks André, I'll take it from here." That said James kicked the chair towards a far wall then walked over to the controls.

"Move over there, against the wall, feet together, hands in the air. Lower those arms even a fraction of an inch, an' we'll have words."

Then he turned to the computer controls and double-checking that everything was in order, James tapped out a distress signal using a code. A few minutes later, he received an answering code that made sense only to him and the recipient.

"Where are we, André?"

"In the South Pacific, no more than a couple hours away from Fiji by plane."

James tapped some more code into the computer before changing the frequency again and switching the big red button that said OFF.

"Time to go face the music, Boss." Dragging Toby up, James gestured for André to precede him. Climbing up the hatch ladder was Toby then André with James' gun right behind his back, then James.

James stopped André, handing him a pistol that he knew had no more bullets left in it. Instinct told him the giant was unaware of this, "I want ya to train this lil guy on me when we climb outta here. One wrong move an' you're dead."

André took the gun from James with a ill-disguised look of smug satisfaction.


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter 14**

Kate stared in shock at the bloodied man hauling himself up from the hatch, especially when he was followed by a nasty looking mammoth of a man who had a gun trained on someone. When she saw James emerge from the hatch, she thought she was going to pass out with relief. 'Oh thank you Lord! Now about getting us out of this tricky situation, feel free to do so at anytime.'

James stumbled into the man, and the man stuck his pistol in his lower back, prodding the Southerner to walk towards the trees in the orchard. There was an orange tree, and sitting underneath it were Zeke and Alex, who looked relieved to see the Southerner had been apprehended. As soon as they reached the pair, James let the pistol drop out of his sleeve as he whipped behind André and held the gun to his head.

"Seems to me we got ourselves a bit of a situation!" Yelled James for the benefit of all the guns trained on him. Kate and Eko were both bound and gagged, on their knees about five feet away facing him. Half the guns trained on them were behind and the other half were to Sawyer's right, meaning he was protected from behind by the tree trunk and also from the left side.

'Come on James if you don't do somethin' fast you're all dead. Hope this works'

"How 'bout I count to three, if you don't let _her_ go, I blow Beanstalk's brains all over Zeke and his bodyguard here." He had cocked his head in Kate's direction when he mentioned her.

He counted to 2 winking at Eko, before anyone could say anything he shot André in the head. He'd made the mistake of missing the heart with the Marshal he wasn't going to risk it this time.

Kate was shocked, and winded because as soon as Sawyer had fired his gun, Eko had slammed her into the ground protecting her from the bullets that were thundering all around her. 'Nooooooooooo!' Her mind was screaming over and over again, 'He's dead, no way is he going to survive this, oh God oh God why?'

When the guns were silent, Kate tears of sorrow streaming down her face, felt herself being pulled up by Eko.

James was alive, he had Zeke as a human shield and was motioning for Alex to get up. "Go get Walt, I am giving ya five minutes if we're not back by then, I kill him too. You walk in front, I want your back to mine, if you make any wrong moves I kill him then you."

In agreement, Alex limped painfully to press her back against James and do as she had been told. All the guns that had been trained on Kate and Eko were silent as they were being re-loaded, using the slight advantage, Eko had risen to his knees and borne down on the men positioned behind them like a sinister firing squad.

Running to James Kate got her bounds undone by him her eyes glowing with relief that they were all still alive, 'For now at least.' James thought to himself, darkly.

"I don't even wanna know how y'all found me Freckles, now for all our sakes we gotta find Walt and get the hell outta here."

Concurring with him she worked the gag off her mouth, "I need a gun so I can help him before someone-" She was interrupted by Eko who had somehow managed to work his bounds off in the tussle with the men and appropriate a loaded rifle. She glanced up at James in awe and he shook his head in disbelieving agreement.

"Here, you still need a gun." Handing her a rifle that had been lying on the ground next to Zeke when he had been seated, he gave her a piercing look trying to discern if she was hurt in any way. "I'm fine." She said it softly, touched at his concern.

"Make sure ya stay that way, me an' Alex will be back in two shakes, isn't that right Alex?" With that he prodded the injured girl as she led them to the mud huts in the camp at the edge of the valley.

Kate remained where she was for a second as she took a fortifying deep breath, James' sarcasm had a calming effect on her. 'As long as he's quipping, things are going to be okay.' She told herself resolutely.

Eko was moving towards her now with a hostage in tow, so using her rifle she made sure she was covering his back.

"What are we gonna do?"

"We need to get them to put their guns down."

"How are we going to do that?"

"Shoot the remaining five men over there, then bargain with this one."

"Are we shooting to kill?" Kate couldn't keep the reluctance out of her voice as she asked the question.

"No. Aim for their shoulders, the arm with the weapon, if that fails then aim for the legs."

"Okay, I can do that."

"Now!"

Together the two aimed and fired, taking down two men at a time, they didn't have to fire a second shot on anyone. Turning in unison they faced the remaining six gunmen who threw their weapons to the ground in surrender instantaneously.

Ordering Kate to stay in the protection of the trees Eko, ran with his hostage to pick up the discarded weapons. He then commanded the men to huddle together as he bound and gagged every single one of them. He had thrown the pile of weapons in front of Kate, and now that the men including the ones Kate and him had shot were bound he yelled out to the onlookers.

"Listen to me! I do not want to hurt you people, if anyone tries anything I will. If you all just put down whatever weapons you have I will take this as an act of good faith. I won't shoot unless you give me reason to. Come here I want all of you to line up in front of me, women and children first."

Stunned the crowd did what it was told, there weren't many children, just the two kids that had been abducted from the beach when the tail section had crashed into the water, and nine other boys and girls of an indeterminate age.

Kate kept her rifle trained on the crowd as Eko and the hostage bound all the adult men and women. They let the children sit on the floor, and Kate started to count the people. Before she finished, James wason his way back to themwith Alex and Walt, he still had his gun trained on Zeke.

Leaving a gagged and bound Zeke on the floor, James met up with Kate and Eko in the shadow of the trees to discuss their next move.

"Jesus how many of them are there? I saw some oldfolks in the hut they were keepin' Walt in. Had some kind of brain machines hooked to him."

"I am not sure, so far I have counted 100 people excluding the children. Sawyer we can't leave them here."

"If we take the kids with us it will slow us down, and will give them reason to come after us."

Kate looked at James with dread, "Are you serious?"

"Yeah Kate I am! If we take these kids with us I don't see us makin' it back to the beach, and it will start a war I am not sure we can win!" He whispered vehemently.

"Maybe you shouldhave thought of that before you decided to go all Commando on your own, Sawyer!" She hissed back at him furiously.

"We can split up." They both turned around to look at Eko like he had grown two heads.

"What now?" James asked, incredulously.

"I can take the children and you and Kate can take Walt and the new leader."

Kate frowned as she processed this, "No, it's too risky. We have to go back _together_. We started this together we will finish it together. If we split up now and something happens to you, Sawyer we'll be defenseless against an attack. You have all the guns remember?"

"Actually I don't Freckles, I gave them to someone for safekeeping while I was gone and in case I did not make it back."

Kate and Eko looked at him in surprise, "Ana-Lucia. That's why she stayed behind." Kate assumed.

"Wrong, Sass, I gave them to Chewie, figure'd he knows how to use 'em and as long as Tokyo Rose doesn't get attacked he'll keep a cool head."

"You gave them to Jin?" Kate asked baffled.

"Yeah, I also figured no one'd ask him about them so hell got to kill two birds with one stone."

"We need to make a decision about the children." Interjected Eko.

"Okay, Shaft, how 'bout you and Freckles take the kids. I'll take Walt, an' my buddy Zeke over there."

"No-" Kate started to argue.

"Do you realize how much of the risk you are placing upon your shoulders?"

"Yeah Amistad, I do. I know what I'm doin' let's just get goin' it will be light in a few hours."

Eko nodded before turning around to herd the children together, lifting Emma the little girl Ana-Lucia had saved from the tail section onto his shoulders, he took her brother's hand and said, "Come on children, you're going with me."

Kate stood there underneath the tree as if rooted to the spot and looked atJames searchingly, "Why are you doing this? Just because he's injured you can't trust him, you have no idea how many of them are out there waiting to ambush us or-"

"Neither do you, Kate. I came here knowin' exactly what I was doin' and you followed me here, endangerin' yourself and Eko. I can't do my job properly if I have to worry about the safety of others. Now go, looks like Mr. Ed's 'bout to leave you behind." As he spoke he spied his discarded pack and put it on his shoulders.

He gently pushed Kate in the direction of the retreating Eko and then turned to walk over to Zeke. "Come on, Hillbilly Pirate, we're goin' on a trip." He kicked the bleeding man, roughly. Stooping, he hauled the man to his feet and turned to Walt who had remained silent since he'd been detached from the wires and tubes in the hut.

"Come on Shortround, let's get ya back to your Daddy." His voice was cheerful and upbeat as if they were going on a fun adventure. Walt turned to look at the sea of faces on the floor, they were all bound gagged and some were wounded. He stared at them in a detached manner before following James towards the mountain and its entrance.

Kate, Eko and the kids were waiting for James to come through the entrance and when he did, she breathed a sigh of relief. 'One potential crisis down, five million more to go before we are safe.'

James frowned in anger, "What y'all waitin' for? Go!"

With that, Eko started to move, he led Kate and the kids back the way the two of them had come earlier on that evening. James lagged behind, covering his and their tracks as they went. Stopping only once to teach Walt and then continuing on.

By sunrise, Kate, Eko and the kids were much further away and James led his hostage and Walt in a different direction.


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter 15**

Kate whipped around looking for James, she hadn't realized they were no longer behind her because she had been too focused on making sure the children were okay, and holding up under the grueling pace.

"Sawyer!" She breathed in consternation.

"He's gone another way. About an hour ago." Eko told her without stopping or turning around.

"How do you know?"

"I know. It makes sense and will help confuse any would-be pursuers. He knows what he's doing Kate. Have faith as hard as it must be for you to believe, he really does."

Kate was upset, 'Why does it seem that other people on this damn rock know him better than I do? When did this happen?' It was also slightly disconcerting to hear people speaking of him like he was an equal or even an authority on something good.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

James was fighting hard to stay focused on keeping an eye on Walt, covering their tracks and keeping an eye on Zeke. He'd realized too late that he hadn't bound Alex and by now she must have freed the Others. 'Rookie mistake James! How couldya let yourself be so distracted by Freckles and those damn doe eyes she was makin' at you!'

It didn't matter now all that mattered was damage control. Zeke must have realized the same thing too, and that would explain his meek behaviour. It irked James to no end that he couldn't stop and question the man but time was running out. He had to get them back onto the survivors' side of the Island as fast as possible. He had thought about tying Zeke up and hiding Walt somewhere and going back but he knew that was a foolish plan. He would have to plow ahead and hope that his luck didn't run out on him.

"You tired, Shortround?" James asked in a concerned voice.

"No, Mr… I mean, Sawyer. I am fine, we have to get back to the beach, I can rest when we get there."

"Thank God you're talkin' again, you had me worried there little man, I thought they'd done somethin' to you."

"I held on until you got here. I knew you were coming for me."

"What's that now?"

"I knew you were coming for me Sawyer, she told me I had to wait and you would come to rescue us."

"Who told you what now?"

"Catalina, she told me you were coming."

James froze in shock, grabbing the boy's shoulders, he kneeled on the ground, shaking him forcefully. "You saw her?"

"Yeah, she stayed with me most of the time, and she didn't say much, but she had a beautiful voice when she sang to me at night."

James looked at the child with dismay, 'I'm losin' ma damn mind, that's what's happenin' here.'

Releasing the child, he looked up at Zeke who was watching the exchange with keen interest. His eyes showed he'd heard everything and was trying to figure out what it all meant.

James stood threateningly, "Move it Zeke, I don't recall tellin' you to stop walkin'."

The man shrugged nonchalantly before he started walking again, in silence James brought up the rear looking behind him to see if anyone was following.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

They stopped to rest at the same spot they had rested on their way to the Others' camp the day before. The children slept in the tree, Kate at the trunk, while Eko stood on guard. After some argument, Kate had conceded to this arrangement because quite frankly she was far too exhausted.

Eko watched her as she slept and wondered at her relationship with the Southerner. 'Those two love and hate each other so much I wonder when they will ever pick an emotion and stick with it.' He mused to himself.

Eko knew if they even had a chance to make it as a couple, it was a long and rocky road ahead of them. Kate was fighting her feelings for the Southerner that was glaringly obvious to Eko, the one he couldn't figure out was James. The man was a mystery, he obviously had some military training but there was so much more to the man it wasn't surprising that no one else seemed to have picked up on it. And now Ana-Lucia complicated the picture, because she had some power over Kate with knowledge of James' past, but also it was starting to look like she cared about the man as more than just a friend. Something that made emotions Eko did not want to study too closely rise to the surface.

Looking at Kate's wristwatch he had to fight the urge to groan in frustration, two more hours to let them rest! 'I need to sleep too! But I won't because our lives depend on it. Sometimes I really wish I had died.'

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

An owl hooted somewhere in the distance, making the hairs on James' neck stand of their own accord. Owls were a bad omen and he did not like to think what the connotations of that were going to be for him. At midday he had let Zeke and Walt rest for a few hours, the man's leg had bled through his makeshift bandage so James had rinsed it in water and slapped some of Sun's herbal remedy on it before retying it. His pack had scorch marks on it but thankfully everything else including his boots,was still in there.

When they had resumed their trek, Zeke had mumbled through his gag, so James had lowered it briefly. "Why did you re-dress my wound?"

Replacing the gag, James had responded truthfully, "Blood leaves a trail, 'sides I have no intentions of carryin' you Zeke."

Now it was around nine o'clock, and James and Walt were supporting the injured man as they climbed a steep hill. When they got to the top James looked behind them and saw the torches glowing in the dark behind them. 'Shit! They must be 2 hours behind! They'll make it over the hill a lot faster than we did. Damn it!' Hustling Zeke down the hill before he could notice how close his people were, James set an even more grueling pace than before. They were still a good three hours from the CommieCaves and even there the chances of him defending them from attack and succeeding were slim. 'Come on Cat, help me out here!' He thought to himself desperately.

This time he did not bother to hide their tracks as they were running out of time, and half running, he dragged both Zeke and Walt into the heart of the jungle with him. To James' everlasting gratitude they stumbled into a small stream that was flowing in the direction he wanted them to go. 'To hell with it, wherever this stream goes so do we. I can't risk being on dry land right now. At least in here we have a chance.'

Turning to Walt he said, 'I hope you can swim son, 'cause we're gonna be in here for a while and it may get real deep and the current real strong in some places.'

Walt looked up at James with the trusting innocence only children can have in an adult, "Yeah I can swim. I'm not a strong swimmer but I know you won't let anything bad happen to me." The child spoke with such unwavering conviction that James was blown away.

"Yeah well, don't be too sure kid, try real hard to make it on your own. _If all_ else fails I'll be here."

With that he dragged Zeke with one arm and Walt with the other downstream, cursing under his breath at the frigid coldness of the water.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Kate felt her breath catching in her throat, they were running so fast her vision was blurry. Eko had told them all to run after he'd heard an owl hooting somewhere behind them a half hour ago. The children were amazingly resilient; they hadn't complained once and had been able to help scrounge for food like seasoned veterans. Now they were running alongside Kate but they didn't seem to be having as much trouble keeping up with Eko as she was.

'I can't run like this for much longer! I just can't!' Suddenly Eko stopped, holding his hand up. The children shuddered to halt like well trained horses but Kate ended up barreling into Eko's solid form and would have fallen if he hadn't caught her. Sinking to her knees she vomited violently, unable to stop the humiliating display of herself she was making.

When she was done Eko gave her some water to rinse her mouth with, then a few sips before taking the water away.

"Gently now. Take small sips only."

Kate wanted to cry she could feel all the children were watching her and she just wanted to crawl into a hole and die.

After a few minutes, Eko helped her up to her feet, "The caves are only a few minutes away, come let us rest there." Weakly she followed him and the children to the caves, silently giving thanks they wouldn't have to run again just yet.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

James felt like he was dying, his lungs were bursting and everything was in a red haze as he swam desperately for the surface. Gasping for air as his broke the surface he choked on some water before he managed to start swimming towards the rocks. Looking around him he realized he was at the waterfall! The stream had led them into the waterfall, and he'd been fine when they had landed in the water at the bottom, except he'd had to let go of Zeke in order to make sure Walt survived the fall. After placing Walt on a rock he'd gone back in the water with his flashlight to find Zeke. The injured man was unconscious and more than half drowned because he'd hit his head on the rocks on the descent. While swimming to the bottom of the pool in order to drag the man up he'd been hit by a fallingrock in the back of his head and that had made him a little disorientated. Combining the injury with the pressure as he swam and the strain of dragging the unconscious man, James himself had almost drowned.

Walt was looking at him withsaucer-like eyes as he dragged Zeke onto the rock with him. Kneeling at the man's chest, James ripped the gag off and started to give him CPR, a few minutes later Zeke choked up water and James turned him over onto his side so he could spit the water out.

"Is that what it took ta get ya to ungag me, James?" The man spoke without rancor, but it still managed to sound like criticism.

"Unfortunately, it seems that's the only way to get ya to shut up Zeke." Having said that, James gagged the man again, then falling backwards to catch his breath, he leaned on a boulder, his legs sprawled in front of him.

"You okay, lil man?"

Walt nodded, "That was kinda cool."

James laughed slightly, "Yeah, I guess it was."

Dragging himself to his feet he looked at his pack in surprise, "It was in the water I fished it out for you." Walt said.

"Thanks, now come on let's get goin'."

Yanking Zeke roughly to his feet James pulled some rope out of his pack and tied it to the man's bound wrists. Checking his rifle and then the pistol he'd tied to his ankle, James stood up and led the way, once again hiding their tracks as they went.

They arrived on the beach around 1 a.m., Sayid was keeping watch and he dropped his gun in surprise as he saw Walt running down towards the beach. "Michael! Michael!" The Iraqi yelled excitedly, as Vincent barking excitedly came running to greet his master.

People started to come out of their tents wondering what the commotion was, "Jack! Walt's back!" Yelled Charlie as he shook the sleeping surgeon awake, Jack got up groggily, running out of his tent with the elated Charlie behind them.

"Dad!" Exclaimed Walt, as his father ran up to hug him. Everyone was exclaiming and talking excitedly. Only Jack and Sayid noticed the man that James had tied to a rope behind him.

"Who's this?" Enquired Sayid.

"This is the Hillbilly Pirate that shot me on the raft, took Walt, an' kidnapped Kate to name a few of his crimes." James spoke like a tradesman advertising his wares.

"Is he the leader of the Others?"

"No, the leader of the Others is dead, this man was his second in command. Now how 'bout we take him to that hatch of yours Jacko, so Ali here can interrogate him real nice an' friendly like?"

Nodding his assent to the suggestion, Jack said, "Let's go, you know the way."

As the three men started to march to the hatch, James asked, "Where's Kate an' Eko?"

"Funny I was going to ask you the same thing, Sawyer." At that response, James stopped and looked at Jack in mounting fear.

"You mean they ain't back yet?"

"No. They ran off in the middle of the night two nights ago to look for you."

Untying the rope from his wrist, James handed Jack the rope with a look of dismay on his face. Turning away from the two men he ran into the jungle, with the ironclad grip of fear on his heart.

"Sawyer!" Jack yelled, as he started to run after him. Sayid held him back, "I'll go after him, in the meantime get the prisoner to the hatch. I will meet you there when I get back."

Jack shook his head in disagreement, but Sayid had already taken off after Sawyer, to follow them with the injured Other would be folly so he just took the man to the hatch instead.


	16. Chapter 16

**Chapter 16**

Kate was scared, Eko had left her with the Emma and her brother Ben, and had taken the other nine children with him to the beach. The oldest of the children was ten years old and the other eight were between the ages of five and nine. It surprised Kate to no end how they did not show signs of tiring, never spoke and were all generally so disciplined it scared her. It wasn't natural for children to be so sedate, she couldn't wait until they were all on the beach and she would be able to question them.

They had decided to let Eko go with the children leaving her with Emma and Ben because he could move silently with them and Kate's legs had refused to cooperate. It galled her to admit that she was worse for wear after the last few days and needed to rest. Clutching the children to her swiftly beating heart as she heard footsteps approaching, Kate shakily cocked the 9mm she was holding in her right hand. Pointing the gun at the spot she was expecting someone to appear, she pressed her back against the cave wall and felt the children tense in her arms. Breathing a sigh of relief she saw it was Eko. He motioned for her to release the children and she did. The children ran to Eko as if they were afraid of Kate and had been too polite to say so. Kate felt a little twinge of betrayal at their shift of allegiances. 'Whatever, at least we're okay. Kids don't like me anyway.'

Drawing herself up she followed Eko and the children out of the caves and towards the beach. They were all still walking barefoot, especially since her boots had been left behind outside the secret entrance to the Others' camp. Halfway back to thebeach Eko heard someone approaching, frantically Kate looked for a place to hide, whispering to Eko, "Take the children and go! I'll only slow you guys down. I'll find somewhere to hide!"

As she spoke she spied a hollow in the earth behind a bush, running over to it, she kicked at the dirt with her foot and to her relief the dirt collapsed, providing a sort of burrow for her to hide in. Eko didn't hesitate taking the children with him as she had the gun still. He melded into the jungle with them leaving Kate shaking like a leaf in fear as she heard the footsteps approach. They passed her hiding place and she breathed a sigh of relief until she heard her pursuers stop and turn around, 'Oh God, Kate get it together!' She berated herself.

As she held her breath in fear, she tried not to think of what being in the enclosed dark space reminded her of. And she was succeeding until she felt something move against her back. Petrified, that something felt like a warm, muscle as it slid against her back and she didn't need to look to realize that she was sharing her hiding place with a large snake of some kind.

When it moved against her angrily slithering over her and out of the hole she swallowed the ice cold dread that gripped her so tightly she thought she was going to expire on the spot. She was so terrified she was shaking uncontrollably and she could feel the scream welling up inside her. She couldn't hear or see anything anymore she was so scared, all she could feel was the effort it was taking her not to cry out. Turning her mind inside itself she was back in the cage and reliving the nightmare.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

James was trying to think over the cresting waves of panic that were washing over him. He had found Eko and the two children as they ran towards the beach. Eko had told him he'd left Kate behind as she hid in hole in the ground of some sort. Luckily Sayid had taken the kids and James and Eko had retraced their steps to find Kate. That was twenty minutes ago.

"Where is she?" He hissed at Eko with mounting frustration.

"I don't know. See here are the tracks made by the Others, I think they brought Alex with them because this footprint is heavier than the other. I don't think they found her because if they had carried her away she would have been an additional weight on someone."

"Unless they didn't find her and are waiting in the shadows for us to lead them to her, or they are waiting for her to come out on her own." James said with dawning realization.

Eko looked at James sadly, "Wherever she is, we cannot risk her safety if she's still hidden by looking for her now. Either we endanger everyone by bringing more people to look for her or we wait until morning."

"That is unacceptable! We cannot wait until morning!" James hissed angry now.

"I don't see another way, do you?"Eko seemed aggrieved as he said this which made James feel a little better.

"You don't understand, she's afraid of the dark. She has nightmares, if she is still hidin' she is livin' through an unimaginable hell in her mind right now." James was whispering calmly now.

"Whatever hell she has to live in her mind is better than any reality she will have to face if we get her captured... or worse." Eko said, ever the voice of reason.

James sat on the jungle floor in acceptance of this argument, "I will wait here for mornin'. If the Others are close by either they make a move or leave." He spoke this loudly, he wanted them to hear if they were in the shadows listening.

Eko lumbered down opposite James and together they sat in wait for morning.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Around 5 a.m. James heard faint sounds in the bush that sounded like a retreat of some kind. Bone tired as he was he had stayed awake during the 2 hours that had preceded the sunrise. He couldn't have slept if his life depended on it, because _Kate's_ lifedepended on him staying awake.

Eko hadn't slept either, and the two men had just sat in the dark waiting with bated breath. Now he could see that Eko too heard the sound of retreat in the brush, waiting for another torturous ten minutes they finally sprang up, running to the place they thought Kate was hiding.

Eko was the first to speak as they saw the slither marks, "Either a python or a boa constrictor from the size of the marks. Pythons are very common in the South Pacific. Looks like she either scared it out of it's hole or it's in there with her now."

James glared at Eko, "I don't want to think it's in there with her now. It coulda killed her by now."

Eko took his club and used it to prod in the hole, after a few prods, James hunkered down and reached his arm into the hollow. He felt her leg, it was stiff with fear and she was shaking uncontrollably. Dragging her by the leg his heart sank in despair when he saw her face.

Kate could feel herself being dragged out of the oubliette, that's where it felt like she was. The cage, but this time it was in the ground and everybody had forgotten about her. 'I'm dying, I've been down here so long God has finally heard my prayers and he's releasing me from this hell. I didn't think my spirit leaving my body would hurt so much.'

James was scared, Kate's eyes were darting wildly from side to side and she was making a weird choking sound in the back of her throat. She'd been crying and the tracks of her tears had left dirty streaks down her filthy face. There was also dried snot on her upper lip and she was shaking so hard he was afraid the force of it was going to break her in half. Whiter than a sheet and half-crazed she flinched at the sound of his voice, "Kate! It's me, it's Sawyer, it's okay, I got you. I won't let anythin' happen to you ever again. You're safe."

Her eyes seemed to register something at the name 'Sawyer' and the word 'safe'. Eko, uncurled Kate's fingers off the gun she was gripping tightly, with the safety off. James had her in his arms and was trying to hold her but she was shaking and started to resist. "Kate! Talk to me please, look at me, sweetheart."

She threw her head back and started screaming, wincing James tried to tighten his hold on her. She started to fight back screaming a blood curdling scream as she head butted him and struggled to get out of his grip.

"Sonofabitch! Freckles, stop it!"

She was fighting in earnest now, her pupils dilated like two pennies, it took both James and Eko to hold her down as she bucked and fought like a woman possessed. Finally, James had to knock her out using a pressure point because he didn't want to hurt anymore than necessary.

Suddenly she stopped screaming and with a sigh was in a deep sleep. Eko looked at James like he had never seen him before, "Where did you learn how to do that?"

"Right now we got bigger things to worry 'bout than where I picked up a nifty trick like that, would'tcha say?" He was angry at himself and at Eko for what Kate had gone through in that hole. If he was to be honest with himself, he was afraid that the stint in the hole had sent her over the edge.

Lifting her limp body in his arms James and Eko walked back to their camp, in worried and more than a little guilty silence.

Taking her to the hatch, James never thought he would be so happy to see Jack. "Help us please!"

Jack rushed over to James concern clouding his features, "What happened? Where did you find her?"

"In a snake's burrow, she was there for a spell and she's kinda gone off the wall."

"Why is she unconscious did you find her like this?"

Ana-Lucia, Sayid and Locke all looked on in with curiosity as James briefly explained what happened. When he had finished Jack's face was grim, "Did you hit her to knock her out?"

"No!" James yelled, agitated.

"So how did you get her like this, she's out cold Sawyer!"

"It's a Dar Mak energy draining technique." James answered, angry at Jack, Eko, Kate and most of all himself.

"What the hell is that?" Jack asked rudely.

"It's an energy draining pressure point, it's not lethal and only martial artists of the highest rank are taught it because it can be lethal if used incorrectly." Sayid offered. All eyes swiveled to look at James in surprise.

"She's wakin' up Doc, now why dontcha do what all those years of med school were supposed to have taught ya and treat her?"

Turning back to Kate, Jack approached her where she lay on the kitchen counter, "Kate are you alright?"

She looked at Jack in confusion and fear, recoiling from him when he tried to touch her.

"Where is he?" She croaked out in tiny voice.

"I'm right here Freckles."

Looking at him with relief she threw her arms around him and started to cry, "Oh God, I thought I was going to die in there. I thought I would never see light again, it was so horrible! When that snake slithered over me… I wanted to scream, and I couldn't and I just wanted you to get me out of there, I was there for so long!"

"Hush now, sweetheart, it's over now, you're home and you're safe. We're all safe. Don't think 'bout that anymore, ok. I'm here, I'm not goin' anywhere." As he soothed her she now began to cry in earnest, crying heartbreaking sobs as she clung to him like he was the only thing stopping her from drowning.

Jack looked on uselessly, chafing at her dismissal of him, looking over at Ana-Lucia he saw that the former cop looked quite upset by the way the couple were holding each other so closely.

Sayid, Eko and Locke both withdrew from the room trying to give James and Kate some privacy but Jack and Ana-Lucia stood there in jealous paralysis.

Finally, Kate stopped crying, looking up at James in a slightly embarrassed voice she asked, "Where's Emma and Ben? Tex, the kids, where are they? What about Eko?"

"They're all fine, Sweetcheeks, the only one from our party I'm worried 'bout now is you. I think you need to get some sleep, and some hot food down that skinny frame of yours." As he spoke he helped her off the counter top, wrapping an arm around her waist to support her. Kate looked up at him, not even noticing the other two in the room.

"Thank you. For getting me out of that hole, for saving our lives at the Others Camp, for being this incredibly resourceful person…everything, really." She wrinkled her nose when she said 'everything'.

Smiling down at her for the compliment, James replied, "On second thought, I think ya should take a shower first, ya look like-"

He didn't get to finish his sentence because she punched him in the arm, hard, "Didn't your momma teach you it was rude to highlight a lady's faults Tex?"

"Well Freckles, ya sure don't look or smell like any lady I ever seen."

Rolling her eyes at him she detached herself from him, "Fine I am going to take a shower!" As he made to follow her, she added, "Alone!"

Holding his hands up in surrender James flashed her his dimples, "Just holler if ya need any help gettin' those hard to reach places."

Shaking her head as she smiled she walked past Ana-Lucia, sneaking in an arched eyebrow at the Latina that neither James nor Jack saw.

Ana-Lucia turned to look at James with her trademark angry sneer on her face, James laughed and shook his head. "I don't wanna hear it. I'm tired, hungry, dirty an' all I want is to go to sleep."

James could feel Jack's eyes boring holes into his back as the surgeon fumed silently. Turning to refrigerator, James opened it and pulled out a carton of milk and shutting it with his foot, rummaged in the overhead cupboard for some cereal.

Ana-Lucia bent over to get some bowls out of the bottom cupboard, and placed them on the counter top. Grabbing a banana she started to peel it briskly then sliced it into small thin pieces.

Jack sauntered over to James, "What's Dar Mak and why do you know it, Sawyer?"

James ignored him and asked Ana-Lucia to pass him some banana which she did. Smiling his thanks at her he poured his cereal into the bowl, then milk, before adding the banana to the top. Skirting Jack he walked to one of the stools and sat down to munch on his cereal, with a smile of pleasure at the simple food on his face.

Jack moved to go to James and Ana-Lucia restrained him, shaking her head at him wordlessly. Jack frowned, 'What kind of alternate reality was this? Now Sawyer had Ana-Lucia pandering to him. What the hell is wrong with the women on this Island?'

"I'd listen to her Jack, she's got a good head on those toned shoulders." James spoke absently without even looking at him, as he devoured his cereal.

Leaving him to it Jack stomped off to find Kate and see if she was okay. He got to the bathroom door and realized he couldn't barge in on her in the middle of her ablutions. Thinking back to the time he had seen her in the shower he sighed in frustration, 'Those were simpler times. Didn't have Deadbeat Southern Asshole around stealing all my women.'

Changing his mind he went back to the kitchen, and sat at the breakfast table with James and Ana-Lucia who were having an engrossed conversation in rapid Spanish.

"No hay Ana-Lucia, este individuo su líder verdadero, yo observó a esta gente por casi 24 horas, yo sabe de lo que estoy hablando. Zeke justo el segundo en comando, sin su líder y su segundo en el comando que el campo será en caos. Esta mañana era su tentativa pasada de la zanja de ser coordinado, yo le apostó mi dólar ese pandemonium pasado explotado en ese campo." (_Translation: No Ana-Lucia, this guy was their real leader, I observed these people for almost 24 hours, I know what I'm talkin' 'bout. Zeke's just the second in command, without their leader an' their second in command that camp will be in chaos. This mornin' was their last ditch attempt to be coordinated, I bet you my last dollar that pandemonium's broken out in that camp._)

"¿Cómo puede usted ser seguro? Tenemos los cabritos y los desean tan gravemente. ¿Cómo puede usted ser seguro que cualquier cosa que usted vio era el reparto verdadero?" (_Translation: How can you be sure? We've got the kids and they want them so badly. How can you be sure anything you saw was the real deal?_)

James had finished eating his cereal at this point, "I'm sure, because no one saw me comin' Cupcake." James replied in English this time.

That seemed to satisfy her because she stopped asking questions and actually acknowledged Jack's presence.

"What do you think Jack?"

"About what? I don't speak Spanish."

"Do you think that the Others have been diffused as a threat?"

"I don't know, Sawyer hasn't told us anything yet about what happened out there so how can I say."

"In a nutshell, he killed their leader, his bodyguard, shot Zeke in the leg and his bodyguard Alex, got the kids, disarmed the entire camp, and here we are." Kate said, as she walked into the room refreshed. She still looked exhausted and was still very pale but at least she was wearing clean clothes because she always kept a spare set in the hatch. Her hair was wet and curly as ever, and her eyes were sparkling with amusement.

"Give or take a near death by firing squad here, and nightmare hiding place there."

"Cereal's for you Princess." Said Ana-Lucia as she gestured to the bowl that she'd filled with cereal and sliced banana.

"Thank you, Ana-Lucia." Kate said,in a cautious toneas she poured some milk on it then walking over to James' newly vacated seat, sat down and devoured it with the same zest he had exhibited 15 minutes ago.

James had already headed for the shower, and Jack took it as an opportunity to berate Kate. "What you did was foolish to the nth power Kate. Sneaking off into the jungle in the middle of the night when you and I had agreed we'd wait until morning. I was beside myself with worry. We couldn't find you and had _no_ idea which way you had gone by the time we discovered you were gone. Sawyer doing that was bad enough but for _you_ to follow him and not tell anyone-"

"I told Hotlips Jack." Kate spoke over a mouthful of cereal before she carried on eating.

"What is with everyone calling each other everything but their own names?" Jack asked, exasperated beyond belief by Kate's attitude.

"You made it clear finding Sawyer wasn't a priority of yours and I felt that if we waited we'd never find him alive. Eko came of his own free will, I told Hotlips where we were going so I don't see what the big deal is Jack."

"The _big deal_ Kate is that you got captured, and you slept in a snake pit where you had at for lack of a better word, some sort of mental breakdown."

"I've been captured before Jack, and compared to many people on this Island I got off lightly. The snake pit wasn't scary it was the memories it brought up that… upset me, it was my choice to hide because I didn't want to endanger the children and Eko. It was my decision to make Jack."

A silence descended over the room as Kate rose to make some coffee, and wash hers and James' bowls. As soon as the coffee finished brewing, she poured some coffee for all of them silently handing Jack and Ana-Lucia a mug each.

When James returned to the kitchen, Kate was standing by the sink in silent reflection and everyone else seemed to be lost in thought. Sitting down at the seat he'd vacated for Kate earlier, Jack was the first to speak.

"When'd you manage to squeeze in time for a haircut Sawyer."

James smirked at the question, "While I was observing the camp, I noticed none of 'em had long hair, so I used my huntin' knife in an attempt to blend in."

"What happened out there?" Jack demanded.

"I killed their leader, never caught his name but he was 'bout 6 foot 8 so I called him André. They had a much bigger hatch, an' computers that transmitted off this Island. Had Walt in a hut, hooked to all types of machines an' tubes, looks like they were doin' tests on him. André said we weren't ever gonna get rescued. This Island operation has connections in high places, a lot of money and careers are restin' on whatever the hell lil' operation they're runnin' here."

All of them were listening to James intently, Locke and Sayid had also wandered into the room and were standing riveted to the spot.

"What do you mean by connections?" Asked Ana-Lucia.

"André said that world governments were involved an' our plane was the first plane of a commercial scale that had _successfully_ crashed with so many survivors. Said there'd been a number of failed attempts in the last 20 odd years." Everyone in the room gasped at this.

"Think that's bad? 'pparently, some of the people on our plane were _supposed_ to be here. All part of whatever elaborate plan they had."

Everyone sat there in stunned silence trying to digest this new information. Reaching into his jean pockets James pulled out some vials, "Figured you'd be able to figure out whatever it was these folks were doin' as you're the Doc an' all. I took the morphine 'cause I thought it'd just be useful. But these other ones, maybe you'll recognize what type of medication they've been druggin' Walt with."

He dropped them into Jack's open palms, the surgeon looked at James with grudging respect. Inspecting the vials, Jack looked up at James in alarm, "This is sodium thiopental!"

"Truth serum." James explained in response to Kate's questioning gaze.

"And this is pancuronium bromide."

"Ya lost me there Doc."

"Don't they use that in the lethal injection?" Asked Ana-Lucia.

"Yeah, they do, it works as a muscle relaxant and it also masks pain. So does this one, Secobarbital." Responded Jack distractedly.

Looking at the other vials, he looked around at everyone in the room, "They've been brainwashing him. Trying to get into his mind as a form of narcoanalysis."

"So how do we know if they succeeded Jack?" Demanded Locke, impatiently.

"We don't. We'll have to talk to him. We also need to get Zeke for lack of a better name to talk." Turning to James, Jack said, "You did good Sawyer."

James didn't want to but couldn't help but feel good at the compliment, "Yeah well I've gotta drag my ass to a bed otherwise I'll fall asleep right here." With that comment he made to leave the hatch.

Placing her cup in the sink Kate piped up, "I'll come with you. I don't think I can stay awake much longer and I don't want to stay here."

Offering his arm to her she took it and arm in arm they walked out of the hatch together.


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter 17**

Kate and James slept under the shadow of a palm tree in the open, neither one of them had wanted to sleep in their tents or secretly, part from the other.

The beach was abuzz with the story of James' daring rescue of Walt and the other children. The presence of the children had restored flagging faith that rescue and good things were going to happen. Rose had immediately taken a mothering role, gathering the children and organizing food, bathsand gamesfor them. She wouldn't let them sleep because she wanted them to sleep at night.

Everyone looked at the sleepingpair with renewed interest but tried not to make too much noise or wake them. Not that it would have mattered because they were fast asleep. Eko had gone to his tent and slept in there, practically robbed of speech with exhaustion.

**That evening**

Kate glanced over at James who was still fast asleep and breathed a sigh of relief. 'Oh God I thought I'd lost him for good this time.' The last rays of orange sunset gilded him with a beautiful glow. She didn't know when the way she felt about him had ceased to be a matter of contention in her head but here she was. After Jack's high handed manner with her this morning she was thankful the Southern charmer had survived if only to keep her sanity. Kate couldn't wait until he woke up so she could tell him she was sorry about before and beg his forgiveness.

"Freckles you're staring at me with a slightly crazy look on your face."

"I'm sorry about the way we parted a few days ago, Tex. I was out of line on so many levels. I shouldn't have spoken to you or left your tent the way I did that night." The words came out in a rush.

Closing his eyes in frustration, James sat up and looked ather, dismayed that she'd just launched into a conversation he wasn't prepared for.

"Had to get that off your chest did ya?"

Tucking her legs beneath her she faced him, leaning close, "I'm serious. No games this time. Just the truth! I don't ever want to feel that there are things unsaid between us. That night in your tent meant a whole lot more than I made it look like it did. I have never felt… I've never been…So…"

Giving up on trying to conjugate her feelings into words, she looked up at him through her lashes in an unconsciously seductive gaze as she bit her lip in frustration.

James looked at her with an aching heart, lifting his hand to her face and stroking her cheek he spoke gruffly, "You don't owe me any explanations, Freckles, well actually ya do, but it don't matter really… I know."

She beseeched him with her eyes, turning her face into his hand, an act of surrender.

"I also know that you and I are strangers Freckles and despite what you feel me, you're saving a part of yourself for Dr. Jones over there."

Sadly, he let his hand fall to his side, getting to his feet, "The day you figure what's real and what you do want, just may be the day we get of this fuckin' Island." His voice was heartbreaking; there was so much regret and pain in it.Walking away in his long legged strides he left her kneeling in the sand, just as Jack was walking towards her.

"Good morning, you sleep well? I resisted interrupting your siesta under the palm tree for as long as I could. I am glad I didn't have to face the wrath of Sawyer, he looks angry… again."

Kate looked up at Jack in annoyance, petulantly propping her hands on her now drawn up knees and staring out to sea.

"Lovers tiff?"

Kate tsked in anger, "What do you want Jack?"

"I just wanted to know if you were okay, you scared us this morning."

"Don't you have sick people who actually are in _need_ of your help to tend to?"

Jack was flabbergasted at the rudeness of her tone, "What's the matter Kate, this is unlike you."

"You don't know me Jack, how would you know what I am like?"

She stubbornly refused to look up at him. Jack sat down next to her, "I know you're stubborn, and brave and just generally a very resourceful woman. You've had a very action-packed life and been in situations I know must have been hard for you. Am I way off the mark here?"

"_Action packed_? Is that what they call it in your social circles? Is that the PC way of saying I am a criminal?" She was being unduly harsh but she didn't care, she was hurting and she wanted him to feel her pain.

Jack stared at her for a long time, eventually he gave up and left her there.

Half an hour later, Eko approached her with a plate of food, leaning down he picked up one of the blankets and wrapped it around her shoulders.

"You looked happier sleeping in a tree in the middle of the day, with blisters on your bare feet."

"I was. Thank you. And I'm still barefoot, lost my boots remember?" She accepted the proffered plate gratefully, realizing she was starving.

Taking a bite of boar she closed her eyes to relish the flavor of the chewy and hot meat.

"Mmm that is so good. Take a seat and eat with me." She patted the spot on the blanket next to her.

Eko accepted and sitting next to her the two of them ate in silence.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"He's right you know, I don't know him and I don't know what I want."

Eko didn't say anything, he just looked at her encouragingly.

"I never in my wildest imaginings thought he spoke Spanish, could disappear in a jungle like that… just generally everything he did at that camp showed me how little I really know him. And I don't know how to go about finding out either."

"Perhaps you should just ask him and go from there." Eko spoke sagely.

Smiling at him she shook her head softly, "Now why didn't I think of that?"

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Still feelingtired, Kate gathered James' blankets and took them to his tent, crashing into it as she tripped on the tarp, she fell on top of the sleeping man, waking him up with a start.

"Sonofabitch! Kate! Whatcha doin' here?"

He'd rolled over and tackled her to the floor his bruising grip on her hands relaxing when he realized it was her.

"I came to bring you back your bedding." Kate felt her breath catch in her throat at the position they were in. Even with the blankets trapped between their bodies she felt like she was being lit on fire from within. He looked so dangerous and sexy with his new and crudely shorn locks. The new hairstyle made his molten eyes positively glow in his face.

"Thanks." He grunted irritably, hauling himself off her, much to Kate disappointment.

James wasn't immune to the fire that seemed to be raging inside her but he steeled his resolve and helping her up said, "There's less disruptive ways to return other people's property, Freckles."

Kate smiled, "You know me, I always go for the most physical way."

He looked down at her wistfully, "Yeah I guess I know that."

He released her hand like he'd been burned and sat down on his makeshift bed. It was dark in the tent and they could barely see each other, meaning all their other senses were heightened.

He could smell the intoxicating perfume of Kate and the desire that was radiating off her and curling itself around him in tendrils.

Approaching him and kneeling between his legs, Kate looked at James with naked desire in her eyes.

James groaned in frustration, he tried to move away from her but her elbows were on his knees trapping him.

"No, Kate."

"Yes." She breathed forcefully. Leaning in to kiss him, James couldn't move as he saw her lips approaching his.

At the touch of her lips on his he knew he'd lost, wrapping his arms around her he lifted her up onto his lap, deepening the kiss.

She kissed him greedily, like she couldn't get her fill of him, nipping his upper lip with her teeth. She pushed him back so she lay on top of him, straddling him she pressed her breasts against his chest as she continued her arduous onslaught. She was on fire and she wanted him to burn with her.

James struggled to keep a lid on his emotions as she pleasurably assaulted him with her mouth, tongue and body. For the life of him he couldn't form a coherent thought let alone summon the will to stop this. As if watching from afar he saw himself unbuckling her belt and sliding her jeans down her hips. Bringing his hands back up as she kicked the jeans off to cup her butt. He squeezed the panty clad supple flesh and was rewarded by the reflexive thrust of her pelvis against his.

Kate fumbled with James' jeans, much to her delight once again he wasn't wearing any underwear, this time she broke the kiss in order to take the time to pull his jeans off his long legs, and admire the impressive specimen that stood proudly against his belly.

Next to come off was her shirt and then his, unhooking her hand with one bra as they resumed their tonsil hockey, Kate pulled her own underwear off, kicking the panties somewhere. Naked they paused to look at each other in mounting passion, her hair was unbound and one particularly thick strand curled around her left breast. James reached to touch the strand, pushing it away so he could get an unobstructed view. Kate turned around doing a little twirl, flashing him a saucy look over her shoulder before she faced him again.

James pressed himself against her and slid his hands down her smooth shoulders and toned arms. "Beautiful." He whispered throatily. Tilting her head to look up at him as she stroked his flanks and replied, "So are you."

James pulled her up against him and then tossing her on his bed, practically pounced on her. Kate giggled softly and welcomed him into her arms, drowning in their passionate embrace.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"You bit me again, Sassafras."

Kate looked at him with sleep heavy eyes, smiling sexily she said, "I know."

He was wearing his jeans again, and standing against the wall with an unlit cigarette in his tawny fingers, his eyes raked her naked form hungrily, "So you planning on sleepin' here, _like that_?"

Laughing to herself she stretched luxuriously on his makeshift bed before sitting up, "No and no. I am going to sleep in my own tent with clothes _on_." James nodded, waiting for her to say something else.

She didn't; she was too busy trying to locate her clothes, giving up at his lack of helpfulness, Kate pulled on her jeans without the missing underwear, then picking up her bra and tossing it on the bed, she pulled on her shirt. Walking up to James she kissed him soundly, re-igniting the flames, she drew back, stunned by the swiftness of boththeir reactions to the kiss.

"Careful Sass, don't start somethin' you ain't plannin' on finishing."

Shaken by the kiss, Kate stepped away from him reluctantly, "Do you think anyone heard us?"

"I doubt it, we were quiet as church mice. I've got the bite mark and you've got the bruises on your hips to show it." They were speaking in hushed voices and Kate couldn't help but find the secrecy a turn on.

Picking up her bra she strode to the entrance, peeking out of the tent to see if anyone was around, she whispered, "Good night, Tex." Blowing him a kiss she disappeared into the inky night.

James sighed to himself emerging out of his tent to go sit by the surf and smoke his cigarette.

'She's gonna drive you crazy James. She wants to sleep with ya, but she doesn't want anyone to know 'cause she's ashamed. You're fallin' hard for her and I don't think it's wise to continue to let her do this to you.' As he chided himself angrily for being so susceptible to Kate's charms, James dug his feet in the cold surf. He needed something to take his mind off the temptress and he knew just what would do the trick. Flicking his finished cigarette into the ocean he retrieved the gun in his tent, shrugged on a shirt and walked to the hatch to have a long overdue talk with Zeke.


	18. Chapter 18

**Chapter 18**

He found Ana-Lucia in the hatch, smiling at her he said, "You really need to get out more Ana-Lulu you're startin' to look real pale."

"Hey, what are you doing here?" She asked an answering smile on his face.

"Came to get some answers from Zeke… and take a shower."

Ana-Lucia nodded, "You're gonna have to take a number Cucinero, Kate's in the shower at the moment."

James' nostrils flared slightly at this, "What's that now? What the hell was she doin' walkin' over here on her own at night?"

"I don't know, Miho, but she's in the shower now. Funny how both of you came here to take a shower."

"Yeah, I'm bustin' a gut here."

Ana-Lucia laughed out loud at the wry expression on his face when he said that. Smiling slightly he sat down next to her on the couch.

"Why are you always in here?"

"The prisoner we shall call Henry Gale. I'm working on him, and I don't trust anyone else with the responsibility. 'Sides it gives me something to do."

"I thought you might be hidin'."

"That too."

James sat next to her in silence, Ana-Lucia shifted so that she was facing him, "The other prisoner, the one you call Zeke, he's been pretty quiet. Hasn't given me lip or anything."

"You disappointed?"

"Just a little bit." Ana-Lucia admitted.

"Well, soon as I take a shower, I'm gonna go an' ask him a couple questions, somethin' tells me he won't stay quiet for long by the time I'm done with him."

"It's good to have you back James. Finally someone has done something about Them. What do you think their camp is like now?"

"Like I said before all hell's probably broken loose over there."

"It's about time if you ask me, they've terrorized us survivors for so long."

"Someone said, 'You can discover what your enemy fears most by observing the means he uses to frighten you.' Wise someone."

"You're really somethin' you know that? I didn't let myself hope you'd be able to pull it off and you did."

Looking at Ana-Lucia seriously James lowered his voice, "I didn't do it alone. She was there with me, I don't know how but she was. The success of this entire venture is because of her."

"What are you guys talking about?" Kate interrupted with false cheer.

Getting up quickly, James ignored her, "Looks like the shower's free." He walked past Kate, nodding briefly at her as he passed.

Kate watched him leave then turned back to Ana-Lucia who had a faint sneer on her face. "Guess he didn't wanna share."

Kate looked at the former cop with mild distaste, "I'm surprised Hotlips, thought you'd be over sneering at everything and everyone by now. I guess it was too much to hope for a little change in you."

"That's exactly what I was thinking about you."

"Throwing my criminal past in my face is getting a little old don't you think?"

"Not at all, it still gets a reaction out of you." Ana-Lucia sneered whole-heartedly.

Kate rolled her eyes in feigned boredom, sitting at the computer she studied Ana-Lucia.

"I can see right through you, even if he can't, that's why you don't like me."

"He doesn't need your misguided protection Kate, James is a grown man, he can take care of himself and he actually has a past to be proud of."

"What exactly is that past?"

"It's not my story to tell… sorry." Ana-Lucia did not sound apologetic in the slightest, rising from her seat she went into the kitchen.

"Want some coffee?"

"Yeah sure." Kate replied brightly, deep down she was simmering with anger at the Latina's comment. 'What did he do in his past to warrant her never ending respect? And who the hell was Catalina?'

Before she could stop herself, she asked, "Who is Catalina?"

Ana-Lucia walked back into the kitchen with two mugs of coffee, "My cousin."

"Is she back in LA?"

"No. She's in Antigua, Guatemala."

"She lives there?"

"No."

Kate sighed, "What's your problem?"

"You are." With that Ana-Lucia left Kate alone in the room to go and check on Gale then Zeke.

James sauntered in the room, smelling fresh and looking good, he was topless.

"You drive her away?"

Kate didn't dignify the question with a response, "Who's Catalina?" She asked for the second time that night.

James looked like he'd hit her, "None of your business." He ground out, spearing her with his angry gaze he walked out of the room.

Kate wanted to scream, 'Who is this woman? What is the big secret?' Instead she picked up the discarded copy of Moll Flanders and decided to read.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"You an' me are gonna have ourselves a real nice conversation, Frank." James spoke in a controlled voice. He was in the room they were keeping the injured man in; alone. Ana-Lucia had wished him luck and was waiting outside the door.

Frank looked at James with ill-disguised loathing, "I don't feel like talkin'."

"We'll see about that won't we?" James crushed his bare foot onto the bullet wound in the man's upper right leg.

"Okay! What do you want to know?" Jame was a little disappointed at the easy capitulation, this man had nearly got him killed on the raft.

"What's your last name, Frank?"

"Mandelsson!"

"How did you know my name?"

"Same way I know everyone else's names."

"How's that?"

"Flight manifest and seating plan, we got those before y'all even crashed!"

Releasing the pressure on the sweating man's leg, James crouched down to Frank's level.

"Go on."

"That's all. I've never seen you before y'all landed here."

"You're lyin', I can see it in your eyes."

"I'm not."

"Yes you are. Hear this 'cause I'll only say it once, if you don't cooperate with me, I'll break somethin' until ya do. Understood?"

The look of barely contained violence convinced Frank that this wasn't a bluff. Yet something made him hold back.

Sighing in annoyance, James grabbed the man's right arm and broke a finger, "Talk to me Frank."

Frank screamed over and over againin pain, bringing Kate and Ana-Lucia running, they burst into the room and froze at the tableau in front of them. James was about to break another finger, "Stop! Please! I'll talk." The other man sobbed, hunching over as he weaklytried to protect his wounded leg and finger at the same time.

James didn't release the man's hand, so hurriedly Frank started to talk, "I didn't recognize you as you are now but I know you from a long time ago. Last time I saw you, you were about eight…. I was courtin' your Momma, to get your Daddy's money."

James released the man's hand and sat back in shock. "No." He breathed in a horrified and broken voice.

The words were tumbling out of Frank's mouth like an avalanche building steam as it rolled down a mountain.

"I didn't know your Daddy would react the way he did! It wasn't part of the plan…. You can understand ma surprise when I saw your name on the flight manifest and heard everyone else callin' you Sawyer. When I took a real good look at ya, I realized you had your Momma's eyes and her smile, that's when I knew that you were that little boy."

James was frozen on the floor, Kate and Ana-Lucia stood in the doorway transfixed.

"I did my best to make sure you wouldn't get hurt, figure'd it would be a way to atone."

"You took ma parents away from me you sonofabitch! Nothin' you could possibly do on this damn Island can _atone_ for that!" James railed in a blind rage, he lunged for the man and Kate jumped to stop him.

She pulled at his shoulders ineffectually as he strangled Frank with the intent to kill.

"Tex no! Please, let him go! You don't want to do this!" James shrugged her off and shoved her into the wall angrily. Kate hit her head on the wall, hard, slightly dazed she watched in helpless distress as Frank's face started to turn blue while he gasped for air.

Ana-Lucia knelt next to James, stroking his hair she spoke to him in a gentle yet forceful voice, "Venido en querido, déjelo van. Ésta no es la manera, lo dejó va. Necesitamos saber qué más él sabe, nuestra misma supervivencia dependemos de ella. Déjelo ir, por favor." (_Translation: Come on darling, let him go. This is not the way, let him go. We need to know what else he knows, our very survival depends on it. Let him go, please._)

Kate watched in mesmerized fascination as James suddenly released Frank, aghast he turned into Ana-Lucia's arms in defeat. Frank lay on the floor gasping for air, tears streaming down his face. Ana-Lucia gently soothed James in Spanish, stroking his hair and rocking him slightly as he held on to her tightly.

Kate felt like killing the woman, there was no two ways she wanted the Latina dead. 'Get your hands off my man!' She thought furiously.

James pulled away from Ana-Lucia and looked at her with despairing eyes, "Él arruinó mi vida. No puedo dejarlo vivir. Déjelo vivir va contra todo que soy, todo he _**estado siempre**_. Él arruinó mi vida. ¡Él mató a mis padres!" (_Translation: "I can't let him live. To let him live goes against everything that I am, everything that I **have ever been**. He ruined my life, he killed my parents!_")

Ana-Lucia looked at him compassionately, but her voice was steely, "Sé, pero ésta no es la manera. Las vidas de la gente ahora dependen de usted. No pierda de vista la misión de vista. Los individuos no importan, usted tienen que hacer cuál ahora es en cada uno los mejores intereses." (_Translation: "I know, but this is not the way. Other people's lives depend on you now. Don't lose sight of the mission. Individuals don't matter, you have to do what is in everyone's best interests now_.)

Nodding dejectedly, James didn't turn as he spoke, "You alright Freckles?" Kate rose to her feet unsteadily, "Yeah, I'm fine."

He turned to look at her, a world of anguish in his eyes, "Come on let's get outta here. Don't think we'll get much more out of him tonight." Rising he took her arm and guided her out of the room. Ana-Lucia stayed behind to make sure Frank was okay, giving him some water before she bound and gagged him. His eyes thanked her silently for her intervention. "Don't thank me just yet. I'd like nothing more than to see him kill you."

James and Kate were in the kitchen, he was looking for any signs of injuries from her collision with the wall. "Stop fidgetin' and let me see Freckles!"

"I'm fine! I'm more worried about you… are you okay?"

Giving up on trying to find any bruising, he avoided her eyes, "Yeah, Freckles I'm fine."

She cupped his face and forced him to look at her, "Hey, this is me you're talking to."

"I know." His hands flexed on her wrists convulsively before he pulled them away from his face.

"I just don't wanna talk 'bout it, you were in the room Freckles, ya heard what the man said, what else is there to talk about? Like Ana-Lulu said, we gotta focus on the big picture here. Information an' gettin' off this Island, neither of those things will necessarily be easier if I kill him now." His voice was flat and the churning emotions in his eyes were the only indication that he even cared about what he was saying.

Ana-Lucia walked in, "Kate can you excuse us a minute?"

Kate raised her eyebrows at the woman's nerve, James looked at her pleadingly. Relenting Kate went to the computer room, angry at the dismissal.

"Wanna tell me about the vision you had of Cat?"

James' nostrils flared at the mention of her name, "Not really."

"I think it's important. It led you to Them and that led you to discovering him, tell me about it."

James glared at her, "There's nothing to tell I saw her in the vision, I chased her through the jungle an' ended up at their camp. She accused me of breaking ma promise to her an' fell down the hatch. That's about it."

"Really?"

"Yeah, really!"

"What promise was she talking about James?"

James did not answer he was glaring at Ana-Lucia, madder than ever at her insensitivity.

"What promise James, you almost killed the guy! I need to know what your attack on the man was about!"

"I promised her I would take care of Rita that I would be there for her."

Ana-Lucia's expression softened, "Killing Frank won't help you keep that promise James. You know that right?"

"Yeah, Rambina I know." James answered exasperated.

'Who's Rita?' Kate wondered, she was eavesdropping but she didn't care. The two switched to Spanish and Kate couldn't understand what they were talking about. 'I have to find a way to get him to open up to me!' Kate thought desperately, tiptoeing to the computer so she didn't get caught.

Ana-Lucia and James rejoined her in the computer room in silence. Kate tried to look like it didn't bother her that the two of them had kicked her out of the kitchen to have a private conversation.

James sullenlycrashed on the couch and Ana-Lucia pivoted out of the room, shewent to sleep in the bunker. 'Yeah sure, Ana-Lucia I'll man the button. Thanks for asking.' Kate thought resentfully.

Watching James sleep she pondered on his connection with Ana-Lucia; they seemed to have Catalina in common and now Rita. Seeing as James was having visions of Catalina, Kate suspected the woman was dead. Was Rita her daughter with James? Or maybe it was Catalina's little sister or mother or something.

With the events of the last hour and a half it was hard to believe they had slept together again less than three hours ago!

'What is that about anyway? Are we having casual, secret sex? Is he my booty call?' Kate suppressed a giggle at the term, shedidn't know, what she did know was that she wasn't ready to tell anyone about it. Especially when she knew almost nothing about James, she could scratch sex off the list of possible ways to induce him to tell her anything about himself she thought ruefully.

**That morning**

Jack came in early in the morning, relieving Kate of her button duties. Thanking him, she woke James up and the two of them walked back to the beach. Ana-Lucia also left the hatch at Jack's behest and went to find the children, more than a little irritated with Kate's monopolization of the Southerner.

"Tex, I don't mean to be demanding or anything, but I would like for you to talk to me a little more." Katedecided to followEko's advice and go for the direct approach.

"What do you want me to talk to you about Freckles?" James asked in an amused but tired tone.

They were sitting under the palm tree they had slept under the day before, Kate had a blanket spread and she was lying on her back. James was sitting up, staring out at the ocean. He was glad she was so relaxed in his presence that she could lie down, there was something inherently trusting in the submissive pose.

Using his discarded shirt as a pillow, she studied his profile, "Catalina."

James looked down at her, "What about her?" He couldn't bring himself to say her name, it hurt too much.

"Who is she?"

"Okay Sassafras, I'll answer your questions if ya answer mine."

"Deal."

James searched her face to see if she was being serious, Kate returned his gaze unflinchingly. Sighing he turned to look back out to the water, "She was someone very close to me."

"What happened?"

"She died."

"Did y-"

"Not so fast Freckles, my turn."

"Okay."

"What's the story behind that toy plane of yours?"

Kate exhaled sharply she had known he'd ask but she still wasn't prepared!

"It belonged to my best friend."

"Seein' as I never saw you with it 'til we found that case, somethin' tells me the Marshal was safekeepin' it for your friend. Now how'd _he_ get his hands on it? Unless he _was_ your best friend, somethin' I find hard to believe."

Kate didn't respond for a long time, finally she said, "He died."

James leaned back so that he was resting on his elbows, turning to look at her he opened his mouth to speak. She cut him off before he said a word, "My turn, Tex. Did you love her?"

James stared at Kate for what seemed like an eternity, "Yeah Freckles, I loved her."

He paused to gather his thoughts, and Kate stared at him encouragingly, taking a deep breath he continued.

"She represented everythin' pure an' good an' worthwhile in my life. When she died she took that part of me with her."

Kate felt jealousy stir in her breast at the way he spoke of the woman; with love and reverence. Sitting up on her elbows she unconsciously mimicked his posture.

"I loved Tom too. That was his name. It was my fault he died. He was in the car with me and a police officer was shooting at me to get me to stop. I didn't… when I did stop to get out of the car, I realized that Tom was dead. The plane was in the car, and I left it there, the Marshal found it and kept it."

James' eyes were brimming with compassion, "That's a hard thing to live with Sassafras… I can see why that plane means so much to you."

It was Kate's turn to look out into the ocean, "It's my only link to the person I was before… everything else." Her voice was fraught with emotion.

"Damn you James! You always make me feel stuff I don't want to feel!" She cried in frustration, swiping angrily at the tears that had risen unbidden in her green eyes.

"You started this conversation Freckles!" James protested good-naturedly. 'She called me James!' He felt his spirits rise at that.

"Yeah well, you're easy to talk to!" She was laughing through her tears now, James instinctively wrapped an arm around her shoulder drawing her into a hug.

"No one on this Island has ever accused me of _that_ before." He was laughing softly as he spoke, lowering his head to smell her hair.

Sitting up Kate looked at him, "Will you stay out here with me while I take a nap? Unlike _some_ people I didn't get to sleep in the hatch."

"Yeah Sweetcheeks, I'll stay." James thought he was going to go blind at the brilliance of her smile. Lying back down on her blanket, she laid her head on his lap curling into him slightly.

'She must be mistakin' me for a Saint!' He thought exasperatedly, trying very hard not to let his thoughts stray down a sexual road. Stroking her hair he let her sleep, a pensive smile on his face.


	19. Chapter 19

**Chapter 19**

Walt approached James and the sleeping Kate under the tree. Sitting down next to James he whispered, "Is she sleeping?"

"Looks like it Squirt."

Walt wrinkled in a gesture not dissimilar to Kate's, "Why?"

"She was up all night in the hatch, guess she's tired."

"Oh."

James looked at the little boy with amusement, "You alright?"

Walt looked at the ground briefly before looking up at James, "I am now. Thanks to you S-"

"You can call me James, son."

"Why?"

"'Cause that's my real name."

"So then why did you tell people your name was Sawyer?"

"It's a long story, Shortround. James is my real name."

"I like it better than Sawyer."

"Yeah, I think I do too." James was smiling at the boy now.

Kate rolled her head off his lap curling onto her blanket and facing away from him. Rising at this he gestured for Walt to follow him a few yards away. They sat down on the sand, James crossing his legs. The capricious child sat down opposite him and crossed his legs too. James smirked at this.

"Mr. James, I wanted to thank you for rescuing me. If you hadn't got there when you did I don't know how much longer I could have held on."

"No problem Squirt, you don't have to thank me."

"I also thanked Ms. Catalina, she was always there when things looked like they were getting real bad."

James' eyes widened at the mention of Catalina's name, "You saw her again?"

"Yeah, she waved at me yesterday when we got back. I waved back and she was gone."

"Where did you see her?"

"By the tree Kate's sleeping under."

"Well I'll be damned."

"You shouldn't swear Mr. James."

"Sorry Squirt. So how do you know this woman you saw was Catalina?"

"Because she told me when they first took me from the raft."

"Maybe you can tell me everythin'you remember Squirt."

"I was on the boat with Mr. Frank and the other people, I was crying and Ms. Catalina sat down next to me. She told me not to cry, and that I had to be strong. Then she hugged me and sang this beautiful song to me, she smells like roses you know?I must've fallen asleep because when I woke up I was in the hut. I don't remember much after that because they started sticking needles in me and asking me all these questions."

Walt paused, as if he was struggling not to cry, James was on tenterhooks waiting to hear what had happened next.

"They told me my Dad was dead, and that everyone else would be dead too if I didn't do what they wanted me to do. They told me it was my fault because I was _special_. Then when they left me in the room Ms. Catalina came in the room and told me not to worry, that you were coming to find me and take me back to my Dad. She told me I had to fight what the medicine was doing to me. And that she would stay with me until you came… I asked her how she knew you were going to come and she said you would because you promised her."

Walt was looking up at James now, awe on his face and in his eyes.

"And just like she said you would, you came."

James felt torn, he didn't understand how this had happened or what it all meant. He was spiritual in his own way, he'd been trained to see and feel what others didn't, but nothing in his experiences of meditation had prepared him for this.

"I saw her too Squirt, she led me to you, that's how I found ya. Did you tell anyone else about her? Did anyone else see her?" He confided in the little boy.

"No Mr. James, she said it was our little secret and that I shouldn't tell anyone but you."

James nodded, part of him couldn't help but feel he was losing his mind.

Getting up Walt dusted his legs off, "I have to go Mr. James, like I said before, thank you."

James waved the thanks off, "See you later Squirt."

He remained seated on the sand wondering what the hell all of it meant, sighing he walked back to the tree and sat down again, glancing tenderly at Kate's sleeping form.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Jack marched to the beach in search of James and Ana-Lucia, when he'd checked on their new prisoner he'd been shocked to find the man's bullet wound bleeding, he had a broken finger and black eyes from the lack of oxygen courtesy of James' strangulation.

Neither one of them had warned him and he'd been horrified at the bruise marks on the injured man's neck and the general condition the man was in. Jack couldn't get the man to speak as his voice was totally gone and he'd never seen such a haunted look of fear in someone's eyes before.

Spying James sitting under the palm tree looking out at sea, as Kate lay sleeping with her head in his lap, Jack saw red.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?"

James looked up at the spinal surgeon, "What's that now?"

"I go check on Zeke to find him half dead from your hands, you tortured him, Sawyer!Something both you and Ana-Lucia failed to mentionwhen I came in this morning!"

"Frank."

"What?"

"His name is Frank." James slid Kate's head off his lap and walked down towards the water.

They were drawing a crowd; Ana-Lucia, Locke, Sayid, Michael, Eko and Hurley were all standing around listening to the exchange. As Jack followed James down to the water's edge everyone moved too.

"Frank Mandelsson." Locke's face dropped at this revelation, something James did not fail to notice.

"He's the conman that stole my parents' money when I was a little boy."

"You nearly killed a man to get revenge on someone conning your parents at least twenty years ago?" Jack asked incredulously.

Kate had woken up by now, the sound of Jack's incensed voice had penetrated the deep sleep she'd been in. Blearily looking around she saw there was some sort of commotion happening by the water's edge.

"Yeah, an' what about it?"

Jack with hishands on his hips,shook his head, "You are _not _to be trusted Sawyer, you run off into the jungle in the middle of the night and start a war with the Others. Exhibiting skills that lead me to think that you haven't been exactly truthful about who you are, then you nearly kill a man for some crime he may have committed against your family over twenty years ago. Who are you? What is with the pressure points, the hiding your tracks? Quite frankly all of it?"

"My name is James."

Jack narrowed his eyesat the other man in mounting anger.

"Whatever."

"I've picked up some skills here an' there Jack that's all there is to it. I tortured Frank to get answers. He said that he had a copy of the flight manifest and the seating plan _before_ we crashed."

"If someone was strangling me and breaking my fingers I would say anything _James_."

"Yeah well, since you've never had the pleasure of bein' tortured _Jackass_, I think I'll draw on my own personal experiences to judge whether a man is tellin' the truth or not when he's bein' tortured."

That hit a nerve, Jack shook his head in frustration.

"Yeah well thanks to your methods, the man can't speak his throat is so swollen."

"Excuse me for not carin'."

Kate was standing with the crowd now, watching the exchange between the two men with a concerned look on her face. Locke was limping off in the direction of the hatch and nobody but James seemed to realize this either.

"Looks to me like Frank has more than one fan." James said mockingly.

"What are you talking about?"

"Daniel Boone's on his way to the hatch right now, somethin' tells me he's not goin' to check on Frank's injuries."

Everyone whipped around to look at Locke's rapidlydeparting figure. Jack ran after him to find out what was going on.

"John! Where are you going?"

"Who's in the hatch right now Jack?"

"Libby. I left her there with Bernard, the two of them came to do their laundry."

"You shouldn't have left them there alone with the prisoners Jack!" Locke yelled at the surgeon.

"Why are you going there, John?"

"I'm going there because you left two very important prisoners with two people that do not have the capabilities of dealing with them or any situation that may arise."

"Fine that's one reason. Do you know this Frank?"

"No Jack, should I?"

Sayid had caught up with the two men and together they were heading for the hatch, "He's right Jack you shouldn't have left them alone with the prisoners. I don't trust Libby, something about her does not seem right. I'll run ahead."

With that the Iraqi sprinted for the hatch leaving Jack and the limping Locke to follow.

The crowd had dispersed, leaving James, Kate, Ana-Lucia, Michael standing by the water.

Michael spoke first, "Thank you for saving my boy. Whatever reasons you had going there, you have my everlasting gratitude."

James accepted the thanks, looking uncomfortable, "Yeah don't mention it Mickey."

Walking away from the group Michael went back to his tent where Walt was sleeping.

"You okay?" Ana-Lucia asked solicitously.

"Yeah." James replied.

"Gonna go see what's goin' on at the hatch, we'll talk later?" Ana-Lucia asked as she turned to walk away.

"No problem, keep an eye on things over there for me Cupcake."

Eko followed Ana-Lucia, leaving Kate and James alone.

"Do you think he's got much more information to give us?" Kate asked, seriously.

"I don't know Freckles. Guess we'll find out when he can talk again." James looked at her with conflicted eyes.

"What's wrong?"

"Somethin' I should be remembering is escapin' me. Somethin' important."

"How _do_ you know how to do all those things James?"

"Wouldn't you like to know?" He teased, with no intention of discussing this aspect of his past with her.

"Yeah I would. You were right yesterday, I don't know you, and I would like to get to know you."

James was slightly taken aback by her sincerity and the forthrightness she spoke with as she looked at him. Her eyes showed she wasn't lying and he felt trapped. Sighing because he knew he was about to give her what she wanted despite his misgivings; he sat back down under the 'TruthTree' as he now dubbed the palm tree.

"After ma parents died, I stayed with my father's sister Claire-Ann, she was married to a Canadian man who worked on a reserve in Saskatchewan. I lived on the reserve for two years an' whenAunt CeCegot cancer, ma Momma's relatives got a court order to have me brought back an' raised by them."

He waited for this to sink in, before continuing, "After that I lived with ma Momma's sister Vera an' her low-life hubby, they were rich an' child services felt that it would be a better environment for a twelve year old boy to grow up in. I went back up to the reserve once, when I ran away to see Aunt Cece, she was recoverin' from the cancer an' her prognosis was good. I stayed with 'em for a month celebrated ma fourteenth birthday up there, then they sent me back. I guess Vera called an' offered to pay for any and all medical bills if they stopped hidin' me an' sent me back. They weren't rich or nothin' must have been a hard decision to make, but back to Memphis I went."

Kate's eyes were full of sorrow and compassion as he told his story, studying her face for what seemed like forever, James dusted the seat of his jeans as he got up. "That's enough story tellin' for one day dontcha think?" He was staring out at the surf pounding on the beach.

"I gotta go talk to Ana-Lulu, just remembered that somethin' that was escapin' me."

With that he turned away and headed towards the hatch, leaving Kate standing there on her own with an unbidden possessive look on her face.


	20. Chapter 20

**Chapter 20**

James had lied, he didn't really need to go and talk to Ana-Lucia, he just had to get away from Kate. They were on the threshold of something, and he couldn't afford to lose his head when it was clear to him that nothing really had changed. She still was torn between him and Jack and she still didn't know him. Besides he had the small matter of dealing with Frank once and for all.

He went to the waterfall, the sun was setting but he needed some time to himself, and after his conversation with Walt earlier he needed to process the information. Meditation was the only way he could think of doing so successfully.

Sitting cross-legged on the rocks, he focused on the falling water, willing himself to relax and breathe properly. Turning his vision inward he felt everything fall away until he couldn't even hear the rush of the water.

Ana-Lucia found him by the waterfall, she'd seen him headed in that direction and had followed him discreetly. She watched from her hiding place as James meditated, slowly walking out to sit a small distance away from him and watch.

'He's incredible! How does he do it?' She thought to herself. She also pondered on last night's events, she had not known how his parents had died. Now a lot more things were starting to make sense. It looked like his ventures into the Latin American jungles had been motivated by more than just doing good deeds, it seemed to her the Southerner had been running away from his own tortured past too.

It was now completely dark and James was still in his trance-like state. Ana-Lucia wondered if she would have to wait all night for him to come out of it. She started to wish she had brought a sweater, it was getting cold and she was losing all feeling in her legs as she sat waiting.

Deep in meditation, James could see himself in the El Salvadorian forest with Catalina. She was eight months pregnant and they were arguing in the middle of nowhere. She had followed him out there and the mid-morning sun was beating down on them relentlessy.

Suddenly she hunched over and let out an anguished cry, "Jamie, I think I'm in labor!" Rushing over to hold her up, Catalina sank to the ground as her waters broke.

"Come on Cat, you can't have this baby here. The village is only 6 miles away, I'll carry you. Hold on okay."

Catalina shook her head, "I can't move, this baby is coming now!"

Clenching her teeth she growled as another contraction ripped through her. James lifted her up anyway and started to run with her in his arms. Screaming in pain she begged him to put her down. Her struggles were making it very hard to hold onto her and fearing that he would drop her, or fall on her, he gave in.

She lay down in the dirt, "You're gonna have to help me deliver this baby, I can't do this alone."

"Cat I have to go get help, you heard what the doctor told you last week, your hips are too narrow an' there's no way you can give birth to this baby normally. You'll need a caesarean an' I don't have anythin' on me but this gun. Last I checked guns don't deliver babies." He was desperate now, cold fear skating down his spine as he looked down at her pained face.

"I have to Jamie, you can't leave me here. No one knows where we are and there isn't any time."

"Cat if we stay here, you will die an' so will the baby."

Speaking through gritted teeth she pinned him with her chocolate brown eyes, "I don't care! If we try to go any further I will die. At least if we try to deliver this baby now, it may have a chance."

James' eyes widened at what she meant, she was willing to sacrifice her life for that of her unborn child!

"No Cat, you can't-" He was cut off as she let out another anguished scream, clenching his hand so tightly he thought she was going to crush it.

"Jamie! Help me, help my baby! Please!"

Nodding in dismay James went to check the progress under her skirt, what he saw curdled his blood. He could see the baby's head already! Making a choice he decided to do his damndest to deliver the baby alive. Besides, maybe someone from the village would come looking for them when they realized Catalina was missing.

"Okay, querida. I can see the head already, I need you to push real hard, we're in rebel territory, an' if ya continue screaming you're gonna draw unwanted attention on us. So please, keep it down." He spoke to her gently but the look on his face was hard and determined. He needed her to understand the precariousness of their situation.

Nodding her head in understanding, Catalina stifled her next scream and clenched his hand tightly.

"Okay."

"Okay. Now push as hard as you can querida."

Grunting in pain Catalina pushed as hard as she could, while James watched in horror as blood started to pour out. 'Oh God, she's gonna die if this continues. Don't panic now James, be cool, you can panic later.'

Looking at her encouragingly he kneeled behind her and held her knees up as she gasped for breath before pushing again.

Nine hours later, James reached in and pulled the blue-faced baby's body out of Catalina. She lay in an exhausted heap on the blood soaked dirt floor, James cleared the baby's nose and mouth and breathed into the still baby's mouth. 'Come on angel, breathe please!'

After a few more attempts, the little girl let out a choking sound then wailed thinly, laughing softly with relief, James wrapped the baby up in his shirt and crawled over to Catalina. She was drifting in and out of consciousness and in the dying rays of the sun, James could see that her face was almost gray.

"Cat, it's a beautiful little girl. Look at her."

Weakly, she tried to sit up and James slid behind her to prop her up, he had to wrap his arms around her arms in order for her to be able to hold the silent baby that was evidently too weak to cry.

"Oh God, Jamie she's beautiful! Margarita Elena, that's what I want to call her." Her voice was almost non-existent and James closed his eyes in despair at what this could mean.

"She's as beautiful as her Mama. Margarita Elena, I like that."

They heard voices shouting at each other in the distance. Rebels! James frantically glanced around wildly trying to find a place to hide them in the forest.

Catalina smiled at her baby, silent tears falling down her cheeks. Swallowing hard, she spoke with a quiet strength in her faltering voice.

"You have to take her to the village so she can be cared for, I'll wait here for you."

"Cat-"

"I'll be fine Jamie."

"Cat, you've lost a lot of blood, the ground beneath your feet is slick with it. If I leave you here they'll find you an'-"

"I'm dying anyway Jamie."

She knew! James couldn't bear the pain that he was feeling at Cat's admission. He didn't want to believe it but the placenta had blood in it and he knew this wasn't a good sign. Shaking his head he tried to argue, but she cut him off, her voice suddenly strong.

"I need you to promise me you'll look after her Jamie. Promise me you'll take care of Margarita."

"Cat, I am not going to promise you any such thing, I am going to take her to the village and then come back for you."

"_Promise_ me Jamie!"

"Cat-"

"There's nothing anyone can do for me now Jamie, you know that. Now stop wasting time and promise me, you have to go _now_."

James didn't hesitate, she was right they were wasting precious time, "I promise Cat. I'll take care of Margarita. I'm going to take her to the village then I'm comin' back for you."

Cat's eyes were a sea of gratitude, "That's why I love you miho, you don't give up. I know she'll be in good hands."

Raising a shaking hand she stroked his cheek, "Now go."

James was torn and he didn't want to leave her but the voices were closer and the ground was trembling at the sound of the marching soldiers.

Laying the baby down on the ground he carried Cat to a nearby tree trunk, and sat her up against it. Then he ran back to pick the baby up, kneeling in front of Cat trying to discern how lucid she was.

She struggled to open her eyes, "You're not going to get out of your promise by getting us all killed, Jamie. Go, I'll be fine… Don't forget to give Diego my message." She was smiling faintly at him and he could tell her spirit was failing.

He stared at her in abject misery holding the tiny whimpering baby in his hands, "Cat!"

"_Go_!" She whispered vehemently, fixing a steely glare on him. Nodding he kissed her forehead whispering, "I'll be back for you, I promise." Then getting up at a run he disappeared into the jungle.

James heard the sound of gunshots behind him as he ran through the forest with the baby clutched tightly in his arms. She did not utter a sound as he ran for both their lives, and when he arrived in the village yelling for help as he collapsed in the dirt, she was still quiet. Diego ran out of a nearby hut, with a rifle slung over his back, he took the baby from James' arms.

A thoughtful woman ran up with a water flask, giving it to the gasping James. He swallowed the water gratefully, as the village doctor took the baby from Diego and rushed to the makeshift hospital to check for any problems.

Diego was anxiously waiting for James to speak, "Where's Catalina? Who's baby is that?"

"That's Catalina's baby, she went into labor this morning and I couldn't move her. I left her back there, we have to go back for her." Groaning with effort James got to his feet unsteadily.

"Rebel soldiers were approaching and I took the baby and ran here. They chased me through the forest and I lost them about a mile back."

Diego's face fell, "How far away is she?"

James forced the words out, despite the pain they caused him, "'Bout six miles back from here."

Diego nodded, then he punched James hard in the face. "You left her in the hands of those murderers you cowardly sonofabitch!"

James had fallen to his knees from the blow, swaying where he knelt he spat blood out, "Do you really think now's the time for this, Diego? I have to go back for her, if you're not gonna come with me get outta ma way."

James could see the physical restraint Diego was exercising as he stopped himself from hitting James again. Angrily he said, "Get up, we're going now."

James stood up and accepting the semi-automatic someone handed him, he followed Diego and four other armed men out of the village and back into the jungle.

No one spoke the entire way there, when they got to the tree James had left Catalina under, Diego sank to his knees in agony, the soldiers had found her against the tree and had slit her throat.

"No. No. No. No. Not you angel, not _you_!" Diego's voice broke in pain as he cradled his dead sister's head in his arms.

James stared at the brother and sister in gut-wrenching torment, sinking to his knees he stared in anguished misery at Cat's lifeless form. The other men all broke down crying at the sight. Catalina was the light of hope in their unit and seeing her lifeless form against the tree was like witnessing the desecration of something holy.

Even in death, her ethereal beauty was evident and the men couldn't help but observe that it wasn't diminished in the slightest.

Sobbing in misery, Diego lifted his sister's corpse in his arms and turning to the men walked passed James and started the sorrowful walk back to the village.

Nobody spoke, and when they arrived at the village, people came out wailing in grief at the sight of Catalina.

James stood by as Diego laid his sister on a makeshift operating table, his eyes and face devoid of emotion.

Diego turned around and looked at James with venom spitting out of his eyes, "_You did this_! It's your fault she's dead. I'm taking her home to be buried, and I don't want you anywhere near her or my family! If I ever see you again I'll kill you! I swear to God, I'll fucking kill you!"

James didn't respond he just stood rooted to the spot, staring at Diego blankly. This incensed Diego even more and the grieving man attacked James beating him down with his flying fists.

James didn't fight back, he took the pain, welcomed it. Catalina was dead, they'd killed her because he'd made a choice, he'd saved the baby and himself and she'd died. James wished he was dead too, maybe if he didn't defend himself his wish would be granted.

Diego attacked him so viciously that he broke James' nose and jaw, before he was pulled off by the horrified bystanders.

"Let me go! I'll kill him! This is his fault! Catalina followed him into the jungle and look what happened! He sacrificed her so he could live!" It took all four men to hold Diego down as he cursed in Spanish his face twisted with rage and sorrow.

"I took you in and this is how you repay me, you're nothing! Scum! I wish you were dead instead of her! My _baby sister_, James! You killed my baby sister!" Finally Diego broke down and cried, the men lifted him up and took him to his tent, leaving a bloodied and injured James alone on the dirt floor.

Someone helped James up and took him to the hut that served as village hospital, the drugs the doctor injected in him rendered him unconscious when he was lucid again, Diego had taken Catalina and the baby.

That was the last time he had seen any of them.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Jolting back to reality James realized it was night time and tears were coursing down his face. He wasn't in El Salvador anymore he was on the Island. The meditation had forced him to confront the spectre of his past that had arisen with the visions of Catalina again, he hadn't thought of the events of that day in years, blocking it out of his mind.

Rising from the cold rock he noticed Ana-Lucia watching him, nonchalantly he wiped away the tears from his face.

"How long you been watchin' me Rambina?"

"Hours."

"Don't you know it's rude to watch people?"

"Sorry." She didn't sound sorry at all.

"What were you seeing James?"

"None of your damn business."

"What news of Frank?" James asked changing the subject as he helped Ana-Lucia up.

"Well, it looks like him and Locke know each other, Locke went a little batshit in the hatch. Tried to kill Frank, said somethin' about Frank stealing his kidney."

"No shit!"

"Yeah, was real messed up. Turns out Frank conned Locke into giving him one of his kidneys then after the procedure, he didn't wanna know about him anymore."

James shook his head, "Looks like he graduated from money cons to organ theft after he killed ma parents."

"Yeah looks like." Ana-Lucia said with a tinge of sadness in her voice. They were walking back to the beach.

"Between you and Locke that guy doesn't have a chance."

James looked at Ana-Lucia, "What makes you think I still wanna kill him?"

"It's in your eyes."

James snorted in dismissal of this perceptive observation, Ana-Lucia took a deep breath, "I also followed you 'cause I wanted to warn you. Jack's got it into his head that you're hiding something important from him so he's going to try and find out what is."

"We back to the torture thing again?"

"I don't know, I doubt Sayid will do it."

"I doubt _that_, Sayid likes it too much. What information does Jack think I'm keepin' from him?"

"Information about how you got to their camp, information you must have gotten from the guy you call André… that kinda thing."

James closed his eyes briefly in understanding, then he shrugged with indifference.

Ana-Lucia didn't say anything else and when they got back to the beach, James bid her goodnight before going into his tent.

Turning on his flashlight, he realized Kate was sitting on his makeshift bed. Getting up she walked up to him and kissed him.

James drew back searching her face for answers, "What was that for?"

Kate smiled at him seductively, she pressed her body against his then started to unbutton his shirt. James looked at her in confusion, 'Is she for real?'

When she pulled him towards the bed and straddled him, he had his answer, giving in to the moment James pulled her down to mesh his lips with hers. He needed to lose himself in her after his foray into past, now more than ever.

"Where were you tonight?" Kate asked huskily, her head pillowed on his shoulder, she was staring at the tent ceiling with a dreamy smile on her face.

"At the waterfall, I needed to be on my own for a little while."

"Is that why Ana-Lucia was there with you?"

"No. She followed me there."

Kate was silent for minute then, "James what else happened at the Other's camp?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean when you were in their hatch with their leader, what did he say?"

"Why do you wanna know?" James turned to look at her, and avoiding his eyes for a second, Kate looked him in the eye and said, "You said there were computers that could transmit off the Island. Did you manage to send a signal?"

James searched her face as the truth dawned on him, "You're doin' his dirty work for him aren't ya?"

Kate's eyes showed a flicker of guilt and alarm before she could cover it up, "I take it by him you mean Jack? What do you take me for Sawyer?"

'Sawyer! We're back to that are we?'

Rising angrily, James pulled on his jeans, "Get out Kate, for the love of God an' all that is holy get out _now_."

Kate felt fear when he grabbed her wrists and hauled her up, picking her clothes off the tent floor and throwing them at her.

"Does he know exactly how ya took it upon yourself to extract this info from me?"

Kate stared at him dumbly, holding her clothes in her arms.

"Does he?" James practically yelled at her, moving to tower above her threateningly.

"No." Kate answered in a fearful voice, she could feel absurd tears welling up behind her eyes.

Grabbing the clothes from her James shook out the jeans and flinging her on the bed began forcing her feet through the legs. Kate struggled as she took the waistband and pulled them up the rest of the way herself. James slammed the sweatshirt she'd been wearing over her head, painfully wrenching her arms through the sleeves.

Kate felt the tears slide down her face in misery as he hunted intently for her bra and underwear, turning on his flashlight to see better.

Picking them up, he hauled her off the bed and shoved the articles down her jean pockets.

"Now Matahari, get the hell out of ma tent." Pushing her out roughly, he held the flaps shut as she tried to get back in.

"James wait."

"I'm countin' to three Freckles then it's gonna get real ugly."

She stopped pulling at the tarp and walked away, bumping into Eko as she walked back to her tent.

The Nigerian looked at her with an unreadable look on his face, wiping away her tears she asked, "What?"

Eko just looked at James' tent then back at Kate before he walked away. Kate shrugged, dismissing the judgment she'd seen in his eyes and went into her own tent.

Sitting on the floor she mentally kicked herself. 'Well done Kate, you've really done it this time!'

What was wrong with her? Why did she always have this need to prove to Jack that she was competent and capable? Why had she taken it upon herself to get that information from James? It didn't take a genius to figure out that he would probably never trust her again. Wracked with guilt at her actions Kate curled up into a ball on her tent floor and tried to get to sleep.


	21. Chapter 21

Well folks this is the final chapter! Thank you all for your reviews so far. Remember as you read the end that this particular story was entitled **Never An Absolution** for a reason.

Let me know if you think I did the title and the idea behind the story any justice.

**Chapter 21**

James woke with a splitting headache, it was psycho-somatic he knew. He had fallen asleep last night with a burning rage in his heart at Kate's deception. Too angry to even think about what she had just done, he'd taken some sleeping pills he'd found in the hatch and welcomed the dreamless oblivion.

It was now three days after he'd sent out the signal to Travis about their situation. 'Any day now they'll be here.' He thought with relief. He couldn't wait to get off this damn Island and away from Kate. She was going to be the death of him. This time she'd gone too far. He couldn't forgive her for this. She snuck into his tent to sleep with him at night then in the daylight hours when Saint Jack was around she acted like nothing happened between them the night before. And now she was trying to do Jack's dirty work for him by using sex as a tool. 'Man she's really done a number on you.' He thought to himself self-mockingly.

James left the tent to go and take a much needed shower in the hatch. After he showered he walked into the kitchen where Ana-Lucia and Sayid were having breakfast.

"Good Morning James." Sayid greeted politely.

"Mornin' Ali, Rambina."

Pouring himself some cereal and milk James leaned against the kitchen sink to eat.

"How's Frank doin'?"

"Better, he can speak a little now." Sayid replied.

"Good. Sonofabitch owes me some answers."

"Answers about what?" Sayid enquired.

"About the mole."

"What mole?" Ana-Lucia piped up.

"André said there was a mole in our camp, someone who survived the crash with us but is one of them. They were waiting for Gale to make contact with the mole."

"I knew it." Breathed Sayid.

"When y'all came to find Libby and Bernard in the hatch yesterday, do you know if either one of them made contact with either prisoner?"

Sayid and Ana-Lucia looked at each other, "Not that we know of. You're not suggesting that Libby or Bernard are the mole are you?" Asked Sayid, disbelievingly.

James shrugged, "Gotta start somewhere."

"True, how about we start with you, James?" Demanded Jack as he sauntered into the room.

James rolled his eyes, "I'm startin' to get tired of your shit, Doc, why don't you stick to the doctorin' an' leave the heavy duty stuff to those in the know?"

"You're highly suspect disappearance doesn't make you in the know, it makes you someone very unreliable and quite frankly untrustworthy. Why are you giving us bits of information when you feel like it? Why didn't you tell anyone about this mole when you first got back? How do we know _you're_ not the mole? What else are you hiding from us James?"

All eyes were on James now, and he didn't like it one bit.

"Listen to me 'cause I'm only gonna say this once you smug sonofabitch. I don't plan on livin' or dyin' on this damn Island an' I most certainly don't plan on waitin' around like a sittin' duck while other people pick us off one by one, toy with us, steal our children an' poison their minds with God knows what bullshit. I figured long ago that there must be a mole or we must be under some sort of surveillance an' if you think that any conversation you have in this damn concrete monstrosity is a secret you're dumber than you look."

Jack, Ana-Lucia and Sayid all looked around the hatch uncomfortably at the mention of surveillance. None of them had given it much thought but it made a lot of sense.

"I ain't no hero Doc, that's your job, but I'm a survivor, I'll take anythin' the Fates throw at me an' I'll obey that animal instinct me to survive. I did us all a favor takin' out André, capturin' Frank an' bringin' back Walt. And suspicion and subterfuge is the thanks I get. Looks like ma Daddy was right all along, no good deed goes unpunished… but I'll be damned if I let you talk down to me ever again."

James was furious that was evident to everyone, and Sayid and Ana-Lucia both had a feeling that if Jack didn't apologize there would be a beat down reminiscent of the one they had witnessed a few days ago. Tensing in readiness to jump in should the need arise the two of them watched on with wary interest.

"I'm sorry, I was out of line. You managed to accomplish a whole lot more than any of us have since we got here and I'm sorry I was suspicious of you." Jack was immediately contrite and this successfully took the steam out of James' anger.

"Forget about it, we're all wound up pretty tight. Now how 'bout we put our heads together an' try to figure out who our mole is."

Everyone breathed a silent sigh of relief at James' acceptance of Jack's apology.

"Yeah sure. I meant to ask you yesterday, how's your rib?"

"Broke it again a few days ago. Don't worry 'bout it Jacko I've had worse injuries before an' I'm still here."

Jack smiled cynically at this, "Another reference to your mysterious past. Any chance you'll tell us about it?"

"Nah, it ain't that interestin' anyway. How 'bout we worry about the present and pay Frankie a visit?"

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

**That Night**

James groaned inwardly as he jolted his broken rib, Ana-Lucia had accosted him with bandages and such insisting that tough guy or not he had to take care of himself. He had to admit to himself that bound his rib was less painful and easier to ignore but he'd been conditioned to transcend physical pain and he was very good at it. What was more elusive was emotional pain _that_ he hadn't quite found a balance for.

Lying in the dark of his tent he felt a twinge of yearning for Kate, sharing his bed with her for some tension relieving sex was now making sleeping in here without it virtually impossible.

He'd seen her when he returned from the hatch, she'd been playing with the older kids, counting to ten as they all ran and hid. Their eyes had met briefly and he'd seen the shame and guilt in the green orbs as he pinned her with an ocean blue glare. She had been the first one to look away and James had felt an unwelcome emptiness after he carried on walking.

It didn't help that Ana-Lucia had asked him, "¿Cuál es tan el reparto con usted y Kate¿Es usted dos que lo hacen o no?" (_Translation: "So what's the deal with you and Kate? Are you two doing it or not?_")

James had obviously denied it, which he reasoned wasn't a complete lie. They had been but they most certainly wouldn't be anymore.

James pricked his ears at the sound of footsteps outside his tent, holding his breath he cursed himself for hoping it was Kate.

Kate stood hesitantly, it was two in the morning and she was standing outside his tent, she wanted to go in and melt into his embrace desperately, but last night's rough ejection kept replaying in her mind. 'Maybe he's asleep, or maybe he's not even there.' She told herself, unconsciously taking another step towards the entrance. Reaching her hand out to push open the flap, she let it fall to her side uselessly, 'Who are you kidding Kate? He will not welcome you this time. You fucked this up just face it. Leave it alone. This is what you wanted isn't it? He won't be chasing you with those expressive eyes of his and he certainly doesn't have anything to say to you. Anything nice that is. Now you're free to explore your feelings for Jack without worrying about hurting James' feelings.'

Still she wavered at the entrance, chewing her lip in frustrated indecision.

James was standing now, his heart beating fast, 'Kate.' He could feel it was her in the very marrow of his bones. Attuning all his senses to the form outside his tent he imagined he could hear her breathing. Walking as if compelled by a magnetic force, James stood right outside the entrance. He heard her breath catch in her throat when she realized how close he was. Lifting his hand towards the flap, James hesitated, 'If you let her in you lose all sense of dignity and self respect. Either way she's not for you, so what's the point?'

He let his hand fall to his side and steeling himself against the weaker voice inside him he turned back to his bed and lay down.

Kate had heard him walk to the entrance and heard him walk away a few minutes later. 'Well, I guess now you know, Kate. He's not interested in anything you have to say.' Sadly she walked back to her tent, her heart aching acutely.

She must have dozed off for an hour because her watch said it was just after three a.m., Kate left her tent deciding to sit under the palm tree and wait for the sun to rise. She didn't bother to slip on the boots Jin had made for her using boar hide. Instead she just walked out barefoot in her jeans and sweatshirt because it was a little cold, and sat down under the tree.

James walked around from the other side of the tree where he'd been standing and sat down next to her.

"I didn't see you there." She said speaking softly.

"I know. I saw ya flinch." He replied just as softly.

"Congratulations on catching Libby as the mole. I think it broke Hurley's heart the way she resisted even though it was clear to see she was the one."

James did not respond, he just inclined his head slightly in acknowledgement of the compliment. He ran his hand through his shorn locks in an unconscious gesture of impatience.

"Do you think you'll ever be able to forgive me?" Kate asked suddenly.

"That depends."

"Depends on what?"

"On whether our rescue team shows up tomorrow mornin' to get us off this godforsaken Island."

"So I'll take that as a no." She said dejectedly.

"I'm serious Kate. While I was in the hatch with André I managed to send a distress signal out to ma brother Travis."

Kate looked at him in surprise, "I didn't know you had a brother."

"There's a lot 'bout me you don't know."

"Why didn't you tell anyone about the signal?"

"I didn't think it was important at the time."

"And you do now?"

"Only person I've told is you Sass."

"Why?"

"Why? Cause I figured anyone who's willin' to use their body to get information, and manages to do so, deserves to get what they came for." Watching her for a reaction, he wasn't disappointed at the tensing of her shoulders.

"I know you better than you think Kate. I know you'll never admit to me or even yourself that whatever bad feelings you got locked in your heart, I make you feel somethin' you don't want to feel. What is it Kate? What do I bring up inside you that scares you so much?"

Kate took a deep breath then let it out, staring out into the darkness she didn't answer.

James reached into his pocket and lit a cigarette, smoking silently by her side he waited. Halfway through the cigarette she finally answered, "Alive. You make me feel alive, and… it hurts. And I resent you for it."

"I thought as much… No good deed goes unpunished." James replied matter-of-factly.

"So why did you ask me?"

"'Cause I wanted to hear you say it."

"I guess we've both committed sins against each other, James. Where do we go from here?" Kate asked, her voice fraught with emotion.

"Think you can forgive me for that?" His light tone belied the emotional investment he was holding in her answer.

"I don't know." She answered truthfully.

Flicking his cigarette in the sand, James looked out at the water.

"I don't know if I can forgive bein' used either." He spoke sincerely, his voice betraying the hurt he felt at her actions.

They sat in a painful silence, each lost in their own thoughts.

When the sun began to rise, helicopters and a ship appeared on the horizon; Kate's eyes widened, a fragile hope beating in her chest.

James lit another cigarette, "Smile sweetheart, looks like Christmas has come a lil early this year, the Rangers are here."


End file.
